Post # 1
I am in need of some serious help at this point, and I really hope someone can relate to this. After being 19 days late for my period, and feeling funny, and not like myself, I decided to take a pregnancy test. After 2 and a half years of TTC I became quite hopeless. I was also diagnosed with endometriosis and was quite confident that I was infertile. I made an appt with an OB/GYN and have been waiting over a year for this appointment. This appointment is finally tomorrow – which we were going to discuss options for me. Well now, I am pregnant. The test was positive last night. I cried so much, I did not know what to do with myself. I did my due date estimation, which is October 20th. I am getting married December 7th. I knew if there was a slight chance I could get pregnant, it would be my luck that it would be now. I am terrified, scared, sad, angry, upset, nervous, self conscious, but happy and not knowing how to show it. My FI wanted soo bad to be happy last night, but I jut cried. We have wanted this for a long time, and I know I should be happy. I have been looking forward to getting married my entire life, and this is not how I envisioned it. I now have to worry about working my butt off to lose weight (which always goes straight to my face), I have to worry about what I will do with the baby, and I can not go on the honeymoon I have always dreamed about. I am torn, and have been crying so much, although I know I should be happy (which like I said I am but I am so in shock and in disbelief that I can not show it)
If anyone has had a baby, that is around 5’1” and around 105lbs, please help. I am soo concerned about weight gain, and I have already baught the dress of my dreams. Is it safe to bring a baby that young to a wedding? How do I do this??
Post # 3
First of all, congratulations! I think you might still be in shock, and that’s why you’re having these feelings. I’m sure it will all feel better in a few days when you’ve had some time to let it sink in.
As for losing the baby weight, fitting in your dress, getting the honeymoon you had dreamt of… I understand those things are important too. Can you postpone the wedding for a few months?
Post # 4
Wow, after trying for 2.5 years, I can’t believe that it could possibly be a nightmare. Congrats! You’re pregnant.. you’re going to have a baby, be a mother for a little life. The wedding is just a day. You say you’ve been looking forward to getting married? Well, you’ll still be married after your wedding! The honeymoon is just a vacation. You can take one later. Since you arleady have your dress, what if you did bridal shots asap, before you start to show? What about a quick ceremony with you and your FI so you can get the couple shots you always envisioned and then have your celebration in Dec?
Post # 5
@eocenia: Thank you. Unfortunately because the city I live in is quite small, and options are limited, everything is very booked up solid upwards of 1-2 years in advance. Due to that, it is not an option. I thought about these kinds of things, should this in my wildest dreams happen, but I can’t do it.
Post # 6
- Wedding: November 2013 - St. Augustine Beach, FL
Whoa, you should be looking at this as a blessing since you have had such trouble TTC with the endometriosis! Take a deep breath, smile, you’re going to be a mommy! Give it a few days to sink in and then worry about the wedding. You have plenty of time to figure out if you will need a different dress after you have the baby.
You can a) postpone the wedding for a few months to give yourself time to lose some weight; b) bump up the wedding and get married before the baby is born and do the honeymoon as a babymoon before the baby is born; c) keep the wedding date you already have and find another dress (or hope you can fit back into it after the baby; it does happen and my stepsister was proof; back in her size 2 jeans within 2 months of giving birth.)
P.S. Yes, you can bring a newborn to a wedding. It will just change your focus on the wedding day because either you or someone you trust will need to be watching the baby.
Post # 7
@Lindsay22: try not to stress. it isn’t good for your baby. Put your wedding out of your mind and focus on being healthy and happy so your baby makes it into this world ok.
Post # 9
Hormones!! haha Apparently they start immediately, and I’m sure they’re playing some kind of role in this.
Now, not that I’m TTC but this is also my nightmare, So I am totally with you on this one.
You have sooo many options! So just breathe.
Yes, you can bring a baby of that age to a wedding. Not a problem. It’ll just sleep wherever you put it, so it’s really the perfect age. But you could also hire a babysitter if you really don’t want to have to worry.
As for the honeymoon, I know in my family there would be a million people offering to take the baby while we went away (my parents, my in-laws, etc) so that shouldn’t be an issue. The only potential issue is that after having baby you won’t want to leave it. 🙂
Now, for weight gain. You DO NOT have to get super fat during a pregnancy. Seek advice for your OBGYN and do not think you are “eating for two.” Eat healthy and get the nutrition you and baby need, but stay away from the junk you would never eat if you weren’t pregnant. If you do this, and then try breastfeeding (or at least pumping) you shouldn’t have trouble losing a lot of the weight afterwards. Also, make sure to exercise regularly during your pregnancy.
The other option is to postpone the wedding, like a PP mentioned. I had a friend who just did this because she ended up pregnant and her due date was only two weeks before her wedding date. If it will help you to calm down then do what you can to postpone the wedding.
MOST IMPORTANTLY: Take a couple of days to enjoy this with your FI!! Forget about what it all means, and what you have to worry about now. Just be sooo happy with your child’s future father that you are going to be parents and your dream is finally coming true!!! Everything else can wait a few days, it’s not going to make a difference. Congratulations!!
Post # 10
Congratulations, first and foremost. I think you are stressed out right now and need to take some deep breaths. I can’t imagine planning a wedding and then having a baby just a few months before, but you know what? You are a woman, and we are resilent like that 🙂
Step away from the wedding for a little while and focus on this new found joy. Don’t focus on all the negatives. Your dress will fit, and there is a lot a seamstress can do to make it fit. You don’t know how much weight you will gain, you don’t know what you body is going to do after this. It may work in your favor. If you are strong enough, you could ask your doctor about a diet plan while pregnant, so you can try to gain as little weight as possible.
If you do have a baby in October and your wedding is in December, you have enough time to lose the baby weight, but if you are still unsure I would push the wedding back or maybe take a different route and have a reception after baby comes and go to the court house or something.
It will all be ok. Congrats again!
Post # 11
@Lindsay22: Well, then you’ll just have to make the best of that day – and imagine, your little baby will be there to share you wedding day! That’s amazing!
As for weight – I’ve once lost close to 70 lbs myself and I know there’s a lot you can do in a relatively short time frame. Just focus on what you eat – healthy, nutritious food, like meats, fish and vegetables. Stay away from starch and try to consult a PT to figure out when you can start to exercise again.
Post # 12
Just breathe and relax. It will be okay. You are pregnant. You got the child you wanted for so long. Ideal time, not so much, but you wouldn’t have been trying if it wasn’t wanted.
As far as the wedding, you’ll have 7 weeks. If you stay healthy (as in eat healthy, but enough food for you and your baby and work out) and then nurse the baby, you should be fine. You may have a couple pounds, but most people I know bounced back, especially if they were in shape before.