Post # 1
So, i moved to mexico to be with the love of my life, and all things considered it worked out simpler for us to get married here (my fiance has a huge family and i have my parents and my sister…so to get 3 ppl to mexico was easier than getting 30+ ppl to england)
So maybe its the distance and my mum feels left out, i dont know, but every time i mention the wedding she changes the subject! “We went to do our food tasting today” “great. today 30 children came to the hospital for a tour” (shes a hospital chaplain) or “im thinking about blue bridesmaids dresses” “sounds lovely. tomorrow im having dinner with my friend___”
i do get my wedding is far more interesting to me than anyone else, but my mum doesnt seem to want to discuss any aspect of it…i guess i thought as her first daughter to get married she’d care more than she seems to
and, im blessed, my parents are contributing money (a lot) to the wedding with no strings attached, so i suppose compared to all the people with lots of demands im lucky but i imagined planning weddings as a bonding moment…and she wont talk about it at all
Post # 3
@jessitaylor: You and I share a similar problem. My grandmother, my mother is deceased, does the same thing when I talk about the wedding. She changes the topic to something about her. Perhaps you could ask her why she changes the subject when you bring anything up about the wedding? I asked my grandmother recently why she changes the subject when I bring up anything at all about myself and she apologized. I then felt guilty because I know she is getting older. Sometimes, I think other people, our parents included, are so consumed with what is going on in their on lives that they have a hard time contributing emotionally to ours. And sometimes, to be honest, people are just self-centered. Not saying this is your mother’s case. Maybe she feels like that’s something you could easily handle and you don’t need her input. Perhaps if you told her how excited you are about your wedding and how much her input on your wedding and advice would mean to you she’d talk more to you about it?
Post # 4
ive tried, but when youre really excited and hit a brick wall it kind of kills it. shes not happy about me becoming catholic (shes a church of england vicar) so im wondering if this might contribute to it. sometimes i feel so alone… my older sister was ready to marry her boyfriend (to the point they were looking at engagement rings and then he backed out and they broke up) so i feel like i cant talk to her either
my fiances mum has been a great substitute…dress shopping etc, but its not the same. i guess i want my mum to be super excited with me, even if its only via skype or email
Post # 5
@jessitaylor: My mom and I have a very odd relationship. We did not talked for 2 years and just recently made up. I always knew when I was getting married she would be weird. It bothers me a little but honestly I read some of the stories in here and I am glad. I look at it this way at least I can plan my wedding and have it the way I want it.