(Closed) Need to cut guest list-STD’s have gone out already HELP!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

posted 8 years ago in Emotional
Post # 3
Member
6572 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: February 2010

i wouldn’t feel comfortable uninviting people. is there anything else in the wedding that you can cut/scale back? flowers, centerpieces, transportation, etc…

Post # 4
Member
2767 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

you can’t cut the guest list if you already sent STDs to those people.  I think that would just be mean and rude.  This is one of the bad things about STDs.  

I would find some other way to cut down your costs.  Or can you recoup some costs by selling things afterward?

Or can you forego a honeymoon for awhile?  Or get another job?

As a last resort maybe you could take out a temporary loan and pay it back within a year?

Post # 5
Member
4765 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: January 2011 - Vintage Villas

Honestly, once you’ve sent STD’s it’s pretty much impossible to cut guests without hurting feelings. Is there anywhere else you could cut back that would make a big enough difference?

Post # 6
Member
272 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: April 2010

You could re-shape the wedding, stay within budget, and not cut the guest list.  Move from a dinner reception to appetizers or just cake & punch?  It can be done!  Don’t stress too much.

Post # 7
Member
979 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2010

I agree that cutting the style of the event would be far better than cutting the guest list.  My friend had to cut back her budget and she just had a pasta buffet and a sundae bar!  Everyone had a great time and it made things really fun without having to uninvite.

Post # 8
Member
36 posts
Newbee

I agree that cutting back on style and things here and there is the answer.  Unfortunately it’s too late to uninvite guests if you’ve sent out STDs.  

Everybody gave good suggestions but whatever you do, do not take out loans if you can help it.  Since you already mentioned grad school I’m assuming that you and your FH are already going to have plenty of debt (I’m in the same unhappy grad school debt boat), so don’t add to that to pay for your wedding.  Plus you may already have a mortgage or you will someday.  Cut back on costs in the other ways listed above.  There’s tons of great resources on the internet to help with cost-saving tips too.  

Post # 10
Member
824 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2011 - The Tribute Golf Club

I hope everything works out! Hopefully cutting back on other things like flowers and decor will help out your budget.  I know how you feel (and I’m still far away), but every time I look at the initial guest list, all I can do is call my parents and tell them we can’t take the chance on more people coming even if my parents say they won’t come. I just don’t want to take the chance.

Post # 11
Member
37 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I would cut back on food, flowers, favors-things people really won’t remember all that much.  People liek to eat, so whatever you give them will be fine.  if you are doing a sit down dinner-change it to a buffet.  If you have a band-go with a DJ instead.  There are a lot of options to cut down your budget.  We are having a 100 person wedding and our budget is under 10K and that’s with a sit down dinner.  Keep the things that are important-cut the rest.

Post # 13
Member
118 posts
Blushing bee

Would it be possible to talk to your mom and FI’s mom and explain that you can no longer afford so many people? Maybe faced with the prospect of loosing guests they can help to cover some of the costs.

Post # 15
Member
592 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: September 2013

Have you talked to you mom about this?  Perhaps she can help with the costs of those extra guests that were added…

Post # 16
Member
3125 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: December 2009

ouch – good luck… I have read that you have been busting buns to make it work. I would stick with that – cut a few things that aren’t as necessary but make sure you keep your guest list the same.  You never know – you may end up with less Yes RSVPs than you think, which may solve your problem. 

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