Post # 1
I guess it’s just the lack of formal weddings in FI’s family that leads them all to believe I’m moving too fast. My family is more open and all gung-ho about my wedding plans and the things I’m doing. FI’s family just seems really annoyed. EVERY time I buy something or do something for the wedding, I hear, “You did that already?” or, “You still have plenty of time!” It is driving me crazy. I could see why they’d say this when I was a year or more out. But I am nine months out. That is NOT a long time (sorry, don’t mean to frighten you ladies!). I have witnessed the engagements of several family members. They’ve all just gotten married in the last weeks. I am perplexed at how fast their time went by. I remember them announcing their engagements like it was yesterday, and they all say the same thing.
My goal was to have all of my silk florals purchased by year’s end. That way, I will have from January to July to put away for the reception dinner. I had a coupon for Michael’s, so Friday I went and got the stuff to make BM bouquets. FSIL just kept saying, “You’ve got plenty of time.” Because I was stressing over what flowers I should put in my bouquet. I could’ve punched her. I can’t stand her anyway, so that was just adding to it. When I told FCIL I had made the BM’s bouquets, she said, “You already bought them?” Ughh! Yes, I already bought them!
When everyone knows I’ve got my dress they flip shit. Wtf is that about!? So, basically everyone wants me to wait until the last two months and hastily throw some mediocre wedding together. Umm, I’m sorry, but my wedding is NOT going to be mediocre. It is my one and only day!
Anyone else dealing with this STILL!?
Post # 3
Screw them! ha. Your doing fine. I’m surprised your not snappy already. It is beyond irtating. We each are working at the pace we choose. Mine is after yours and I have a lot done. Im not trying to drop a fortune right before. Id rather spend early while I can.
Keep on trucking!
Post # 4
Thank you! I am trying to space out finances. I don’t have a lump sum to spend on stuff. Yeah, I could save and just spend it all at once, but that is stressful. I find things that I like and I buy them. There is no guarantee I will find those same things again closer to the wedding. Like, right now, all summer silk florals are on sale. Why wouldn’t I buy them? Geez!
Post # 5
I completely agree with you.. I am like this too, I have been to soo many weddings that looked like they were just thrown together at the last minute, I want mine to be something special! So don’t listen to them!
Post # 6
lol, I am in the same boat as you are. I have my venue, photographer, dj, & officiant booked. I have my BM’s dresses, I have all of their jewellery made, save the dates done, invitations finished except for the final insert with the times, and almost all of the decor done. Once I started DIYing I just couldn’t stop. I want to have everything done so that I get to enjoy the time leading up to the wedding and not stressing out about the little things. So I say GO FOR IT! and have fun 🙂
Post # 7
People have said this to me too! Even when I went looking for a dress 11 months out, the consultants at the stores were like “Oh you have PLENTY of time!” which yeah, I did, but they seemed to not want to take me seriously when I was looking just becuase my wedding was 11 months out. I ended up getting my dress 7 1/2 months out, and it was almost too late! Don’t let them discourage you! The more you get done now, the less stressed you will be later!
Post # 8
Don’t listen to them! It’s always best to get things out of the way. The sooner the better in the case of a wedding or any other big party.
I had an ex-friend who liked to say the exact same things, but after she got engaged she started planning things at a faster rate than I was.
Post # 9
People did the same thing to me. I started planning my wedding over a year before our date. I think it’s awesome that you’re on the ball and taking care of business! Have fun and enjoy it girl!
Post # 10
There is a very easy solution to this. Just don’t talk to them about it. You need to do things on the schedule that works for you, and it really doesn’t matter if they agree or they get it. It’s not their place to have an opinion. But since you don’t like the way they are reacting… just don’t bring it up, and then you don’t have to deal with their attitude.
Post # 11
Thanks guys! I really appreciate the support and understanding here. I am just soo fed up with being told I am doing things early. Everybody in my family is like, “You haven’t done ___ yet?! You better get going, girl!” Because we have more experience with stuff like this. Everything I tell FI’s family gets a negative repsonse, especially from FCIL. I reserved my wedding venue at the dead end of August. Which was 10.5 months before the wedding. I actually consider that to be late on reserving a venue, seeing as how spots were filling up fast. FCIL said, “Did they not say anything to you about doing it so early?” I was just like, huh? I see people reserving their venues two, sometimes even three years, in advance. How is ten months too early?!
Oh well, in the end I’m gonna have a nice wedding and be less stressed. So, I will keep forging on!
Post # 12
Girl, I wish I’d had 9 months to plan mine! Or even a year! What’s funny/annoying right now is NOW everyone is asking what they can do to help…with less than a month to go! I’ve got almost everything covered so there’s really nothing left!
Post # 13
I’m 7 months away and still hearing I’m doing it too soon and have plenty of time. I tell you what – I’ve been engaged 9 months already and it took me all of those 9 months to get done what I’ve already done. Thank god I still have some time left to finish the details, or else I’d be an insane person.
Post # 14
Heh, the only reason I’d tell you to relax, is to make me feel better about the fact that I’m behind the ball on planning! It’s awesome if you are ahead of things – just don’t tell them what you’re doing to avoid those reactions (and be happy about saving money buying things on sale/coupons).
Post # 15
@KristenGotMarried: I hear you on that! I’ve been planning since like February and I still don’t know what I’m walking down the aisle to. I’ve been grappling with the decision this long. Yeah, something that little has been ongoing for eight months! People just don’t get it, I don’t think. Not unless they’ve planned a more formal wedding, themselves. FCIL’s wedding was thrown together in four months, so everyone expects mine to be the same. The difference in her and I is that I am not trying to beat anyone down the aisle. I am taking my sweet time in planning during my comfortable 1.5 year engagement, so that my day will be memorable and not full of regrets.
Post # 16
Some people dont realize how much time goes in to planning a nice wedding. Speaking of silk florals from MIchaels they have a tons more types of flowers right after christmas and they are much cheaper than too so i dont know if thats too late for you to wait.