Post # 1
My husband and I visit my in-laws and his sister every 1-2 months (they live a 5 hour drive from us). Since we don’t see them often, we always have lots of plans when we visit – golf, dinner, ballgame, drinks, etc. They all have no problem being out late (midnight/1ish) and I’m used to going to bed around 10, or 11 at the latest. Then we are always up early (7ish) for other plans. Since I don’t recover well from late nights, I’m always exhausted and not feeling my best. If we were at their house, I would have no problem politely excusing myself to go to bed, but seems like we’re always out, so I’m dependent on their schedule. I don’t want to skip visits since we always have fun – it’s just that I need to get more sleep (we’re also ttc). Not sure if I need to just suck it up every time we visit, or if there’s a way I can manage the circumstances better. Any advice?
Post # 3
@GirlNextDoor: Since you don’t visit that often, I have two suggestions – 1. Just deal with it because it’s not like it is every week (and I know their intention is to show you a good time), or 2. Bring your own car so that you can still partake in the activities, but you can also decide when the activities end.
I am also a person who values getting enough sleep, so I know how you feel.
Post # 4
@MrsPanda99: These are the only solutions I can think of as well.
Post # 6
Do you have a good enough relationship to just tell them in advance? “Hey, we usually stay out pretty late. I’m feeling pretty tired today, any chance we can make this an early night?” Hopefully they’ll eventually get the point.
Otherwise, MrsPanda’s suggestions are really good ones!
Post # 7
Couldn’t you have a chat with your in laws about how you need to go to bed earlier and ask them to take it into consideration when making plans? My parent’s know that FI is pretty much a zombie after 9:30 at night and have never planed anything to keep him up past then. Heck his late evening sleepiness is a good part of the reason why we’re having a day time wedding, he’d never make it all the way through a night one.
Post # 8
Thanks for all of these great suggestions, ladies – I’ll give them a try! Maybe i can also find a way to work a nap into the day so I can sustain the late night better 🙂
Post # 9
Just tell them that you love visiting them, but it’s hard on you because you are always tired from the hours, and ask them not to schedule anything after 10PM/before 8AM. They won’t know you feel that way if you don’t say anything.
Post # 10
@GirlNextDoor: I know this feeling!! I go to bed at 10 or 11 each night and when we go places I usually bring my own car so that I can leave when I feel like it and others can stay longer