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I'm kind of of the mind that if people are close enough to you to join you for your home reception the option to attend the DW should at least be extended. I would think only those that are close enough to you would then choose to spend however much time/money to travel to your far away wedding.
That said, you could do something along the lines of "yourfiance'sname and stragewayshere we come are getting married in an intimate ceremony in yourdestination here, but would be delighted if you could join them for an at home celebration of their union/reception (your choice of wording there) on suchandsuchdate at suchandsuchaplace"
I would just send invites to an at home reception and call it that, a wedding reception. I dont think anyone would be offended that they werent invited to a very intimate destination wedding. My friend did the same, a destination with only closest friends and family, then a bigger recpetion back home. He refered to them both as his "wedding", but just that the destination had a ceremony.
thanks for replying, and I totally get what you are saying, though the reason I am only inviting few is because my wedding package only allows like 15 -20 people. It was really the only option that fit our budget.... my fiance has alot of friends.... lol they like to party. So I really need to figure out a way to do seperate invites. If I had a larger budget it might be different, but most beach weddings don't allow huge amounts of people. Which is how many we would have to invite.. lol
@pinkshoes: Yeah, most people tell me it would not be an offensive thing. I guess maybe I could word it as a marriage celebration. <:
I'm not sure what etiquette is in this situation but mh.albania had a small wedding and sent out cards afterwards to those who weren't invited that they wanted to include. I bookmarked the thread because I want to steal her idea and wording for family members that we're not inviting to our small wedding. It might work for you with small tweaks:
"...We took a photo holding a blank poster board, and then on photoshop we added the words 'Thinking of you, _________'. One with each person's name. We then sent these photos as postcards with the words - 'Even though we couldn't have everyone present on our special day, we were still thinking of you! Thank you for being part of our lives, and we hope to celebrate with you someday in the future! All our love, Mr. and Mrs...'
If you said "at our stateside reception" instead of "someday in the future" and included the reception info that could be a good way to word things.
Or maybe something like, "YOURFI and YOU are getting married in an intimate ceremony at YOURDESTINATION, and would be delighted if you could join them to celebrate upon their return at..."
@strangewaysherewecome: I totally get small packages, and where you're coming from, I'm just saying that I think people will self select (but you know your crowd better). I made wedding invitations for a destination bride, and she had me make 100 for her Maui wedding and at home reception so assuming she sent out all 100 to an average of groups of two, she invited 200 people, and ended up with 21 at the actual event.
@Aure: very cool idea! thank you so much for the response. I can't tell you how much I appreciate the input.
@LadyEvar: That is also a really good way to put it. I am feeling better about this already. <:
@SapphireSun: Very true! I will definitely keep that idea in mind. I really appreciate it.
@strangewaysherewecome: My friend made his invitation to look like a boarding pass, which was pretty cute, and there was no mention of the destination wedding ceremony. Just an regular invitation saying something like join us for a wedding celebration... Any one that knew them already knew they had a small destination wedding of about 25 people, so I dont think there was a need to mention it with apologies that not everyone could be invited or anything like that.
I'm doing the same thing. However there arent many people I didn't invite to my DW, I just pretty much invited everyone understandng that most wouldn't be able to come anyway. This was before I knew about wedding announcments and other ways to make people feel included even though they can't come, without actually inviting them. =/
anywhoo...we are having a reception here when we get back and I'm just sending out standard invites but instead of 'we request your presence at our wedding" I'm giong to just indicate "wedding reception." nearly everyone knows we are going to be wed in mexico, so I doubt there will be any confusion as to if there will be an actual ceremony or not.
@strangewaysherewecome: My friends did the same. They got married in Japan and came back home and had a wedding reception 2 months later. No-one thought it was weird. It was great because by then they had some of their wedding photos printed so we all got to see it.
it was one of the best receptions I have been to.
I wouldn't make any reference to the actual wedding ceremony at all. It'll confuse people because they aren't actually invited to that part.
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So, due to budget, my fiance and I are doing a small destination wedding with a simple beach ceremony. Our parents, grandparents,siblings and close friends/cousins are invited. Basically just the people that are closest to us. However, we would still like a day to celebrate with extended family and friends back home, so we plan on having a barbecue or some kind of get together reception type thing as soon as we return.
Here is where I am confused. I am going to send invites to the close relatives and a wedding announcement/reception invite to everyone else. How should I word the reception invites? I don't want it to seem like they weren't wanted at the wedding and just invited to the after party. I mean we just couldn't afford a big elaborate wedding. Any suggestons? I am open to anything. If you have some examples of other invites you have seen that would be good too. Thanks!!!