(Closed) my wedding party is falling apart long rant

posted 6 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: what is the best option
    let them bring dates and watch the drama unfold : (5 votes)
    33 %
    be mean and say no date be uncomfortable around your ex all night : (2 votes)
    13 %
    offer to buy their dresses and kick them out of the wedding party : (5 votes)
    33 %
    do nothing i am over-reacting let the cards fall as they may : (3 votes)
    20 %
  • Post # 3
    7776 posts
    Bumble Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    I think you should drop the two ex gfs and have an uneven wedding party. (Or demote 2 guys to ushers). Buy their dresses off them so you won’t be out of pocket. If you only know these girls through their exes, they’re not really your friends so it doesn’t make sense to keep them.

    Keep your best friend as Maid/Matron of Honor. It’s nice that Future Sister-In-Law is helping, but Maid/Matron of Honor is for best friend, not the girl who helps the most.

    p.s. Sorry about your other best friend, that’s awful 🙁 🙁

    Post # 4
    11273 posts
    Sugar Beekeeper
    • Wedding: April 2012

    you don’t need even sides.  just have who you want to stand up with you. 

    like pp said, if you have to buy back a dress, then do it to save the drama.  it’s tough when they want to bring dates so i would try to eliminate the ex’s unless they are really close to you.

    Post # 5
    1375 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: September 2012

    I think you might cause more drama by kicking them out of the wedding party than by not allowing them dates.  Are these ladies in relationships?  If so, it is good form to allow them to bring the dates, especially since they are in the bridal party.

    I am very, very sorry about your friend.  I cannot imagine how horrific that must have been for you.

    Post # 6
    967 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: October 2012

    @DeniseUCF:  If your budget allows, then let the bridal party bring dates. If not, there isn’t much to do about that. You don’t need even sides, but I wouldn’t kick out the ex-gfs unless you have good reason. As far as dates, we are letting the bridal party bring dates, and then anyone in a serious relationship, such as living together, married, or engaged cn bring their SO.

    As far as the alcohol flowing and drama ensuing… it isn’t your problem. Wedding planning is stressfull and it’s easy to add more worries to the stockpile. If someone is being ridiculous and out of control, ask someone to get them to leave. Don’t make your decisions based on worrying about “what could” happen. 

    Post # 7
    479 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: August 2012

    Well one move up the person that’s helping you the most. I had to do that in my wedding. One of the girls that have paid for he dress and still wants to be around for keep her, but let her know she need to step it up. Sometimes all it takes is a talk. Now if the talk doesn’t work put’em out. It’s your day and small or big it’s about you and your soon-to-be husband

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