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I'll be interested to see what people say about this thread. I won't be able to get an epidural because of scoliosis.
Great thread! I'm not planning to have kids for another ten years or so, but if I were to get pregnant tomorrow I know I'd want to go the natural birth route, so I'd love to see the answers to this too!
I don't have kids yet but i plan on having natural births when we do. I can't wait to read the responses you get! & check out the "That Wife" blog. Her birth story is up & she had a natural home birth!
Ok. So, I haven't had a baby myself, but I have 7 nieces and nephews, 3 of which were while my siblings were living with us. So, let's just say I've been around a lot of birth.
My younger sister had her baby the most recent. She had an epidural, and afterwords she has back pain for months. It's one of the side effects.
My mother, on the other hand, had 3 of her 4 children natural. The only one she didn't was her first (my brother) back in the 70's and they did this thing called a "saddle block" that paralyzed her from the waist down for 3 days.
Long story short, she refused any kind of drugs with her next 3 kids. She did just fine.
I would also suggest watching the documentary "The Business of Being Born" if you have Netflix. It's on instant view. The main focus is on midwives and natural birth. It's a very interesting movie, and really affected my desire to go natural when I finally go to have children.
Either way, good luck!
I'd love to see some real responses to this as well. I'm hoping to have a natural child birth as well.
Thanks for starting this thread, I'm curious, too! No kids for me yet, but I'll second tinylittlebird's recommendation for 'The Business of Being Born.' It's a really interesting watch, and while the film definitely has a particular point of view, I think it gives you enough to go on to do some further research. It changed my mind about some birthing practices.
A word of warning, though: you see, err, a lot of Ricki Lake and other mothers in the movie, and it's a honest representation of birth. Not for the squeamish. :)
@tinylittlebird: i definitely third your suggestion! that documentary was what made me decide i wanted to go natural!!
@canuba: OMG! I totally forgot about Ricki! Haha!
Also, I remembered something else I wanted to mention. I had a conversation with my boss about my little sister getting induced/getting an epidural.
My boss went into her first pregnancy 100% certain she would do natural. Due to come complications, she had to induce. And, because of the pain, she had to get an epidural. She said by the time it was all over, she felt drugged up and exhausted.
When she had her second child, she *almost* begged for the epidural, but he came so fast that it was too late to do it. She said after having her second child, she was on such an endorphin high that she said she could have run a marathon!
She said that unless there is absolutely no way around it, that she tells everyone to go natural.
@tinylittlebird: I'm in the same boat here, my mom had 4 out of 5 children naturally, and 3 of them were at home (me included). I watched "the business of being born" as well, and highly recommend it.
I hope to hear some stories from the bees about their experiences, too!
I had a drug-free homebirth last may and it was an amazing experience. I think it would have been a heck of a lot harder to do it in a hospital setting. I didn't find the contractions to be very bad but it was very, very hard work... probably one the hardest things I've ever done. My labor lasted 53 hours and the reason I was able to stay calm and relaxed was because I had fabulous midwives and a very supportive husband, all of whom gave me amazing physical and emotional support. Plus I was in the comfort and privacy of my own home and I could pretty much do whatever I wanted. I'm not going to lie though... the pushing part really hurt for me and I did scream at the end, but it was the last two pushes and then it was over. I would definitely plan another homebirth with my midwives.
I'm interested to hear the responses as well as I've always intended to have a natural birth when we start having kids.
I haven't been through it yet (about 20 more weeks til it's my turn!). I am going to do everything in my power to have a natural birth.
I've watched the Riki Lake film, and while it's a great promoter of natural birth, it's also pretty one sided with some of the statistics and things they say, like babies born via C-Section don't bond with their mothers. (There was another post on here recently about that.)
I would advise any mom to read the Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth. It's a great resource on the pros and cons of all the different drugs, medical interventions, etc... It is extremely informative and didn't seem to be too biased. It goes more specific into a lot of things than books like What to Expect, which I really like.I'm also reading Husband-Coached Birth which is about the Bradley Method of Natural birth.I'm not too far into it yet, but so far it seems very logical and makes sense.
Basically, any single medical internvention you have, from an IV to an epidural, makes you more likely to have a C-Section. Aside from the fact that I don't feel like a giant needle being stuck in my spine, I DON'T want a C-Section unless it's really necessary. And I'm not going to do anything to increase those odds that isn't really necessary, including having an epidural.I don't believe that babies born by C-Section don't bond well, but I don't want to come out feeling drugged up and having to postpone bonding with my baby and getting started breast feeding.To me it just doesn't feel right to be planning on taking steps that would make those things (feeling drugged, having to have a C-Section) more likely. My gut and/or mom instincts tell me that natural is the way to go.
