My mom wants nothing to do with my wedding?

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
4879 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 2010

Would she be open to family counseling?

You’ve told her how you feel–beyond that, there isn’t anything you can do.  If she misses her daughter’s wedding, it will be her own choice.

I’m sorry you have to go through this–it must really hurt.

Post # 3
1062 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: May 2015

I suggest counseling if she’s open to it, but if she’s not, then I would just plan the wedding without including her. You can only do so much. The other person has to put in some effort too. I know it’ll be hard, but sometimes it’s best to just accept the situation and do the best that you can. It’ll save you from a lot of heartache that way. 

Post # 4
3195 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2010


Sometimes parents do not like to accept that their adult children make decisions that they do not approve of, so they like to place the blame on their adult children’s partners. You cannot make your mother accept your choice. Perhaps she will come around once she sees that you’re not going to change your mind. I know this is very painful for you and I’m sorry that your mother is unsupportive. It hurt me deeply when my mother would not be supportive while I was engaged. 

That said, 40 years is a HUGE age gap and I can see why your parents would be concerned about their daughter marrying someone who is so much older. I’m not saying that your marriage will not work out because of the age difference. I am just reminding you that you are still a very young woman and your husband is nearly retirement age. You will certainly be a young widow unless you develop a terminal illness early in life or have a fatal accident. You may also have to nurse your husband through age related illness. I only want to give you some important things to consider.

Post # 5
829 posts
Busy bee

Lizandy:  ” I’ve explained to her that she doesn’t have to support my decision and that I just want her there to support me but she doesn’t understand.”– I don’t understand either. Supporting you means supporting your decisions.

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