My wedding is in 7 days and my grandmother had a stroke

posted 2 years ago in Emotional
Post # 2
Member
635 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: March 2016 - Ceremony and Reception: Historic mansion on the water

I have not gone through this but I wanted to say that it is great that your grandmother is doing better and I hope her rehab is successful.  I can’t imagine the emotions you are going through right now and so close to your wedding.  I say take a day or two to collect yourself and visit with your grandmother assuming she is near you if you can. Prioritize what projects get done.  If you are offered help take it and what doesn’t get done just doesn’t get done.  Your grandma would want you to be happy and not sad on your wedding day.  I am sure you know that.  She made it through the stroke which is a big thing.  Believe that she will be ok and so will you.  Wishing you the best for your wedding day.  

Post # 3
Member
1287 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2015 - Chapel on Base

I am so sorry.   I do understand your pain.  My grandmother is still the greatest lady that has ever lived.  I know my grandmother would want me to enjoy myself and have a beautiful day.  I am sure your grandmother would too.  I hope you find some way to not  “worry” about your grandmother on your special day.  Give her a hug, give her a kiss, and tell her you love her and hopefully you make a point to show her how beautiful and happy you are on your wedding day. 

Post # 4
Member
470 posts
Helper bee

Sorry that this has happened to your grandmother and you.  I’m sure even though she can’t come to your wedding that she will still want you to have the best day, and not to be sad that she isn’t there with you.  Is the hospital close by to you? Would you be able to go in before your ceremony and surprise her in your dress? I’ve heard of people doing that.  If not, enjoy the day knowing that she will be wishing you all the best and you can share your photos or video with her after.  Or you could get someone to take phone or laptop into her room and skype quickly on the morning so she can see you, but that may take a bit of organising.  All the best for your wedding 🙂

Post # 7
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

HeartsandSparkles:  oh honey, I’m so sorry. I was that close to my grandma too. We lost her last year and I’m still heartbroken. I don’t have advice, really, except even though this isn’t what you planned and you’re scared, she wants you to be joyful, so try to find a way to enjoy it.

Maybe you can skype it for her too? Or at least video it to show it to her and you can watch together? I would definitely carry something of hers with you down the aisle. 

Since she is so far away maybe you need to plan a visit, even if it’s months away.  I’m so sorry you’re going through this. Hugs.

Post # 8
Member
497 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2015

How are you doing now?  How is she doing?  

 

I think she would want you to go ahead and have a lovely day.  Then go and see her when you can.  

Post # 9
Member
135 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Go to the hospital and redo the ceremony for her. I bet she love love it! Or maybe see if she can come just to the ceremony. I am glad she is doing okay.

Post # 10
Member
913 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: November 2014 - 11/15/14-Vineyard

HeartsandSparkles:  I’m so sorry you are going through this. I’m glad to hear she is still alive. That is something to be so great full for. I too, am getting married next week and my mother has had multiple strokes. It does take some therapy as my mom lost the mobility in one leg and of course her left side of her face is drooped. It has slowly come back in time. Her speech is a lot slower but she’s doing good. She has had a few mini strokes since then too. 

My point being that, focus on the positive!!  At least your grandmother is still alive and will be around for you to see and talk to. She may or may not be able to travel by the end of the week (if this was in the plans already). You know in your heart of hearts that she truly wants to see you happy and smiling and knows you will be beautiful on your wedding day. If she won’t be able to be there, have a pic of her on a charm on your bouquet or a pic on a chair full well knowing she is thinking about you. 

Post # 11
Member
1009 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2015

HeartsandSparkles:  I’m so sorry you’re going through this so close to your wedding. My mom had a pretty major stroke almost a year ago so I know how scary and stressful it can be. If you could visit her after the wedding to show her pictures and videos I’m sure she would love that. If you have any question about the recovery process or need to vent feel free to PM me. 

Post # 12
Member
4584 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: May 2016

I’m so sorry you’re going through this. 

I’ve been through similar, just not as close to my wedding. My mom died when I was 11 and my dad died when I was 16. My grandfather raised me and was the most important person in my life. He had a stroke last September and went down hill after that (not to scare you). He did not go to the hospital or tell me about it until a month later so he did not get the care he needed, unlike your grandmother. I’m still in college and was his care giver for the past year. The hardest year of my life. I was in Hawaii on vacation and got engaged Aug 15. Our flight left Hawaii Aug 16 and because of the time difference, shortly after our flight left, he passed away. I never got to tell him we were engaged.  Then only a short 2 months later, my FI’s grandfather passed away. 

It’s going to be hard not to have them at our wedding, but I know they will be there in spirit. Find a way to incorporate something that is special to her. I like the idea of watching the video with her, that way she can still be included. I bought my dress before we were engaged and had pics made with my grandfather, and also FI’s grandfather. They were so happy to be able to see me in my dress, even though they won’t be there for our big day. I’d plan a trip to see her whenever you can. I also love the idea of redoing the ceremony at the hospital! Again, sorry you have to go through this.

Post # 14
Member
6892 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2015

HeartsandSparkles:  if she’s in rehab or hospital, they might be able to assist you in video conference. 

Post # 15
Member
1272 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

HeartsandSparkles:  I’m sure that someone at the hospital or rehab center would help you set up a video conference! She would love that.

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