My MIL has just crossed the line and I'm livid!

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
1582 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@Aquaria:  If she is not offering to pay for this house that she is envisioning for you then she needs to stop that nonsense right now! I am sorry, meddling MILs are the worst!

Post # 4
3570 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

Tell her you appreciate the thought, but that you are not interesting in a house right now and tell her to cancel the appointment.  Better yet, have your DH call her ASAP

Post # 5
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

What is your relationship like with your MIL (prior to this, obviously)? I would be livid as well! I would just not meet her tomorrow and tell her that you and your husband are not interested in buying right now. What does your husband think?!

Post # 6
457 posts
Helper bee

Wow! I am so sorry this is happening to you! At this point sounds like the best thing you can do is be point blank honest with her! Sounds like she will not get the hint otherwise (unless of course she is BUYING you this housE–she really does not have a say!!). Geesh!

Post # 7
460 posts
Helper bee

I would call the realtor and tell him or her that you have ZERO plans to buy a house, and if he/she wants to waste his/her time on a ghost chase with your delusional MIL, that is their choice, but you won’t be showing up. 

Good God, she has some balls! Sorry you are having to deal with that kind of behavior. What does your hubby say about it all? 


Post # 9
729 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

Have your DH deal with her first – I think it’s better to let blood deal with blood, instead of you getting in there as the inlaw (outlaw? ha!). If that doesn’t work, then you deal with her. “MIL, we are not buying a house, period. Do not share our personal information with anyone.” Then call the realtor and let them know that she is full of it. DO NOT show up for this appointment, or you will be adding fuel to the fire. If she continues on this way (especially sharing your information – what a huge invasion) then refuse to see her.

Maybe that sounds cold, but people like this need the gentleness of a 2×4.

Post # 10
1771 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Yeah, you definitely need to tell her (if you haven’t already) that you’re not interested in buying a house right now. What kind of information is she sharing with sellers? There’s some definite privacy issues there. I think your DH needs to have a talk with his mom ASAP. She shouldn’t be giving random people your personal info!

In the meantime, I would just ignore any appointments she’s made. You have no obligation to go to them.

Post # 12
11668 posts
Sugar Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

WTF. I’d tell the agent you are not buying a house any time soon.  Why a realtor would even do that is beyond me.  Your MIL is wasting the agents time.  Does she plan on buying this house for you? If not, she needs to back off!  You really shouldn’t even start looking at houses unless you’ve been preapproved for a mortgage.  Since you obviously haven’t been through that process, sellers aren’t really going to be interested in you as a potential buyer.


Post # 13
42117 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

This is your husband’s mother. Tell him to lay down the law with his mother.

Post # 15
1102 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

@Aquaria:  breath sweetie and calm so you can relax its not fair that you need to be stressed out at all you should not have to live someone elses life 


live your life how you want to, ask your SO to say something to her don’t even deal with it ur self its not fair that they would expect you to be in the middle of that .


if you must grab the bull by the horns go for coffee with your MIL ur both gonna be able to ramain calmer in public and nicely thank her for taking the time to look but tell her a house is just not right for you as a couple, the space is daunting the up keep would be to much form a yard to added spaces to clean. Tell her you know she wants good things for you but you are both very happy where you are now and do not need to have a big move right now perhapse in a few years.

Post # 16
3787 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: June 2011

What a psycho! I’m sorry. Please don’t let this woman bully you.  “No, I won’t be doing that.” should suffice. And your DH NEEDS TO STEP IN. What a loon. “Mom, we aren’t buying a house. It’s not up for discussion. The end.” Then don’t indulge her at all. 

I’m sorry, I hope you and DH can put up a united front on this one. What a piece of work. 

If it makes you feel any better, my FIL is totally insane. i just had to draw a really strict line and disengage last week after he basically threatened me among other things. Hang in there.

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