Post # 1
I am here to vent. I have been sick with a sinus infection/laryngitis for About 10 days.. Last week, my Darling Husband was like “our house is a disaster” I need you to pick up. our house was not a disaster, but to keep the peace, I crawled out of bed to clean up, and then got back in bed. yesterday, i had a painful nose procedure at the ent, so ive been in pain, and havent slept. Last night we were in bed watching Tv, and i tossed an empty water bottle on the floor bc my nightstand was full off tissues and meds. He lost his shit. I was obviously going to pick it up when I got up. We have different schedules, so don’t always sleep at the same time, but every time we are sleeping together, and I start snoring, he pushes my shoulder and is like “you’re snoring” so I change positions. Last night at like 3 am, he woke me up, so I was going to move to another bedroom. He moved instead but was yelling “I’m so tired of this shit” (referring to my snoring, I since I normally don’t) and went out and slammed the door. Then I guess he came back in this morning and was sitting awake on the ipad, and wakes me up again for snoring. I got upset, because he could just deal with it or move to another room. He was like “I’m tired of this. I had to deal with you being sick on my birthday weekend.” I hope nothing serious ever happens to me, because I’m fucked.
Post # 3
Is something else going on? He seems like he lost it over something pretty minor.
Post # 4
@sweetbee29: On no 🙁 First off, I hope you get over all of this really soon, you must be miserable being sick this long. Has this always been how he reacts to you? It seems strange that he would be so upset by this. Maybe something else is going on?
Post # 5
Yes, your husband was certainly acting like an ass last night! Maybe he was having a tough week at work and this just was the last straw and he decided to take out his frustrations on you? Still doesn’t make it right.
Hope you feel better soon!
Post # 6
@sweetbee29: I hope you feel better soon. I completely agree with PPs about whether something more is going on. Has he always been like this or is this something new? I know someone people are seriously clean freaks, but this seems really unreasonable to me.
Post # 7
@sweetbee29: *HUGS* Hope you feel better soon. Maybe he’s just cranky because you both haven’t been sleeping well? Hopefully, he’ll realize he’s overreacting and appologize you. If this is the “norm” for you guys I’d consider some couple’s counseling, your last statement is a bit startling.
Post # 8
Post # 9
@sweetbee29: There has to be something else upsetting him. No one gets that upset over being irritated by snoring. I hate when people snore because I can’t sleep, but if you snoring is annoying him THAT BAD while he is awake then there is something he needs to get off his chest.
Being sick really does suck and cleaning the house isn’t going to help you get better. He should be [lovingly] taking care of you. He’s upset about his birthday? Tell him to grow up.
Post # 10
Ya I wouldn’t put up with that. If it were me, I’d leave for a few days. He can’t even do “in sickness and in health”. Hope that you feel better.
Post # 11
He was like “I’m tired of this. I had to deal with you being sick on my birthday weekend.”
Holy what? I just.. I can’t even imagine even my most assholish, awful exes ever saying something like that. i can’t imagine most adults I know saying something like that. Is this a new behavior pattern for him or is this how he’s always been?
Either way, I would think some counseling would be in order. Even if this is just a short-term reaction to new stressors, you’re right, it does NOT bode well for the kind of reaction you might meet in future times of hardship.
Post # 12
@sweetbee29: next time he says anything to you about it, just say:
“If i wanted to hear from an asshole, i would have just farted.”
Post # 13
@sweetbee29: I would have ripped him a new asshole if he had said that to me. totally unacceptable.
However, I do think that no matter how sick you are you should be a little cleaner with things like tissues and such because that’s a good way to spread germs. I would get a small trash can and keep it by your bed for tissues and empty whenever it’s full. Even when I am sick I can do minimal things, not because im on a mission to clean but because getting rid of the germ filled things like tissues will help everyone. I understand (to an extent) being annoyed with the water bottle thing and with the tissues being on the nightstand therefore making you throw the bottle on the floor. No matter what though there is a way to address it and he can easily help you out by saying “here, here is a trash can. Ill leave this by the bed for you so you don’t leave the yucky tissues on the nightstand”.
As for the snoring that is something he needs to just shut up about and move into another room. He seems like he needs to work on his communication skills a bit. I would talk to him about it when you feel up to it because it seems ther emight be more going on than him just being annoyed with snoring.
Post # 14
Is this the norm? Is this how he’s always been? You’ve been married for a year and together for longer, so I can’t imagine that his attitude is a surprise…unless he was just truly in a spectacularly rotten mood? Just looking for a little more background info.
Post # 15
Not justfying his behaviour at all….but my husband snores, and some nights when his snoring keeps me awake and i’m exhausted, i. could. kill. him. It’s totally irrational, but i get SO ragey.
Post # 16
@Bexx: I died laughing at that LOL
@sweetbee29: Your husband does sound like a jerk. Is there another reason he is acting this way? Kinda seems odd he is so mad just because you are sick..everyone gets sick.