Post # 1
One of my college friends came to my wedding with her boyfriend and no gift or card. She also didn’t come to my shower but didn’t send a gift Or card. She claims to be one of my best friends but the truth is she’s so not dependable. She says the rebeing having no gift was due to not having any money (being in med school) but yet she’ll text me from getting ghee hair highlighted, golfing or out at a bar. She still gets manicures too. And her and her boyfriend are living in a 2 bedroom loft. When my boyfriend and I had no money we lived in 1 bedroom to save. She still texts me like nothing is wrong or doesn’t seem to get how rude this is. I’d really like to not even be friends w her anymore over this. It was also a final staw situation. Not so much about money. I just feel like its so rude to text someone about a new outfit, manicure, highlights or golf when they say thy have no money for a gift for you!
Post # 3
You cant tell people how to spend thier money… people have different priorities..
Im becoming and more shocke by how preoccupied people are with gifts on this website.. she came and shared the day with you.. if youre just inviting people for gifts pleas make sure and state that a gift will be required for entry on the inviation, so that you can save yourself some heartache…
Post # 4
Ummm sounds like you already arent real friends
ETA: Is this a real post bc the weekend is near and that’s usually when this happens….
Post # 5
@Kandiss16: I could not agree with you more about how preoccupied with gifts people seem to be here
Post # 6
@Burnedbee: Sounds like you only wanted guests to come and give presents. While I agree it’s rude to attend a wedding empty handed, it’s even more rude to complain about not receiving a gift or card. Ending a friendship over this is immature. It’s her money to spend how she chooses and if manicures and highlights are important to her that’s her choice. If you only had the wedding expecting to profit I think you got married for the wrong reasons and should have saved yhe tome, energy and money from throwing the wedding in the first place.
Post # 7
@gelaine22: +1, was just thinking the same thing. Was going to write a response but now I won’t bother, lol.
Post # 8
@gelaine22: u might b right.. doesnt hav any other posts and her wedding is already passed
Post # 9
It’s honestly not about money. I had friends come w no gift and we talk all the time. Another’s check bounced. I would never say anything to her – and understand she must be going through something. And we still talk all the time. just gets annoying to hear another cry poor when clearly she is not. She also did this at another friends wedding so maybe it’s a pattern. I would never go to wedding w out a gift.
Post # 10
@Burnedbee: That’s because you’re not tacky like your friend is. It is extremely gauche to come to a wedding without even a card to congratulate the couple on their wedding. Making a scene about it is tacky too, though.
I’ve never, ever heard of the concept that brides invite people to their wedding for the gifts. Um, what? Why not just save the $100+ pp you’ll spend on their food and drink and go buy yourself a $20 toaster oven? What a collosal waste of cash to throw a reception just for the gifts! Like I said, never done.
The reason why people “expect” gifts is because it is proper etiquette to at least show up with a card or whatever you can afford. Of course a bride will get offended if people come empty handed to a wedding; not because they “expect” gifts but because it shows how little the couple means to that person when the couple is giving them free food, free drink, free alcohol (likely), free favors, etc. It’s tacky because it is offensive! That’s what tacky means! If no one gets offended, then it is not tacky, hence your whole, “yeah it is tacky but so is expecting gifts” argument goes down the drain.
Post # 11
@Burnedbee: …so…you’re willing to throw a friendship away because this med student, who’s finances are none of your affair, neglected to remit a gift at either your shower or wedding, but had the audacity to remain in her 2 bedroom loft, maintain her regular beauty regime which includes but is not limited to getting her hair hightlighted and manicures and continue to go out and have fun at golf clubs and such…..THAT BITCH….