Post # 1
I have just got engaged and i would like for my parents and in laws to meet as they never have, but the problem is that they live in different countries. M parents are from Italy and his parents are from England and i don’t know what to do! We are holding the wedding in my home town in Italy, so it would make sense for my parents to fly out there but it just seems like a lot of money for a simple meeting! I was thinking maybe taking my future in laws on holiday there and then seeing my parents but i don’t know if they would be up for that. What should i do??
Post # 4
I wouldn’t worry about it. My parents and ILs won’t be able to meet until a few days before our reception in Ireland (where the ILs live). Sometimes there’s nothing to be done. If you’re having your wedding in Italy I assume your in-laws will be flying into Italy as well – maybe they could fly in a little early so you guys have some time to hang out? Or you could try a skype conference call or something (might be a wee bit awkward though, but maybe that’s just me, skype always makes me feel awkward).
Post # 5
I agree with ElbieKay. DH and I are in our 30s and our parents didn’t meet until the wedding b/c they live in opposite sides of the U.S. It was the one and only time they’ve met and my mom and MIL text each other all the time now.
Post # 6
I wouldn’t worry about it too much. My parents and his parents have never met and they live within 90 minutes of each other. My mother is evil so it’s for the best. I am hoping she doesn’t make it to my wedding too.
Post # 7
I second the Skype comment if you’re really worried about them talking to each other beforehand. It’s an inexpensive way for them to get to “meet.” Otherwise, I think it’s fine if they just meet the few days before the wedding. You have an interesting situation and I think it’ll be fine!
Post # 8
They are not my actual parents, in fact they she has no relation to me what so ever, but they fostered me for a while, so i see her as a mum. Does that make a difference, should they even meet if she isn’t my mum??
Post # 9
My mom has only met my FMIL over Skype. My mom is here and FMIL is in Scotland. They won’t meet in person until a couple of days before the wedding.
Post # 10
- Wedding: September 2013 - Ontario, Canada
We had the same situation – my family lives in Sweden, FI’s parents live in Canada. As we are getting married in Canada my future inlaws came over to visit us in the UK and we took a trip over to Sweden together so that they could all meet. It only seemed fair to us as my family is spending money on flying to Canada for the wedding.
It looks like you have quite a bit of time before your wedding, and as both your families are in Europe, I suggest taking your parents to England to meet his family as well as see where they live/come from etc. Then they can return the hospitality in the days running up to the wedding. It worked really well for us and our families now communicate via email and are getting to know each other a bit better that way. They are all much more excited and relaxed for the wedding as they have already met and know they get along. Takes some of the pressure off.
Post # 11
My FILs and my parents haven’t really met either. FMIL and FSIL came with Mom and I to a wedding show a couple of weeks ago, so they met then, and it went well. We are having an engagement party next month, and everyone will be meeting then. It’s a bit stressful, actually. I can’t believe we made it this far without getting everyone together! :s Skype is a great idea, as they can “meet” without dealing with the distance. Then, if they get along, they can keep Skyping. 🙂
Post # 12
@MrsGo: I just had to write a line to you! My family’s in Sweden, where we’ll get married, but we live in Ontario where my FI is from! 🙂 So far, I must admit that this entire “planning a wedding from afar” is a lot more challenging than I thought! How about you?
@xoxClairexox: Flight tickets to major European capitals tend to be very cheap, could you get all parents to agree to a weekend in Paris? Alternatively, could you suggest that you celebrate Christmas together?
Post # 13
Skype seems like an great solution (is there a language barrier?) – unless your parents really want to go to Italy and are capable of traveling – you will have to ask them if they would like that.
Otherwise, if they do plan on going to your wedding, just wait until then for everyone to meet.
My mom and my husband’s parents have never met – and we are currently married already. I don’t think the parents will ever meet and they are all in the United States! I tried to get them to meet for a wedding, but my mom was not cooperating.
I was married 11 years ago, and my parents never met the ILs then either and they were all in the US as well.
Yes, it is a little odd to me. I think the oddities fall on my side unfortunately.
Post # 14
My parents and fi’s parents have never met. I think they’ll get along, although my parents are kind of laid baid, take it slow kind of people, while fi’s parents are RUSH RUSH RUSH RUSH WALK AS FAST AS YOU CAN!!
My parents are pretty good about playing nice if they don’t like people though, so I’m not worried. Sometimes I can’t even tell when they like or don’t like people because they treat them the same.
Post # 15
- Wedding: September 2013 - Ontario, Canada
@eocenia: No way!! We’re doing the opposite then! Where on Sweden are you from? Where in Ontario are you guys? i am finding it easier than I thought it would be but some things like cake are proving difficult as I can’t try it myself. My FMIL is great and is helping with that though. PM me if you want, would be fun to chat some more 🙂
Post # 16
I had the same concern (US and Australia). Our parents hadn’t talked on the phone or anything before meeting two weeks prior to the wedding, and they got along just fine! Don’t stress too much — it will work out!