Need Advice: Bridesmaids Haven't Ordered Their Dresses

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
Post # 3
3777 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: February 2013

I think you need to give them a hard deadline, instead of using the word, “soon.” Tell them it must be done by that date.

Post # 4
42089 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: November 1999

@sarahmichelle:  Order them only if you are prepared to suck up the cost if they don’t pay you back.

Otherwise you can sit back and wait to see if they order the dresses in time for delivery and alterations.

Post # 5
227 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: January 2014

@sarahmichelle:  Don’t let it stress you out. If it was March it would be a different story.

Unless there is a chance of the dress or colour becoming discontinued I wouldn’t get too hyped up.

Can you send them another reminder with a solid deadline?

ie. Your dress must be ordered by February 28th 

Post # 6
2465 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: April 2014 - Italian Villa

@sarahmichelle:  First off, deep breath, sister!

I totally understand where you are coming from, but it’s just barely after the holidays- give your girls more time to take the plunge. Maybe they are waiting for their next paycheck? 8 weeks from now would be in March, 3 months before your wedding, so I think there is still time. I would leave them alone for a month and then check in again. 

I know you are worried about delivery times getting longer (I would be, too), but I don’t think you can offer to order them withut seeming pushy. I figure if you remind them again in a month, that would be reasonable. That gives them time to pay off the holidays, and you will still have 16 weeks of lead time. 


Post # 7
705 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sarahmichelle:  I agree with PP that you should give a hard deadline. However, if your profile date is right, then it’s still six months out before the wedding, and if the dresses have an 8-week production time then I can understand why your BMs may not feel like they need to order their dresses right this minute. I do think it’s wise to order in advance in case there are any issues and a dress needs to be sent back, but perhaps it’s just a bit early to be stressing out quite so much? I understand your frustration though!

Post # 8
2792 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2014

I think the suggestion of setting a hard deadline is a must.  I will use the example of our tuxes.  We set a deadline by the end of January in October.  My brother, to my surprise, went in right away.  Two friends got in as well, and we pushed my dad in the store when he was visiting.  We are still waiting on 4 people and we are nervous.  My girls had a deadline of October 10th, as that was the date the store wanted.  Everyone was paid by October 10th. 

Post # 9
22124 posts
Honey Beekeeper
  • Wedding: July 2011

@something_orange:  I agree about the deadline. You could even say that David’s Bridal gave you the suggested deadline if you don’t want to make it sound like you set the deadline yourself.

You still have time, so don’t panic yet. See if you get anywhere with a hard deadline first. 🙂

Post # 11
1194 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2014

I’m having the same issue. I emailed my girls back in October and gave them a hard deadline of February 15. Nobody ordered until after the holidays (fine by me) and then my MOH sent out a reminder. After that, one girl ordered and another said she’d order that weekend (she actually didn’t). So I sent a reminder yesterday saying they only have one month to get their orders in and while talking with them today the remaining three (including the one who said she was ordering hers a week ago) are all like “yeah, we’ll get around to it.” Our place is quoting us 12-14 weeks for delivery so that deadline is serious and I don’t know what to do other than bug them every single day and make them hate me by June.

Post # 12
3756 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

My wedding’s in April… still waiting for at least one or two girls to order. Thankfully DB is quick so hopefully there will be no issues.

Post # 14
2501 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@sarahmichelle:  this happened to my SIL and I was stuck with the bad consequences…maybe relay this to your BMS- one of my SILS other bridesmaids waited almost 3 months to order…

To make a long story short we didn’t get our dresses until 4 weeks before the wedding. Mine apparently had a spot on it so they had to re-order mine and I didn’t get it until 2 weeks before.

I had never tried on the dress ( my SIL ordered it OOT, the wedding was DW) just sent in my measurements and It was really snug around my ribs. If we had more time I would have sent mine back and ordered a size up. But because the one bridesmaid took forever everything was really rushed and I spent a very uncomfortable day at my brothers wedding 🙁 

Post # 15
285 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: December 2013

I think you are jumping the gun. Your wedding is in June? And it takes 8 weeks to get the dresses, so essentially 2 months? Why should they have to order them now? Maybe they can’t afford it right now. I know I haven’t had a paycheck since Dec. 19th because of the holidays (work for the state and we get paid the last working day of each month), so maybe they are waiting on money.


Post # 16
260 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

I think you are still OK with timing, but if you are worried, definitely give them a specific deadline.  If you are concerned with feeling bossy, blame it on the dress shop.  Say that the sales lady said she can’t guarentee the dresses will arrive on time unless you order by XXXdate.  Hopefully they will see that as someone with authority who knows the business is telling them what they need to do, rather than you.  Also, try telling them a deadline that’s earlier than the real deadline… that way you still have some wiggle room even if they are late.

I know the feeling of being worried about feeling bossy.  Some of my friends, while I love them dearly, aren’t exactly timely, on the ball types of girls, so I feel like I’ve had to do a little (or lot) of nudging to make sure things get done on time.  On one hand I know it will get done eventually, but on the other, the stress of worrying over things happening at the last minute is scary!  I like to do everything early to avoid any potential issues.  

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