Post # 1
Hi All, Fiance and I have been looking for houses since before we were even engaged. My father is an investor and owns three rental properties at the time and we’ve been thinking that it would be nice to open a multi family home for multiple reasons. 1.) after the wedding we could move into one unit of the home and 2.) our tenant would basically be paying our rent.
We’ve had some troubles finding a house that we like, and what we have liked, has gone under agreement faster than we could put in an offer. The market is brutal right now!!
My father has suggested that we move into one of his apartments after the wedding and live there for “free”. Basically just giving him money every month as “rent” that he would put aside and make sure we save in order to buy a house of our own in a year or so.
Fiance is NOT thrilled about this idea. He does not want to feel as if he owes my parents in the long run since they are doing this favor. I am not opposed to the idea just due to finances at the moment. Our wedding is costing us roughly 55k and i’m worried that buying a house that will need work to fix up and paying for the wedding will financially drain us.
What are your thoughts? Do you think it’s worth it to move into my fathers rental for the mean time? Or continue searching? I don’t want to get to the point that we are buying a house JUST BECAUSE Fiance does not want to live in my fathers home. (Side Note: the unit we would be moving into is spectacular, remodeled from top to bottom in 2010 when he purchased the house. 3 bedroom 6 room unit so it’s not like we’d be living in a run down unit!!)
Post # 3
Sounds like an ideal situation to me. I can understand your fiance feeling uncomfortable, but he’s your dad and he wants to help you out. If your Fiance really feels indebted to him, maybe you two could get your dad a small gift to show your appreciation?
Post # 4
Ummm do it! That’s a super generous offer! You’re so lucky you have family that can help in this way, and I’m sure they don’t see it as a favour at all! Would it make your Fiance feel better if he could act as building manager or offer to help around the building in some way? Make it more like he’d be doing your dad a favour by being there to deal with any tenant issues that may arise?
Post # 5
Honestly? That deal sounds amazing! I think it is absolutely worth it to move into your father’s rental for the meantime. Your father wouldn’t be offering you this deal if he was going to hang some kind of debt over your heads for the rest of your life. I mean, I don’t know your parents, but they don’t sound like the type.
My husband and I wouldn’t even hesitate to take my parents up on a deal like this. That way, you can save so you can get a home you REALLY want instead of just buying out of urgency.
Post # 6
I honestly think that you should consider your financial situation. Is your Father trustworthy to hold that amount of money? I would hope so, just a thought. Do you have plenty of money in savings? I would just suggest that you guys get in great financial shape before you purchase a home. Fiance & I just purchased a home, and paid about 10k in closing costs, not including the down payment. The seller paid our realtor fee, and several other fees. Not to mention the 2.5k that we spent at Home Depot to buy a bunch of stuff that Fiance said we “needed.” If you don’t put 20% down as a down payment you are looking at PMI (post mortgage insurance), which adds about another $100 (guestimate) to monthly costs. I would use a loan calculator and find out about how much you would pay monthly+taxes & insurance. If you’re not financially ready, I think you should rent your dads place, plus you’re essentially living there for free!!
Post # 7
It does sound like a good deal. The only thing that would rub me the wrong way is your Dad holding onto your money. If you all are getting married and thinking about buying a house, you should be responsible enough to save up on your own without your father policing that. But I’m sure he is just trying to help.
Post # 8
It may be worth it to stay at the rental, as long as you’ve established boundaries with your father.
Post # 9
If your fiancé is uncomfortable doing it, I would proceed very carefully. This type of situation could cause your Fiance to feel a lot of resentment in the long run.
It may be too late for this, and it’s not really my business, but I would look into cutting your wedding budget and diverting some of those funds toward your housing budget.
Post # 10
If you don’t have much money saved, I think this is a great idea. The wedding will take a lot of cash and it sounds like you will need to save up again for a downpayment and money for repairs.
Post # 11
@jamieg FI’s mom is a realtor so we’ve been going through her and her friends for all pre approvals and things of that nature which we are lucky. what we were approved for is FAR MORE than what we are looking to spend. i am not worried so much about paying a mortgage because the price point we are in the market for, we feel very comfortable with including PMI, taxes, insurance, it’s just all the LITTLE things like the home depot charges. everything adds up in a matter of seconds. & having my father hold onto our “rent” was never an issue I was scared of. Growing up he was always the one helping me save, even putting in money from his own check every week to help me watch my savings grow before I was working! 🙂
@bakerella Fiance is actually the one that did the whole remodeling of the house when my father first purchased it. Fiance runs his own company (he’s a contractor) and they came in and did a majority of the work at a really great price for my dad. I’m hoping mentioning this to him will maybe make him feel as though my dad is actually repaying us! Lol.
Thanks for all the input! Let’s see if I can get Fiance on board. I feel like at the time, this is def. what we need to do.
Post # 12
That’s a great deal your dad is offering! I would take it, and I’m sure your dad is happy to be able to help you guys get on your feet.
Post # 13
My best friend’s hudband’s parents bought their condo with cash, so friend and her Darling Husband write a check each month to the parents and the parents have been putting that money into an investment fund to be used on a down payment for their “forever home”.
They’ve been in the condo for three years, and now that interest rates are low and prices are awesome for the areas thry want to buy in, they’re ready. His parents are not willing to release the money to them so they can buy a house because they think prices will continue to drop, because they think they could accrue more profit in the investment fund, and because they don’t want my friend and her Darling Husband living in the suburbs.
My friend is miserable right now – the condo that she lives in and pays for isn’t even in her name, and her ILs have complete control of the three year’s payments they’ve been making. She knows tht with this arrangement they’ll have much more money to put down on a nicer house, but she’s so frustrated that she and her Darling Husband can’t make the decision and control the process independently. That might be what your Fiance is feeling…you trust your dad tmake involved and make these decisions with/for you, but it might be hard for your Fiance to be as on board as you are.