And despite what the Riki Lake film might portray, there are hospitals out there that are supportive of natural birth with minimal interventions for uncomplicated preganncies and labors. I'm thankful that the hospital in my town is one of them, and I have a lot of flexibility in the things I can do to alleviate or at least cope with the pain of natural childbirth.
I say all this knowing full well that my plans might fly right out the window, and without judgement for woman who have chosen differently than I plan to. You don't know what it'll be like until you are in that situation. There a poeple who don't realize they are in labor until they are pretty far along, or who have quick labors. My mom thought she had braxton hicks for about 10 hours until suddenly the contractions got stronger and closer. She made it the 25 mins to the hospital and was fully dilated and 20 minutes later my sister popped out. If I have a quick labor, it'll be a lot easier to stay natural than if I'm laboring for days.
I had one of my children without an epidural, but not by choice. The anesthesiologist had a hard time giving me the epidural and finally gave up after about the tenth(!) attempt. Yeah..that was fun. So we went along without it.
Labor hurts. There's no pretending it doesn't. At first, it's not THAT bad because the contractions start slow, build up, then go away. But as they get closer together, it feels like you never get any rest in between. I'd call labor a 7 or 8. But pushing for me was a 10. That was the most intense pain I'd ever had. But I think part of it was because I pushed for 2 1/2 hours (which I don't think is typical) and ended up with forceps because the baby was just too big. I did have some kind of local down there which helped a little, but that was the worst part.
I'd always planned to get the epidural, but it just didn't work out.
With my first baby, I'd wanted to go natural, but panicked and took the epidural. I actually wasn't all that uncomfortable when it was offered and wanted to wait, but was told if I didn't take it when it was available, I might have to wait a long time for it to be available again and if I had waited too long, I'd not get it. I had just heard a woman screaming bloody murder which scared me to death...so I took the epidural when it was offered.
Not really pressure, but I was told if I didn't take it when it was offered, I might not get one (see above). So I had the epidural before I really felt a need for it.
With the first baby, I had wanted to give birth naturally because it just seemed healthier for both of us and because I wasn't too excited about the big needle involved with the epidural. I'd do natural again if I could be sure I'd have an uncomplicated birth, but as my third was a c-section, I'd definitely go that way if I ever did it again (which I won't)
Personally, as long as everything was progressing normally, I was OK with the unmedicated birth. I did have a bit of something in the IV which helped..but it's only available in early labor. My biggest problem was that I had complications near the end which made things VERY painful and by then it was too late for the epidural.
I think one of the biggest drawbacks to the epidural is that it is often offered before it is needed (because that is when doctor is available or because it is easier for the new mom to hold still when contractions are far apart). With my first uncomplicated birth, I might have been fine without the epidural, but I was afraid to find out, so I took it.
As an aside, if you do get one, don't feel bad. You didn't fail and you aren't a big baby. Everyone has a different pain tolerance and everyone's labor is different. Some women's labors go easily and the pain is manageable. Others have more pain for a variety of reasons. My SIL had horrible pain because the baby was pressing on her spine. I didn't have that at all, so it would be wrong to think I could somehow "manage" the pain better than she could. The nurses told me when I had my son that of those that had the choice of an epidural in time, about 80-90% took it.
1. How badly did it hurt? Scale of 1 to 10 where 1 is a paper cut and 10 is "just give me the sweet release of death." ;-)
Definitely a 10 or higher. It was intense. I was in the 'just make it stop - I don't want to feel this pain anymore - ready to beg for the epi' when they checked me and I was a 9.5 - then I was like 'I can so do this'. I did scream quite a bit - but that was my way to get through the pain and it is what it is. Seriously all I wanted was apple juice afterwards - felt like I'd been screaming through a college football game for hours.
The pushing for me was way easier than the contractions. Granted I only pushed for 15 minutes. I was able to deliver in an alternative position which was on my knees - this was key for me to be able to push. (I was not able to get/feel the correct leverage I needed on my back)
FYI - My active labor (4 cm) started around 4pm. I don't have an exact timeline but I'd guess the pain was intense (almost unbearable) for about 90 minutes. I delivered at 8:33 - so was really only in 'uncomforable' labor for 4.5 hours. I do attribute the speed of my labor to not having any interventions.
