(Closed) Name change completed – not sure I want to stick with it now!

posted 6 years ago in Names
Post # 3
3257 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I would wait until you have been married a bit longer before you make a decision. I decided to hyphenate and have flip-flopped back and forth so many times, sometimes wishing I had not taken his name at all, and other times wishing I had just dropped my maiden name and taken his altogether. It’s a huge, expensive legal ordeal to change it back, so just be SURE you want to if it’s what you decide to do. I think it’s normal to questions your decision; after all, your name is a vital part of your identity. Good luck in making this decision!

Post # 4
2161 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2011

We have the same wedding date, have the same type of last name and it sounds like you’re a teacher too.

On paper, I am Mrs. Smith Jones, but had my students refer to me as Mrs. Jones to make it easier for them.

I figure my double last name is going to be for legal documents and my single last name (his) is who I am socially.

It must be different there, I just have to stop at one place and they change my ID with my marriage certificate.  I would ask that people start calling you both names and see how it works out.

Post # 5
1775 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I have a somewhat similar issue.  I couldn’t give up my maiden name, and have a few reasons for wanting to keep my middle name.  I decided to change to MyFirst MyMiddle MyMaiden HisLast.  I still go by my maiden name at work, but everywhere else, I want to be MyFirst MyMaiden HisLast.  People keep leaving off MyMaiden and it is so frustrating!  Very little of my mail comes to me correctly addressed.  I introduce myself with three names, and put it on everything except stuff it really doesn’t matter- like when I get my oil changed or stupid stuff like that.  

I just keep using my name and when possible to politely point it out, I do.  I try not to let it bother me, but it does.  My suggestion would be give it more time and always introduce yourself by the name you want to go as, and put it on everything.

Post # 6
4046 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

I would tell your friends and relative to use both names, but I’m not sure what else you can do. Try not to let it bother you?  This used to bother me too, people are always mis-pronouncing and mis-spelling my first, last name and my FH’s last name. It is so maddening, but not everyone pays attention to these details!

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