Need Advice! Fight with Bridesmaid & Need to Order Dresses

posted 3 years ago in Bridesmaids
  • poll: Should She be a Bridesmaid?
    Hell No : (10 votes)
    53 %
    Yes - talk to her and forgive her : (3 votes)
    16 %
    Make it an option - but don't plan things around her : (6 votes)
    32 %
  • Post # 3
    Hostess
    9907 posts
    Buzzing Beekeeper
    • Wedding: May 2014

    @beachrunner26:  she’s outta line that’s for sure…what to do..I don’t know what to tell you.

    Post # 4
    Hostess
    4941 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @beachrunner26: It sounds like she isn’t too much of an actual friend at all. People who hold things like paying for a meal over your head are ones that you just don’t need in your life. I would move on and eliminate her from the bridal party. Focus on people who REALLY want to be there for your wedding. 🙂

    Post # 5
    Member
    2203 posts
    Buzzing bee
    • Wedding: June 2017

    She doesn’t sound like a real friend at all…

    And honestly, she’s just freaking insane if she expected you to split that bonus with her.  That was a perk for working at her old company.  If she wanted to keep that perk, she should have stayed there.

    I wonder how she would feel if the situation was reversed.

    Post # 7
    Member
    5199 posts
    Bee Keeper
    • Wedding: April 2013

    I think you guys need to pick up the phone and talk to each other.  This sounds like texting gone out of control

    Post # 8
    Member
    2826 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @beachrunner26:  So she did this guy a favor, in turned she ask you to do HER a favor. And now she wants payment for her favor, but your favor should be out of the kindness of your heart? I’m confused. Also. This is a sign. I would specifically address with her how petty she sounds bringing up $9 meals from four years ago. After that (and I realize this next part is a bit more aggressive than some people like to get), I’d mention that on second thought, I can see her point that it’s not fair to both keep half the commission AND ask her to come to my destination wedding. To that end, I will keep the entire commission and she does not have to worry about going to the expense of being in or attending my wedding. 

    Post # 11
    Hostess
    4941 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: May 2013

    @beachrunner26:  I wouldn’t not talk to her. Start up a conversation and just say, “I’m sorry, but I just dont’ feel like you are being a good friend to me. Friends don’t hold grudges and they would be supporting me right now…not making it more stressful.” Something to that effect. Either way, just have a heart to heart, calm conversation letting her know that she is no longer invited to the wedding or to be a part of the bridal party. 

    It’ll probably be a hard conversation, but you’ll save yourself a lot of stress and heartache. 🙂

    Post # 12
    Member
    2826 posts
    Sugar bee
    • Wedding: September 2013

    @beachrunner26:  the price you paid to attend her DW was worth it to you at the time, I’m sure. It’s a sunk cost. I wouldn’t even mention it. Just excuse her from attending yours since it’s such a burden, smh. And by all means make it clear that you are excusing her from attending since SHE made a big deal of how expensive it has been to be a friend of yours over the years, what with spending $9 on a meal and whatnot. 

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