My Mother in-law to be is driving me CRAZY!!!!!

posted 3 years ago in Family
Post # 3
2062 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 1987

It is you and your fiance’s wedding.  Decide between you what you both would like.  Everyone else should support you in this – and be grateful that they are invited to the wedding.

Your mother-in-law has already had her own wedding I assume.  It isn’t fair that she should have a second wedding – i.e. yours.

It may be that she wants to help and if this is the case and you can find her something useful/helpful to do then it might be a good thing.  But don’t let her take over. 

If she is threatening not to come to the wedding you both are going to have to stand firm and not give in to such blackmail. 

Post # 4
1613 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2011

@weddinglol22:  Your MIL is trying to be persistant to get her way. There is nothing wrong with avoiding her phone calls and if she calls at work saying “I have a client in office, I will call you later”

When she sends you stuff, you can say something like “this is nice but not for a Mexican beach wedding.”

Post # 5
845 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2015

@weddinglol22:  She isn’t paying, she doesn’t get a say. Your FI should be the one putting her in her place.

Post # 6
32 posts

as others have said, its not her day, let her try to help wherever you want her to, but kindly as soneone else said, tell her what is and isnt suitable for what youve planned already i.e a smallish mexico beach wedding

Post # 7
49 posts
  • Wedding: October 2014

Every mother has dreams of her childrens wedding- however, that does not mean you should abide by these dreams. You have dreams of your own for your wedding! Believe me, anyone and everyone will have opinions on every last detail of your big day. As far as I’m concerned, every detail about my wedding is on a need to know basis. If you follow what everyone else wants for your wedding, you will regret it in the future. Do what you want on your big day- although it might cause some feuds right now, at the end of the day, people will put aside their differences and come to celebrate the day with you and your FI. No matter what you choose, you know that your future MOH would not miss that day for the world. Try not to stress (easier said than done)… This is the best time of your life! 🙂

Post # 8
2364 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: November 2014

Agree with everyone above.  My mother was fairly insistent on a church wedding when I could take it or leave it, and my fiance flat out didn’t want it.  It didn’t come free (or even cheap!) but she is fronting the money, and it turned out we really came to love our pastor and the church is beautiful…getting off topic…

You HAVE to do whatever you want.  What does your fiance say about all of this?  Does she have any daughters?

You should message ‘groomsfather’.  We chatted yesterday and he gave me an interesting perspective as family of the groom. 

Post # 9
4893 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

She can’t hijack your wedding plans just because she’s the mother of the groom. You and your fiance are adults and can make your own decisions. Even if she was paying, I don’t think that gives her the right to decide everything.

I’d tell her you appreciate her thoughts and ideas, but your mind is made up. End of story.

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