Weddingbee boards

Hi Ladies!

I recently got my wedding certificate and went to the DMV to get a new license. My heart was so heavy and I was really down about it. Don't get me wrong, I love being Mrs. Chu B but I'd been Chu E. for practially all my life. (I got my named changed when in '91 to my father's last name in 1991.) Did anyone else feel sad when they started getting everything changed over to their married name? If you are engaged do you think you'll feel sad when that happens?

Yes! I will feel really sad. I waffle back and forth over to change or not to change. I can't decide! 

@heyitssamyrae:That's how I feel exactly! I've been me my whole life. It feels like I have to discover who this new person is. I know it's not logical, but that's just how I feel. 

I'm getting married in 3 weeks, but the name change thing has been weighing on me since we got engaged.  We're both traditional, so I know I'll change by name, but I love my name as it is.  My last name isn't particularly unique, its actually pretty common, but its who I am.  And I have a pretty sweet signature too, haha.  I wanted to just add my maiden name as a second middle name, as my middle name is pretty special, passed down through the family, but I've been told you have to pick one?!? that makes me sad. 

I'm British and my fiance is Pakistani which means he has a Pakistani surname. I don't feel sad about my name being different but I am pretty sure I will get some looks when Mrs.(name) gets called out and I stand up - like for a hospital appointment or something. Or I might not be believed when I give my name lol. But most of these thoughts are not sad, they're just amusing.

I have known a couple of people who had unusual surnames who decided to keep them to "preserve" them.

i'm struggling with this too - if you ask me yesterday then i'd say i want to change my name to his, today I don't!  I figure I'm going to wait until after I'm married, see how it feels having different names and then if I want to change it I can.  It's hard because I have achieved a lot with my name, so it's written on my degrees (undergrad and postgrad), it's used professionally and it's unusual.  So it's a difficult decision to give up your identity. Also it pisses me off that men tend to not even consider changing their own names unless it is pointed out to them how it shouldn't be assumed women should be automatically expected to!  

But remember you don't have to do it straight away, you can wait a few days/weeks or even years!!  

I'm not changing my name for my own rightious reasons but I can sympathise. I mean, I can't imagine giving up my name at all for any reason, it's something that's always constant in your life!

I'd feel a little sad to lose my maiden name too because of professional reasons, but hyphen is a good way to go about it. I'm also taking my maiden as my middle. My maiden name's super common but hard to pronounce for those who aren't familiar.

But then again I'd have a really godly long name (FI is Thai!) and I'm sooooo looking forward to it, it'll be so amusing hearing people pronounce both our names.

I was a little sad, but I wouldn’t really consider it, well sad.  It was kind of just one of those life changes that hits you even though it’s not the biggest step of the whole process.  Like leaving your college job for a new career after you’ve obtained your degree, having your own apartment instead of one with friends, picking out bedding/paint colors for your bun in the oven, etc.  It’s stuff we all anticipate, and it’s happy stuff, we just fell sad taking the next step ahead because the step behind us made us happy too.  Personally, I would never have chosen to keep my maiden name.  I loved my name, and am incredibly proud of my family, but my husband is my number one family member, not my mom and dad.  It’s not that I love them less, and in fact I really liked that last name, but he’s the man I’m going to have children with, he’s the man I am going to rock next to in a wooden chair years from now, God willing, not my parents.  I’ve been married for two and a half years now, and honestly, if someone yelled at me across the street saying my maiden name, I’d probably think ‘hmm. That’s weird.’ It’s not who I am anymore, I’m his Mrs., and I’m proud to be named by him! Think about all of the people you know that you met after they were married.  Do you even know what their maiden name is?  Would you recognize it?  No.  Is your new last name going to ‘fit funny’ at first, of course it is; but just like that beautiful ring on your finger, it soon becomes part of your everyday life. 
                *to be sure not to offend anyone these are my personal beliefs, and you are more than  welcome to have your own.  I don’t want any backlash on this, and I am not saying this with the    intention of causing others any fluffed feathers. 

Oh Mylanta- I just saw that this is from 6months ago.  Well I’ll post it anyway and hope it might be able to help any bees who are having this problem weigh on their heart.

@lawschool bride:  I am adding my maiden to my middle. My aunt did this as well. I would look into it a little more before you drop the idea. I think it is a great way to combine the old and new.

Like everyone else my maiden name is part of me and I never wan to let that go so having it there is really important to me.

@MrsElopement:  My mom said that too and then my aunt said yes but then you can pass it down to your daughter.  That is was she did.  Just a thought