2. Was it hard to stick to your natural birth intentions? Did you ever consider getting an epidural?
We had a doula which really helped make it easy to stick to my plan. Yes I thought about the EPI but then I reminded myself the reasons why I had choosen to go natural. It was also great to deliver with a midwife because she was quick to give alt options to get me comfortable.
3. Did anyone pressure you to get an epidural? Before or during labor?
Nope. We had specifically put in our birth plan we did not want the hospital staff to bring up (offer) 'drugs', we knew they were available and would ask for them if we changed our minds.
4. Why did you want to give birth naturally? Would you do it again? Why or why not?
I won't lie - I did want to prove to myself I could do it. In reality - It was WAY harder than I imagined. I also wanted to avoid risks (even though some are small) that come with interventions. Some have great exeriences with epidurals - some don't. I know interventions can also slow down the process. I wanted to be able to move around - which I did. The only time I was on my back in the bed was when they were monitoring the baby or checking me.
5. Anything else!
During labor my thoughts were everywhere - and I doubted I would 'go natural' the next time. But even by the next morning I was like "I could totally do that again". Yes the pain is intense - but once it's over it's over. I would say the 2 weeks of being sensitive down there afterwards was way worse (more annoying).
My husband claimed right after that if I wanted to 'go natural' again he wasn't going to be there :) And joked about his loss of hearing. He's a funny guy :)
The nurse did say if she ever got me again she was bringing ear plugs.
Like I said - I wasn't afraid to scream through the pain :)
I agree with you - there is no 'right' method for giving birth. I suggest everyone researches their options and makes the best choice for them :)
I just want to chime in and say that The Business of Being Born, while very interesting gives a very one sided view. Most OBs in most cities are not the way that they were portrayed in the movie. They picked the most extreme viewpoints to highlight.
Having said that, I did go for the epidural. My contractions weren't so awful. I mean I couldn't walk or breathe through them at the end there, but I was so scared of what might come that I was afraid I'd hold back without the epidural... and I did NOT want a C-Section! So I happily got the epidural and had the birth of my dreams.
At the very end we found out that the baby was OP (sunny side up), so it may have been really hard to have her without an epidural. I've seen lots of women end up with C sections for OP presentation.
I just wanted to share my viewpoint, lest people provide too much weight to a totally interesting but completely skewed movie :)
I am planning a natural birth at home, so an epidural won't even be an option for me (unless we do a hospital transfer, which is not what we want). I just talked to my mom about labor pain last night. She had 3 natural births and said that the pain is just part of life and she was not interested in the epidural for her births. She told me I will do just fine :)
Thanks for all these great stories and opinions. It really is great to hear people with all different experiences. I am hoping to have a natural hospital birth, with a doula, but I am not foreclosing the possibility of an epidual if that seems like the right choice at the time. Thanks all!!!
@ chicagowife - I went in trying for a med-free birth, but after researching my options, I knew I would choose an epidural over other pain meds if I needed something. Turned out, I really did need something, almost right away, too, so I got an epidural. It was definitely the right choice for me, and all the things I was worried about happening with an epidural (i.e effects on the baby, slowing progress, and negative side effects of the meds) didn't happen for me. In fact, my labor was pretty quick (about 8.5 hours) and the doctor said he had never seen such great vitals for a baby during labor; Addie handled it perfectly!
When we have another, I think I'll go into with the same type of mindset: I'd like to go med-free, but if I need something, I'll get an epidural. In the end, whatever you choose, I just hope you have a great birth experience because, meds or no meds, in the end it's all about you and the baby! :)
Also, I really liked Penny Simkin's book The Birth Partner; I think it's the most comprehensive, non-judgemental birth book on the market, and it gives a ton of information on laboring med-free, how to choose meds if you want them, and what kinds of complications/situations might arise during labor/birth.
What Mrs. DG said is very true. The hospital that I am going to allows water birth, you can eat and drink, you don't have to stay in bed, and most moms end up with intermittent monitoring so they can move around. They allow you to labor and deliver in just about any position you want to. If you say you don't want drugs, they'll suggest anything but drugs to help cope with the pain. You don't automatically get an IV, you don't have to have internal exams, and they are more flexible in allowing you to labor longer instead of trying to get you to induce.
My friend delivered at a different hospital a few hours away. After 4 cm, she wasn't allowed to leave her room, and after 6 cm had to stay in her bed. She was only allowed to labor for 4 hours without progressing before they'd intervene medically. She was automatically hooked up to an IV upon being admitted, and was not allowed to eat or drink. They broke her water to speed labor, and then she began having 3-4 back to back contractions with no break, and only 1-2 mins in between those. She got the epidural because she couldn't take the contractions which got much stronger after they broke her water. The epidural slowed down labor, and after 4 hours on the epidural with little progress, they forced her to induce by telling her "you're baby will go into fetal distress if you don't continue to progress". They started a high dose of pitocin, which caused the baby's heartrate to drop. Instead of lowering the dose, they rushed her off for an emergency C-Section.
