- 5 years ago
I’m in need of a fresh pair of eyes for my scenario, and this seems like the best place to get it!
So I have been in a long distance relationship for three months. We met while I was traveling in London in December/January. I was traveling alone, so was he, he asked me to eat lunch with him when he saw me in a restaurant, and the rest is history. It was one of the most romantic moments of my life. We had an instant connection that only grew with the time we spent together. We didn’t leave each others’s side until he had to go back to Germany (he is an American living in Germany, and I am an American living in California). It was like fate, and I’m not usually a believer in that sort of thing.
We continued our relationship after he left, he took my email and my phone number. He lived in California for a while before moving to Germany (thankfully not forever), and he came out and visited me in January. We had a fabulous weekend together before he had to head out and travel for work (he has a very demanding work schedule, with a regular job and his own startup company on top of that, and he travels a lot for work). We are supposed to be going on vacation together in a few weeks, and I’m really excited to see him. I’ve never felt like this about a guy before.
My question is this: I’m just not sure where I stand with him. On one hand, when we are physically together, he is extremely attentive and thoughtful. You can tell in his eyes that he is falling for me, and in how he acts, and how we interact together. It’s amazing. When we are apart, though, we are not in as much contact. We talk on the phone or skype video chat (lately it’s been more of skype video chat) about once a week, and we text message a few times. I have to initiate a lot of the messages, though it wasn’t like that as much in the beginning. When we do talk, he seems excited to see/hear me and we have wonderful conversations. He talks about continuing to see me in the future, and wants me to stay with him over the coming winter season. We’ve had talks about marriage and children and future dreams (though hypothetical, and he brought them up). Yet I have always thought that guys who really liked girls will contact them more and initiate more often. I sent him an email a few weeks ago expressing my desire to communicate more, and he was very responsive and wonderful about it. Things improved a bit, and he is making more of an effort, but it’s still not super often. Am I just dealing with a very busy guy who is not so good at communicating (he’s never done distance before), or what? I am so confused. Should I just ask him when we see each other next? How? Another thing you should know is, while he has expressed that he is not interested in seeing other people, we are not “official.” Should I initiate that too, or be more patient? I have never done distance like this before (starting out as distance), so I just have no idea what to do. I miss him a lot. It hurts me, and I’m scared by how much I’m falling for him. I just don’t want to get hurt.
*Side note: I am moving to Germany to work, not in his city but in a city close by, in a few months, so our distance will be closed by then. He is looking forward to it.