Post # 1
A while back, I shared pics of my venue, which is brand new. It opened in June and is owned by one of the most expensive wedding planners in town (she quoted me $6,500 for her flat fee, but 10-12% of total budget as her fee to a friend of mine). Anyway, the place is beautiful.
Almost everyone who has gotten married there has been a client of hers. The budgets seem to be incredible. I’m guessing these are easily $50-70k weddings. Every time a photograher in town posts pictures from a wedding there (and there have only been 3 so far), I get this horrible feeling, like my little wedding is going to look stupid in this place. Our budget is by no means tiny (about $20-22K), but I imagine the others who are getting married there are spending more on flowers than I am on feeding my guests.
I’m a design blogger and I already have had people comment on how they know my wedding will be amazing because I like interior design and decor. Um…yeah, I love it, but that doesn’t mean I have $50k to install all these amazing things in my wedding.
🙁 I’m feeling horribly inadequate right now.
Here’s the first wedding I saw. They used the standard chairs that come with the place, but the huge floral arrangements were brought in for the couple and the aisle runner has some sort of platform under it so no one sinks into the ground. I was impressed.
The wedding that just got posted today is stunning. The couple actually brought TREES into the venue. The standard cereomony chairs must not have been quite right because they rented different ones. They also rented all sorts of different tables…the only ones that come with the place are standard, round tables. And the lighting package…well, I think that’s about $3-5K right there.
Post # 3
I’m dying…this is unbelieveable!!!
It looks like a buffet style dinner, though…do you all agree?
Post # 4
While those weddings certainly are beautiful, I think yours will be equally beautiful in its own way. There are so many weddings I could compare ours too, we didn’t do a ton of details, and I could beat myself up all day with some of the amazing stuff I see, but in the end, it was our wedding, and it fit us. As long as you stay true to yourself and are happy with what you bring in, then I don’t think yours will look any less gorgeous than those others 🙂
Post # 5
Don’t lose perspective here! This isn’t about wowing the guests, this is about celebrating your committment to each other. It wouldn’t matter if you had a $100 budget or a $100k budget. You are still doing that. That being said I totally understand where you are coming from. I have been getting a lot of those comments to. I planned many peoples weddings that were fab, unique, to die for. Can I do this? Yes! Can I do this on my budget? No! 🙁 A lot of people seem to have the idea this will be the wedding of the century. Sorry to tell them I am having a fun/casual wedding in the park. I have to keep telling myself that their expectations are their problem not mine. My wedding will be great because the man I am marrying is great. So what if we don’t have a wedding that meets everyones unrealistic expectations!
Post # 6
@secondchances: “Can I do this? Yes! Can I do this on my budget? No!”
Exactly. People actually think I make money from blogging, which supplements my regular job. Or, that I get better deals than everyone else. I wish! It’s just a hobby!
Post # 7
I hear you! Alot of people think I must get the best deals or vendors will work for free because it will give them more business in the long run. I wish! It might happen if I was getting married in an area where I plan weddings but I live in an area where no one has money and a typical wedding budget is around $1000 total. So nope, not going to happen! Do I wish I had a bigger budget? Some days but I also want my dream house and don’t want a ton of debt! Besides the people who have the highest expectations know what they pay me. They should realize that I can’t have that kind of wedding if they are paying me so little. Not complaining. I wanted to job for my portfolio so I deliberately low bid. But lets get real people!
Post # 8
@Jeannine @ Small Chic:
I was “WoWed” by the original photos of the venue that you posted. I think the place is just sooo gorgeous on it’s own. To me, these photos look “over the top” and cover up the simplistic beauty of what the venue already has.
Post # 9
Oh – that’s rough!! Those weddings look really beautiful. But – first of all – I’m sure not many of your guests are browsing wedding websites and won’t be comparing you wedding with others. Secondly – I’m sure there are things that you are doing that many guests will think are super neat or original and just don’t seem that special to you. People will love your wedding and so will you!!
Post # 10
I actually looked at a lot of the venues in Charlottesville, including the vineyards/wineries (my FI lives in Richmond, I live in Blacksburg) and they were completely out of my range. But the nice thing about them is the natural beauty of the places. I agree with the PP. The wedding you posted is lovely, but IMO, it’s a little overdone. It’s a brand new place, why do you need draping everywhere? And to me, fancy lighting isn’t needed. I know there is just some beautiful natural lighting that comes in that place. It’s like their goal was to be on Style Me Pretty or some other site (which is okay).
Your wedding will be beautiful despite your budget. Don’t worry about what others have done. If you’re in love with some of the ideas, see if you can do them at a smaller scale.
Post # 11
@Jeannine @ Small Chic: I dont think the venue needs any real work on your part to decorate I wouldnt be worried if i was you. It will be great!
Post # 12
Let’s be serious here. There is nothing special at all about the decor for the first wedding. Two flower arrangements, an aisle runner and some petals should not inspire fear into the hearts of any bride getting married at the venue in the future.
Yes, the second wedding is pretty. But all those elements could also easily have been DIY. We never know what people have access to. Maybe the bride’s parents own a garden center.
I think we all need to stop comparing weddings as if somehow that makes a difference in the marriage.
Post # 13
@julies1949: I didn’t think anyone was insinuating that the design and decor of the space had an effect on the marriage. That would be a really strange thing to say!
That second wedding couldn’t have been DIYed easily. Unless you make a habit of transporting mature trees! The floral designer involved routinely has weddings in Martha Stewart Weddings and Weddings Unveiled. She’s pretty amazing…far more skilled than any of us doing a DIY project.
Post # 14
honestly, it’s the venue that’s gorgeous… not all the other “stuff” that’s added on. i think we often get wrapped up into the muchness of everything, and really more isn’t always better. let the beautiful venue be the focus, not all the decor that’s added in. if seeing these makes you twinge with jealousy, remind youself that you don’t need to spend a ton of cash to have a fabulous wedding day.
Post # 15
@Jeannine @ Small Chic: it takes awhile but eventually you’ll get over the envy and find a clever way to pull it all off. If you don’t have the money but you have the eye, you’ll be able to do something that is super cool. Use what you have and what you can borrow vs. what you can rent. Living in L.A. has taught me how to be scrappy. Write down what your desired vision is and then try to think out of the box. Venue rental can be a real killer so try to think out of the box. 🙂
Post # 16
I mean… it’s pretty but I wouldn’t go all ‘wish it were mine’ over it. Your wedding’s going to be gorgeous!! Don’t fret.