My Husband's Best Friend is Cheating on His Pregnant Wife

posted 3 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
1864 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: March 2014

Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry that your friend is going through this. I can’t even imagine. And pregnant on top of it all. How many months is she? Do you know who this other woman is? Friend? Coworker? 

I can’t believe he had the audacity to tell her not to touch him because his gf would get jealous. WOW!!

I hope she pulls through this quickly and stays strong for herself, her daughter, and her little one inside her. 

Also, you sound like a great friend and she is really lucky to have you in her life to help her through this! 

Post # 5
1057 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Wow. That’s terrible. The silver lining is that she has you for a friend. I would suggest to just continue to be there for her and maybe she will get the courage to seek counseling (couples or individual) or leave her husband. Either way, she needs a lot of support at this time. Hope it all works out. 

Post # 7
584 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

It’s not usual for me to wish bad things upon someone, but if this man wants to leave his pregnant wife for his girlfriend I hope the wife gives puts the scumbag and his girlfriend through hell.

Best wishes for you and his poor wife!

Post # 8
7284 posts
Busy Beekeeper

@DillyDally:  Has you husband talked to his friend? And has the friend confirmed that what the wife has said is true? Just because she is pregnant does not mean that she is telling the truth. I would get your FI to at least talk to his friend. As a friend he owes hime the chance to tell his side of the story.

Post # 9
557 posts
Busy bee

@DillyDally:  That is totally messed up on so many levels. Does she have a supportive family? Thank goodness she has you and your husband.


I am NOT sticking up for this dude and his horrible decision making and cold heart, but it also sounds like he probably has a lot of emotional stuff that he is going through. I can only imagine that finding out what he found out, getting deported, etc can make someone lose faith and question everything about their past, present and future-including the life that they are living. Again that is no excuse and he should have sought out counseling rather than giving up everything he had on a whim.

I agree with the pp that your husband should talk to him and find out what he is actually thinking. If his response truly is a douche response-then everyone should leave him alone.

In general I am not a fan of women taking a man for all he’s got out of spite-but this is a fantastic example of a time when she should spend the money on the best lawyer in the area and make sure she gets everything she deserves- she should start documenting things to bring to court and get him!

Post # 11
7531 posts
Bumble Beekeeper

This clearly shows what a good friend you are.  I am so sorry for this poor woman.  I hope that she can find inner strength to move beyond this for her sake and the sake of her children. 

Post # 12
45 posts
  • Wedding: July 2014

If he got his green card only two years ago, and it was because he married her, then that green card is still conditional and he’s going to lose it for divorcing her. If he has already gotten a non-conditional green card… Then I’m sort of suspicious that he just outright used her to get the green card. That whole thing about desperately wanting children and then suddenly doing a full 180 two years later just stinks of trying to fulfill some visa requirements or appease immigration officials. It’s a nasty, nasty thing, and yet a whole bunch of people still slip through all the security measures meant to stop them and do this to honest people who have no idea they’re being taken for a ride. 


If it IS one of those cases, then it’s especially bad, because she – or her family, if they chose to co-sponsor him with her – are probably financially responsible for him by law. When you get a green card by family ties, the family member petitioning for it has to sign a paper stating that they are fully financially responsible for the person until they’ve worked for what amounts to about five years of full-time work. Before they have, the government can sue the sponsor for all social security, government insurance, food stamps etc. payments that the green card holder gets.

For her sake, I kind of wish that he hasn’t gotten his proper green card yet. I know he grew up in the US and was screwed over by his aunt – which was completely awful of her, and I can understand why he would be a little maladjusted emotionally – but if he’s committed immigration fraud in her footsteps, then he is no better than she is. Add the whole cheating business on top of that, and destroying someone else’s life… There needs to be some serious, serious consequences for this. This is not okay.

If you’re genuinely worried about the sudden change in his behavior, then you should try to get him to see a psychologist of some sort, or otherwise have his mental state evaluated. It can be entirely possible that it’s drugs or some underlying mental issue that’s behind all this, and that the sweet person is still somewhere in there… But regardless, it’s probably best if he gets out of his wife’s life, because her reaction to the whole thing is even more worrying. I understand being extremely upset, but not eating while you’re pregnant… I don’t think he’s good for her.

Post # 13
7997 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2013

What the hell? This guy sounds like a real catch. Sorry, but anyone who would actually believe that a divorce could be finalized in a week deserves him. Omg.

I hope she is able to get away from him. What a shame. Poor girl.


Post # 14
689 posts
Busy bee

That guy has a rude awakening coming to him legally, for real, both for his green card stuff as @An-chan mentioned and for the storm that divorce/child support brings with it.

@DillyDally:  when you say physically forced her to text her…what do you mean? If he’s violent, you should see to it that she is safe.


Post # 15
1312 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2014 - NH

It’s a scary thought to think that you’re alone in the world, and pregnant with another child as well.  I’d offer her support and personally, if he wants to be friends with him whatever, but I’d still talk to her and try to show her how strong she is and the resources available to her.

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