NEED ADVICE: Should we call the wedding off and elope?

posted 2 years ago in Elopement
Post # 2
1716 posts
Bumble bee

What does your fiancée think of eloping? Does he still want the wedding after all of these difficulties?

I think eloping/having a private ceremony is a great idea and perfect for your situation. If your fiancée is ok with it, I think you should do it. 

Post # 3
560 posts
Busy bee

If you can still back out of the arrangements you mentioned, I’d consider first a ‘closest family only’ wedding, then go on honeymoon (and keep it quiet about following this with a private ceremony to kick off your honeymoon, for a fresh angle on marriage the way you want it, after the intensity of the traditional wedding and families being at odds with eachother.)

Then if you still wanted to share your happiness with friends, how about going to a restaurant with a big crowd when you’re back?

Post # 4
558 posts
Busy bee

cschmidt1214:  The concept of marriage as we know it today is very far removed from the Biblical ideal of marriage. There for the stepbrother is full of nonsense, a man and woman coming together as on is Biblical full stop. That said it is not easy dealing with people that are set in their ways. I have had to deal with it too, and to a certain extent I am like that.

Your wedding is about a promise you and your FI is making to one another, a very important promise. It is a day that will be written on the tables of the both your heart’s for eternity. Think about how you want that story to be remembered, and told one day to children and grandchildren. I would suggest cancel everything, and start from scratch. Go away for a weekend, just away from the familiar, even if it’s a hotel in town. Give the weekend a name, like ‘The Big Plan’ or maybe something less cheesy! Then talk about what you want, and what your FI wants, listen well to one another. Decide what you as a couple want from the event and how and what you would like to remember and go with that, regardless of who says what and when. I, personally, am all for the idea of eloping and when the time comes I would definitely elope. Best of luck, I wish you well!

Post # 8
6788 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2014 - A castle!

Having 50 guests at a destination wedding sounds like you’re opening a can of worms. That is a LOT to ask for – 50 people to make travel arrangements out of the country, take a week off work, find sitters for pets or children. My suggestion would be to either have a local wedding, to have a small destination wedding maybe with just the MOH and best man in attendance and then have a party with family when you get back, or do a Sandals “Weddingmoon” which is an all-inclusive package that has most of the work done for you – you just need to show up with what you’re wearing. If you husband REALLY wants a big wedding, then try looking into local venues. I know in my family, if I tried to have a destination wedding it would be more like an obligation than a celebration and I probably wouldn’t get any wedding gifts, because most of the guests probably couldn’t afford it.

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