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hopefully non-offensive wording for no children in the inviation

My photographer sucks, but I can't fire him

posted 4 months ago in Photography
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    1.
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    Sugar bee
    Bostongrl25    December 2017  

    Long story short, my FI's dad is a professional wedding photographer. His work is really beautiful and we are SO grateful that he offered to pay for the wedding photographer as a gift to us. Since he is an expert in the field, we took his advice when he suggested we use his second shooter. We met with him for dinner about 5 months and things were ok. He was nice, but I didn't really have any type of connection with him. I am SUPER uncomfortable in front of a camera and he didn't seem like the type that would make me less nervous. Like I said, he was nice but just really quiet. He also didn't bring a portfolio which annoyed me, but I brushed it off (I know...red flag).

    At that time FI's dad discussed the rate with him and said he should draw up a contract. It's been 5 months and we have nothing. My FI has emailed him about a contract and he keeps saying "yup..i'll send it soon". And we get nothing. It's just making me nervous and I have a bad feeling.

    I feel really stuck. I know how lucky we are to have our photographer paid for, but he just seems really unreliable. I'm stuck though because he works closely with FI's dad. If this continues I'll have FI talk with his dad, I am just worried if we wait too long we wont be able to find a good photogrpaher. It seems like vendors book up so quickly around here. Ughhh

     
    2.
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    Bumble bee
    ohmybears48    September 28, 2013   Chicago, IL

    I would bring this up with FI's dad. As a photographer, he should totally understand professionalism and the crunch many brides should understand. I am guessing you dont want to start any drama with your FFIL, but if you dont get this out now, there will be drama down the road when your photographer doesn't come through.

     
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    Busy bee
    Crabbabs    September 8, 2012   Madison, Wisconsin

    If you guys can afford a photographer yourself, I would suggest meeting with a few and talking with them about your situation. You can give them your date and ask that they contact you if anyone is planning on booking that date. That way you could make a decision if that time comes. 

    I know it will be hard, but if you and your FI talk to your FFIL very factually and say you are worried about not getting a contract yet, worried about his relationship with the photographer complicating things, and that you didn't really click with the photographer. IMO, piece of mind will be SO important on your wedding day. 

     

     
    4.
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    Sugar bee
    Bostongrl25    December 2017  

    Unfortuently we can't afford the photographer ourselves anymore. We created a very strict budget when we started planning, and there isn't much wiggle room. Especially for something as expensive as photos. We would have included it in the initial budget, but since FI's dad said it was a gift, we left it out.

    I will have FI talk to his dad if we dont hear anything in a few weeks.

     
    5.
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    Buzzing bee
    ladyartichoke       UK

    Like PPs I don't think there's anything wrong with bringing this up.  Even go as far as to say, "he seems nice but he doesn't instill confidence in me and he makes me (more) nervous."

     
    6.
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    Busy bee
    Crabbabs    September 8, 2012   Madison, Wisconsin

    @Bostongrl25: I see. Tough situation! Hopefully your talk will go smoothly and you'll be able to figure it out. 

    Is it possible that the photographer is giving FFIL a steep discount or even doing it as a favor and therefore not taking it as seriously or making it a priority?

    Your concerns are definitely valid, so I hope it works out!

     
    7.
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    Sugar bee
    serabell    May 22, 2010   Oregon

    I would talk with your FI's dad this week, don't wait! Has your FI's dad paid him yet?

     
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    Newbee
    MrsTrue    December 2011  

    if you do end up looking for another photographer in the boston area, i suggest sarah phillips photography and justine yandle photography.

     

    i think FI should  talk to his dad about this. thats the best and most direct thing to do.

     
    9.
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    Busy bee
    elysion    August 17, 2013   Chicago, IL

    I agree with everyone else, have your FI talk to his dad.  His dad might have other recommendations after hearing that you're not happy with his second shooter.  It is worth a risk to have pictures that you love with a photographer you trust.

     

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