Post # 1
Where should I start…………..
I’m super stressed out about budget. At the beginning of our planning, I was working two jobs, FI working one and in Grad school, and we were okay. Now I’m down a job, and things are getting very tight. We initially wanted a guest list of 80, which spiraled to 100 after “extra” people were added via my Mom and FI’s Mom. The original budget was $15K, now we are almost up to $25K. We absolutely are unable to afford that. WP says cut the guest list and your troubles will go away. But I ask you guys, how can I do that, especially after sending out STD’s? Am I crazy to be embarassed, humiliated, mortified, (insert other words of dismay here) to call people and say, “sorry, we’re broke. You can’t come to the wedding anymore”. What do you guys think?
Post # 3
i wouldn’t feel comfortable uninviting people. is there anything else in the wedding that you can cut/scale back? flowers, centerpieces, transportation, etc…
Post # 4
you can’t cut the guest list if you already sent STDs to those people. I think that would just be mean and rude. This is one of the bad things about STDs.
I would find some other way to cut down your costs. Or can you recoup some costs by selling things afterward?
Or can you forego a honeymoon for awhile? Or get another job?
As a last resort maybe you could take out a temporary loan and pay it back within a year?
Post # 5
- Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas
Honestly, once you’ve sent STD’s it’s pretty much impossible to cut guests without hurting feelings. Is there anywhere else you could cut back that would make a big enough difference?
Post # 6
You could re-shape the wedding, stay within budget, and not cut the guest list. Move from a dinner reception to appetizers or just cake & punch? It can be done! Don’t stress too much.
Post # 7
I agree that cutting the style of the event would be far better than cutting the guest list. My friend had to cut back her budget and she just had a pasta buffet and a sundae bar! Everyone had a great time and it made things really fun without having to uninvite.
Post # 8
I agree that cutting back on style and things here and there is the answer. Unfortunately it’s too late to uninvite guests if you’ve sent out STDs.
Everybody gave good suggestions but whatever you do, do not take out loans if you can help it. Since you already mentioned grad school I’m assuming that you and your FH are already going to have plenty of debt (I’m in the same unhappy grad school debt boat), so don’t add to that to pay for your wedding. Plus you may already have a mortgage or you will someday. Cut back on costs in the other ways listed above. There’s tons of great resources on the internet to help with cost-saving tips too.
Post # 9
Thanks everyone. These are all great ideas.
@artbee @amandalynn @thepinksuperhero @rachelleigh-we are looking at everything, and are brainstorming ways to cut back. We have a conference call with the WP to try to get things back in control.
@amarien25 we are not going on our honeymoon until our 1 year anniversary, simply because we can’t afford it. I am busting my butt trying to find another job-believe me I wish one could fall in my lap.
Post # 10
- Wedding: April 2011 - The Tribute Golf Club
I hope everything works out! Hopefully cutting back on other things like flowers and decor will help out your budget. I know how you feel (and I’m still far away), but every time I look at the initial guest list, all I can do is call my parents and tell them we can’t take the chance on more people coming even if my parents say they won’t come. I just don’t want to take the chance.
Post # 11
I would cut back on food, flowers, favors-things people really won’t remember all that much. People liek to eat, so whatever you give them will be fine. if you are doing a sit down dinner-change it to a buffet. If you have a band-go with a DJ instead. There are a lot of options to cut down your budget. We are having a 100 person wedding and our budget is under 10K and that’s with a sit down dinner. Keep the things that are important-cut the rest.
Post # 12
Our biggest problem is we are using a venue that is completely empty-besides tables and chairs. We have to bring in all rentals. We are currently looking at other venues that are inclusive of everything, but it sucks because we wanted a unique venue that has never been done before. I guess those are the sacrifices you make when planning a wedding.
Post # 13
Would it be possible to talk to your mom and FI’s mom and explain that you can no longer afford so many people? Maybe faced with the prospect of loosing guests they can help to cover some of the costs.
Post # 14
@amour toujour Unfortunately, we have looked into alloptions. Our mother’s are not in a place where they can afford to help us (they are both in their ealry 50’s and caring for young children as well). They are single parents, and trying like hell to survive in this economy. My father was supposed to help us, but he has since reneged on a lot of promises.
It has been an emotion filled roller coaster ride this weekend. My FI and I decided that we are going to have to cancel the entire event, simply because it has become too much to handle. We have been arguing non-stop, and we made the joint decidion to cut it before we end up resenting each other for anything. We will still have a small ceremony, perhaps with a JOP, and have been toying with the idea of having a family only dinner at a restaurant with the money we have saved thus far. Believe me, it’s disappointing, but I’d rather us do this now, instead of going through everything and being flat broke later. We have future plans, and we are afraid that if we put so much into the wedding, we will not be able to move onto better things later. Maybe we can have a rocking anniversary party later on down the line.
Post # 15
Have you talked to you mom about this? Perhaps she can help with the costs of those extra guests that were added…
Post # 16
ouch – good luck… I have read that you have been busting buns to make it work. I would stick with that – cut a few things that aren’t as necessary but make sure you keep your guest list the same. You never know – you may end up with less Yes RSVPs than you think, which may solve your problem.