- 8 years ago
- Wedding: June 2009
So, my DH and I are heading home to visit my parents the weekend of Dec 18. My grandma on my mom’s side is the only one alive. She’s in an assisted living home down there. She’s had a stroke and can’t walk well and it has caused her to forget her english and regress back to korean and japanese mostly. She understands english perfectly, but can’t speak it very well. My mom wanted to pick her up and bring her home that Sunday so we can all celebrate Christmas as a family (mom, dad, grandma, me and DH. that’s our little tiny family).
Well, my dad told my mom NO, her mom can’t come to Christmas! My grandma!!! Why?! So he can “spend more quality time with EJS and her husband”. I’m still pretty livid over the selfishness of this. Like her sitting there, observing Christmas with us all is some huge imposition. She’s not active–she just likes to be around us, ya know?
I told mom this is ridiculous and I won’t stand for it. It’s the opposite of being what family is. She says, “well, he’s said his peace, i’ve said mine, it is what it is”. Like no big deal. She says I can bring it up to him later, nonconfrontationally as long as we don’t get into a fight over this.
My mom also told me to put a “bug” in DH’s ear about spending Christmas next year with them because otherwise it’s not fair to them–we “have” to trade off holidays. She was kinda rude about this–just us would be allowed to come–none of the rest of our/his family. Frankly, if Christmas is going to be JUST the 4 of us, I don’t want to go. We eat, we open gifts, then we sit. That’s it. It’s not really “fun” like DH’s family, who plays games and drinks and has music and white elephant exchange and stuff like that. So, I told mom “we’ll see” because we will be trying soon and I might be in my third trimester by next December. She says I should come anyways. Um, sorry, I won’t be travelling 5 hours away in my 3rd trimester if I can help it. She doesn’t see the big deal in me flying or driving…really, we just kinda don’t want to go. Christmas is hard at my parents’ house since my brother died. I’d rather be somewhere entertaining, I hate to say. And i don’t want to be that far away from a real doctor and a real hospital, either!
Christmas vent over. The anti-family attitude is depressing. I’m not really looking forward to going home in 2.5 weeks =(
Wow that was SO LONG! Thanks for reading. I’ll tell Santa you don’t get coal this year =]