Need advice about catty coworker.

posted 3 years ago in Career
  • poll: What should I do?
    Confront her about it. : (18 votes)
    47 %
    Just ignore it. : (8 votes)
    21 %
    Go to management and let them resolve it. : (10 votes)
    26 %
    Other (explain) : (2 votes)
    5 %
  • Post # 3
    42117 posts
    Honey Beekeeper
    • Wedding: November 1999

    @ohhbitty:  I would speak to her.  You are the supervisor.I would choose a time when she is due to leave work so that if she gets upset, she doesn’t have to stay at the store.

    I would tell her that I had been informed that she was maligning me to other employees and that if she didn’t put a stop to it, I would be taking the issue to management.  I would emphasize that we needed to work as a team and that kind of divisive behavior would not be tolerated.

    We don’t have to like everyone we work with, but we do have to get along. If she has some personal issue with me the future, I expect her to bring it to me, not grouch to other employees behind my back.

    I would then sit down and make notes about the conversation, so that you could discuss it with some accuracy if you needed to take the issue to management in the future.

    Post # 4
    965 posts
    Busy bee
    • Wedding: January 2014

    I would speak to her but kill her with kindness. “I heard there were rumors going around that I was saying nasty things about you and your boyfriend. I just wanted you to know they aren’t true and I am so sorry that someone said that.” and the like. When you find an opportunity to complment her (nothing fake) then do it, publically. If you say it to her, she may turn it into “Becky was making fun of my clothes” but if you say “I love your shoes!”n (if you in fact, love her shoes)  in front of a coworker, she can’t turn it into an insult without looking like a crazy bitch.

    All in all, keep doing what you are doing. You rock your job and your boss knows it. They usually see through the teenage bull and will likely commend you for dealing with it like an adult.

    Post # 5
    3989 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: October 2011

    Show her how adults behave and pull her aside and talk to her.  I wouldn’t use the word, “confront”. 

    Say something along the lines of,  “Hey xxx, I’ve been hearing a couple of things around the shop and was pretty upset by them.  I wanted to talk to you first before I took them to heart.  Is there something going on that you want to talk to me about?”

    Post # 7
    2878 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    @ohhbitty:  ahaha that sounds like some shit DH would say.  There’s some great advice by PPs 🙂

    Post # 8
    1311 posts
    Bumble bee
    • Wedding: January 1994

    Bravo on going to school FT and working FT! I would ignore the workplace drama. I think sometimes in a professional environment of highly skilled workers there can be issues like you mentioned, but not nearly as often. Coming from my own experience working in retail when I was younger, and eventually getting into a career, here is my opinion: Many folks in retail are younger, and have not developed the work ethic or understand the importance in avoiding those sorts of things. Maybe just consider this experience biding your time until you are out of school and into a career. I would ignore it in the meantime.

    Post # 9
    7286 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @ohhbitty:  Is the close co-worker who told you that this women is talking about you behind your back also the close co-worker that you confide in?

    Post # 11
    4136 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: August 2013

    I would have anyone who overheard her talking about you document it and file a report with HR. Your workplace reputation may suffer from her gossip and lies. It’s not acceptable to behave that way in a workplace and the sooner she grasps that, the better. 

    Post # 12
    3415 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2014 - Lodge

    As a person in management and previously in HR my advice to you is this.  I would bring it up to management but let them know that you want to have a meeting with her and them and that you will let her know how you feel about the situations that are occuring as well as get her “side of the story”.  This way what you say cannot be turned against you, you will have witnesses.  It sounds to me like if you confront her alone she will report something untrue like you yelled at her or whatever.  By making management aware of the situation but letting them know you plan to handle it in a professional way will let them know of the issues with her so they can pay closer attention and will also make you see more responsible and mature so when you do finish school and if you decide to be part of their management team (or even if you become a manager elsewhere) you can show you are able to handle conflicts in a manner that is professional.

    Good luck.

    Post # 13
    7286 posts
    Busy Beekeeper

    @ohhbitty:  That is my point. The person you confide in and the person telling you that the other woman is talking about you behind your back is the same person. So what makes you think she is being truthful? What makes you think she didn’t tell this other woman what you said? Maybe that is why the other woman is talking about YOU because your so called friend told her everything YOU said?

    The woman that you confided in is in all likelihood a pot stirrer and at the very least a terrible gossip.

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