Unfortunately she didn't do a lot of research before hand and didn't have a plan, however vague. She was in a hospital with a very high rate of medical intervention and C-Section, and had to rely on those doctors to help her decide what to do, which in my opinion isn't really even a decision at that point. They scared her and made her feel as though she didn't have an option. She had a healthy and uncomplicated pregnancy and early labor until they began medical interventions. They didn't allow common practices (non-medical) to relieve pain, like moving, walking, birth ball, shower, etc... and she had no option but to get an epidural. They never talked to her about what the C-Section involved or how long and painful the recovery is. She was miserable and in pain for a month after the C-Section.
There is a lot of variability between hospitals and medical providers. The movie the Business of Being Born does show the extreme examples and makes it seem like those practices are happening everywhere all the time. While that's not true, there are hospitals where it is very true. You need to know the statistics and policies for your dr/midwife practice as well as the hospital you chose to birth in, so that you can make an informed decision.
I think the medical technology that we have today is amazing, and I appreciate it's place in labor/delivery. I just don't think it necessary needs to play a role in EVERY labor and delivery. Everyone should have options, but they should be the patient's choice. It upsets me that there are dr's out there who use fear to make labor/delivery more convenient for them.
Maybe I should start a whole new thread for this but did anyone try hypnobirthing or Bradley method techniques? From things I've read there, the whole "fighting against the birth/pain" that a lot of people mention here actually increases the pain. Just intersted in anyone's experiences with either. I have a little less than 3 months to go for my first one...
We prepared for Bradley, but obviously went a different direction when the time came :)
@mrstilly:FYI I had a c section and was BFing my baby within an hour of his being born! And after the morphine wore off from the surgery I took nothing stronger than Midol....Just don't want anyone who has to have a c section like I did to think otherwise :)
Ditto, DG. We also prepared with Bradley (the book, not the classes) and ended up with an epidural instead.
I'm on my fourth and hopefully the last. My first two were natural. Two hours was the most I felt intense pain and with my third I went in at 9 1/2 cm and right after they checked my cervix I began feeling the pain. But I had been planning an epidural for my third since I thought it'd be the last pregnancy. Unfortunately the anesthesiologist couldn't arrive til 40 minutes later. But I didn't feel a thing after they ruptured my bag or pushing. It didn't make pushing difficult either only took 5 minutes. I'd recommend an epidural if you are over 6-7 cm dilated!
I read an excellent book on different pain techniques during labor:
http://www.easylabor.net/index.html
GREAT book. No biased toward one technique or another. Gives solid facts about various methods (including epis and hypnobirthing). I LOVED that it didn't seem to have a viewpoint other than "Every woman is different, choose what is right for you."
That said, I prepared for a natural birth even though I was decided that I would get an epidural. Just in case I couldn't get one, ya know?
Hypnobirthing: I bought several CD sets. I tried out the techniques while I was waiting for my anesthesiologist. Didn't work. AT ALL. Couldn't seem to ignore the entire "labor" scene I was in.
Warm shower: Our hospital had a shower to use for labor, and the nurses said that it doesn't really get rid of the pain, but it does comfort you. Like how eating chicken soup doesn't cure a cold, but you feel better anyway.
Sounds: Most effective method I found was making ridiculous noises through the contractions. I ignored my embarassment and just pretended I was talking to whales.
Positions: Didn't seem to help, but only tried this for 5 minutes before the big needle man showed up.
Epidural: My SIL told me she felt phantom pain for months after her epi. Scared the crap out of me. But my back was only sore for one day afterwards, and not nearly as bad off as my poor vajayjay. I noticed a soreness, but it went away the next day.
I was just wondering if anyone who had an EPI also ever had a spinal tap? Was getting an EPI similar to having a spinal tap?
If having an EPI is anything similar to a spinal tap I don't think I want to go through that again. I had terrible trouble during and aftermy spinal tap for weeks.
I'll be trying to give birth without epidural, but keeping an open mind just in case. I am reading a Bradley book and taking a birthing class teaching on various methods given by a hospital instructor who is also a doula. She encouraged us on many things-massage, music, aromatherapy, rice pillows, but one of the most surprising was to moan to ease the pain. I think I'll be this 'type' in delivery.
