- 5 years ago
- Wedding: November 2013
I will be turning 30 on April 14th of this year, and a few weeks ago, I had a major meltdown over it. I felt that I hadn’t accomplished anything and would be doomed to a life of loser-dom/train wrecks/complacency/etc.. I was depressed that I
1) didn’t have a house,
2) wouldn’t have my Masters until this August,
3) wasn’t married (I figured I would be married by now – was always under the impression that it came easy…obviously that changed, lol), and
4) I wasn’t living somewhere where I could see myself settling down (like at all!).
I cried and cried for one night then I moved on after I realized I needed goals to get me back on track. One goal at a time otherwise I get overwhelmed. My first goal was to take and do well on my mid-term in my Masters class, which I did. 🙂 Then my next goal was to finalize my CPA paperwork and take the dreaded California Ethics exam I’ve been putting off for oh, two or three years. I just passed the Ethics exam this past Sunday, so I am feeling revived and motivated!
Just yesterday, I was cleaning out all my clutter in my work cube, and it hit me:
Just meeting my goals of doing well on my mid-term and finally (!!!) conquering the CPA Ethics beast have helped me see turning 30 in a new way. Turning 30 could be great, because it’s what I love: a whole new blank slate to work with. I have an entire new decade to improve myself and stop making the same stupid mistakes I made in my 20s. I can’t say I’ll never make mistakes, because that is not true, but I can definitely not make the same stupid mistakes I made in my 20s and instead can really set the foundation to grow in my life and really prosper.
I think some people get depressed over turning 30, because they equate it with a death sentence or a capstone year where it’s be all/end all. That should not be the case at all. If you allow it to be the case, of course you will be depressed and have a meltdown, etc.!
To celebrate my 30th year with a bang and a really clean slate, I have been decluttering and cleaning up my life. It felt so good to throw out my past class paperwork and the masses of Ethics paperwork! I feel that with less clutter, I can be more focused and reach my goals more easily, which brings me to another point.
That point is: I’m not sure about other signs, but Aries (my sign) NEEDS goals. Whether we are 10 or 65, we thrive on goals. If we don’t have goals, we get ridiculously lazy/complacent and ultimately disappointed in ourselves and our lives. I was a good student growing up. Why? Because my teachers organized my goals for me. They had a curriculum, and I followed it. Same thing with college, I had my course curriculum and syllabi and followed those. Again, goals were made for me. Despite being miserable, I also did well professionally at my first job at a Big 4 public accounting firm b/c the HR group took charge of my career/assigned my clients/monitored my performance/etc.. It wasn’t until I was in less organized/structured companies, that I started feeling very lost. I need to instill goals myself now, otherwise I will not succeed. This is a valuable nugget I will take into my 30s with me. And one of my major goals this year is to move away with my SO from our current area to a place where we can settle down/buy a house/start a real life/etc..
But yeah, turning 30 is NOT a death sentence. If anything, it’s the prime time to start anew and fresh. The 20s were for stupid mistakes from which I learned. I’ll definitely make mistakes in my 30s, but hopefully I won’t be repeating my 20s shenanigans. 🙂
I know this is long, but I e-mailed this to a friend of mine, and she loved my approach and suggested I blog it somewhere. I figured I would post it here first. Maybe it will help some bees when they reach their “dirty 30.”
Anyone else in similar shoes, please comment! I would be glad to hear your takes!