Post # 1
Seeing another post about what brides to be are buying their hubs sparked an issuethat hasn’t been resolved (I dont think it ever can be…) with my hubs.
He knew I was planning two surprises for him and made it clear I was getting him something special. The day of the wedding, I hid a scrapbook that I put together for him, that had sexy boudoir shots and love notes about how he turns me on through it. I also included some photos from our E shoot. Inside was a card I wrote for him.
At the reception, I wrote him a song with my brother and his friend (who are both amazing musicians). We worked two months on the song, perfecting it. He was so surprised that I wrote him a song, and that I went to such effort.
As far as a gift goes, he got me nothing…not even a card 🙁
I dont know how to take that-I guess he didn’t figure he should get one. I tried to mention it to him, and he said “I thought we werent getting gifts”..
Umm…I said very clear I was surprising him with a gift, he had plenty of heads up and I didnt agree to such a thing…
I decided to drop it. But I am feeling a bit bothered that I planned a wedding in fie months, did a tonne of wedding work, did all those surprises…and my normally sweet, caring and giving man didn’t buy a clue to give a gift.
Sad face. 🙁
Post # 3
Ok, then just tell him you expect a nice gift during your honeymoon.
Post # 4
@fivemonthsnotice: did you guys discuss gifts prior to the wedding. DH and I agreed that our wedding and honeymoon was our gift to eachother…
Post # 5
I think you need to get over it. Giving gifts to one another when getting married is not mandatory. You got married because you love each other not because you are getting each a gift on your wedding day. Your gift should be the marriage to each other. My DH and I did not get each other gifts nor was any gifts expected. Our gift to each other is our lives we joined in marriage….
Post # 6
@fivemonthsnotice: Men have to be told things point blank. They aren’t as emotional as us. They don’t think how a sweet song or random flowers would make us feel. We got to tell them. Seriously, when I want flowers (even though I know it would mean a bit more if DH just did it on his own) I tell him. “Hey honey, bring me flowers!” Even hints don’t work. Just got to be blunt.
Post # 7
Until I joined WB, I had no idea that gifts between one another was a thing. I mentioned it to passing yesterday to FI on our drive home and his response was “What? We’re suppose to give each other gifts….on to of everything else???” haha. I don’t know if we’ll end up doing that, but if we do, I’m going to have to discuss it with him, because he’s probably already forgotten the conversation.
The things you did for him were really sweet. Really, very sweet. But I’m sure you didnt do it because you were expecting a gift in return. That’s not what gifts like that are about. So unless you specifically told him that you expected a gift from him, I don’t think you can fault him for not coming through with one.
*my outlook on this may be very biased, though 😛 FI and I are awful with presents. I still haven’t gotten him a birthday present (his was in May), if he got me one, I don’t remember what it was, and we don’t do annversery or Valentines presents or anything. So I think if I were you, I wouldn’t be feeling the same as you may, having an emphasis on it. If that makes any sense. Regardless, have you spoken to him about it?
Post # 9
@Vidya: I agree…I’d never, ever heard of people giving gifts to each other on their wedding day.
What you did was incredible…but it is a gift, you should want to give it because giving it makes you happy. You could suggest that he surprise you with something for your birthday or anniversary or Valentines.
Post # 10
@Sassygrn: I know I should get over it…I guess I went a bit over the top on the personal side of my gift giving and just surprised…and a little deflated that he didnt even give me a card…something.
Id like to talk to him about it but not sure how.
Post # 11
Honestly I can understand how it would hurt you that he didn’t get you anything… but… He’s a guy. I thought about it and my guy wouldnt either unless I told him I was getting him a gift. It’s not that he does not care, he just does not know or think about those things. Us womens think about everything!
Post # 12
I think you guys should be enjoying your newlywed bliss not worrying about gifts. I think when you give someone something you should do it because you want to, not because you expect something back. From what you said it doesn’t seem like he agreed or commited to getting you a gift. All of the things you did were thoughtful and nice, I wouldn’t ruined it by making a deal out of this.
Post # 13
I have to agree with TwoCityBride.. You guys should be enjoying newlywed bliss and not worrying about gifts. I personally wouldn’t even bring it up, why make your new husband feel guilty for something he may or may not have realized that was supposedly expected of him. Enjoy the feeling of newly married!
Post # 14
Get over it. You just got married and crying over not getting a gift? Who cares! You married the love of your life. You got him something, because you wanted too. Don’t ever expect anything in return.
Post # 15
@fivemonthsnotice: It seems like lately you have been spending a lot of time posting about what went WRONG with your wedding, between the MIL, the cousin, and now the absent gift.
Why not make a list of things that went RIGHT about the wedding, and surround yourself with thoughts of those things?
Post # 16
@Sassygrn: I guess I haven’t really enjoyed being newly married. It was one drama BS thing after another. Now is not the time to chat about it, I guess I was pretty let down by quite a few people, and am sort of clumping all of those emotions together at this point, along with all the people that really surprised me on our wedding day.