Last year, I saw my friend give birth (5 hours in the hospital) to her second child, without any pain meds. She was a champ, very inspiring. Makes me way less freaked out about giving birth without pain meds, to see someone firsthand, get through contractions through prayer, hubby encouragement and supportive hospital staff. Her mom and I sat there, pretty much quiet most of the time. She did get in a tiny bathroom tub for a little while and walked around quite a bit.
Someone already recommended it, but Mrs. Avocado's blog has a very detailed account of her pregnancy & natural home birth! www.thatwifeblog.com. I am years away from getting pregnant (hopefully!) and I was fascinated by her birth entries.
Side note: While The Business of Being Born is definitely a bit like a Michael Moore movie (clearly interested in only presenting one side of the story), it made a convert of, of all people, Mr. Octo. He's probably asked me four times if I'd like to have a home birth, haha!
@octopus: I think that's a perfect analogy about the Michael Moore movies...but you always have to research choices! While I liked the other viewpoint that was represented in the movie as opposed to what is generally the experience in hospitals, I know that it's one sided.
When I go to have babies (a while down the road) the plan will be to go natural, but I'll see once I really get going! :)
***So heres what worked for me: Bradley Birthing Classes. My husband coached me through the contractions and, compared to my cramps, it wasnt that bad. As far as the actual delivery, that wasnt bad either. Granted, we were dealing with what no parents should deal with, so giving birth is nothing compared to our emotional pain. As far as making it through without medication, I couldve if Moose had still been alive at the time of my delivery. Instead, I chose to take meds because I was hoping that Id be so out of it, I wouldnt feel any emotions. Honestly, the meds did nothing to help me and Im glad they didnt because I was able to be there for my husband.
As for the hospital, at the time of our delivery, they let me do whatever I wanted because there was no longer a concern for Mooses wellbeing. It was all about my husband and myself.
However, the hospital classes I signed up for were horrible. I was told over my concern for the screw looking thing being screwed into my Mooses head that "before this, babies died A LOT!" The teachers hated that I had researched and read things which didnt coinside with their views. At my next appointment, I reported this to my doctor and he couldnt believe what I was telling him. Fortunately, we wrote everything down, so we had proof.
Anyway, do what is right for you and your child. Really, thats all that matters.
***Sorry, I didnt read any of the prior comments because Im still dealing with my loss, so if someone else has said pretty much the same thing, sorry. Also, my birthing method had nothing to do with our loss. Moose was gone before we even got to the hospital.
I'm really surprised at how many people WANT to go au natural to deliver! I never even considered it. Hats off to yall! Right after my epidural my blood pressure/heart rate went down to someones that was having a heart attack, and made me pass out and throw up a few times. I'm still not sure why this happened but it was not fun. So i'm debating a natural delivery for my next. It's good to hear all of your stories when im debating this! We'll see. I had to have an episiotomy and if i have have to have another for my next child i do NOT want to feel that!!
For all you nurses/doctors.. why did that happen after my epidural?
The best thing to do is your research... there are other options aside from going straight to an epidural to help combat pain, natural and medical. I'm hoping to have a homebirth with a midwife {I'm in Canada}, but I still have pain medication options open should I want them {just not an epidural, I'd have to get transfered to a hospital for that}.
This is my first so no idea how I will deal with the pain {and it's different for everyone}, but I think going in with a plan and then being flexible with that plan is the best way to go. And having a doula is a great idea, someone who will advocate for you and the type of birth you want!
I'm just starting to read HypnoBirthing {recommended by a few new-mom friends} and so far it's a fascinating read, with lots of great tips to get over the fear of birth!
I would like to add that if you ARE going for an intervention-free birth, you NEED a birth partner on board to help you through it. That may not necessarily be your DH. It could be a doula, birth coach, midwife, or your doctor. But without support, a first time mom would have a VERY difficult time of this.
The friend whom I was with as she gave non-epidural birth to her second child, said the 2ND one was HARDER than the 1st. Both were without epidural. Another friend of her friend, also said she had a harder time with a smaller second baby than a bigger one (non-epidural). Sometimes it depends on the position/angle of baby.
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Hi ladies!
I am trying to decide if I should (or should try to) have a natural birth, by which I mean no pain medication or epidural while giving birth. I would love to hear from you bees who have done it! Here are a few questions, although they're just conversation-starters...
Thanks, I really appreciate hearing any stories or thoughts on this. I don't think there's any right answer, (everyone should absolutely have the birth experience they want) but I would love to hear about people's experiences!