- 4 years ago
- Wedding: May 2013
Here is the backstory: my husband and I live in our house. The house was originally the grandparents, but they put it into a trust for the 3 grandchildren (my partner and his 2 brothers). My partner owns another house, but rents it (and I sold my house). Two years ago, a month after I moved in, his older brother moved in. he originally said he would be here a month, maybe two and was “between jobs”. He only got a job about a month later. He lived with us for 8-9 months and it was awful – he didn’t work, he didn’t clean up (washed his sheets ONE TIME), rarely bought food, yelled at the tv while my partner was trying to sleep. It got so bad that WE considered moving out. Had to get the parents involved, so they made the older son (almost 40) move in with them.
So he moved in with the parents, and our life was much better. The main problem is the that brother’s stuff is still here. While our house isn’t tiny, it isn’t large. We have a small apartment’s worth of stuff in our basement/screened in patio. My partner has been talking about fixing up the patio, but… um…. there’s so much stuff there! We’re talking a futon, several chairs, a washer and dryer, two bookcases, a desk, etc. We put the futon in our basement. Also, since we got married a month ago I moved the rest of my stuff in (we broke up for a few months). I’m slowly going through my stuff and getting rid of it, and we’re moving around furniture and what not.
I want the brother’s stuff OUT. It’s in the way and it stresses my partner out. Now, my partner DESPISES confrontation. He will avoid it at all costs. He also feels that he doesn’t have a right to ask the brother to take his stuff out b/c the house is partly his (and i agree to a degree). However, when your wife is debating renting a storage unit, don’t you think it’s time to get that stuff out? I think that my partner needs to sit down with his parents and brother, adn work on a timeline to get it out. Also, there is enough room for it at the parents house. I jokingly told my partner for his grad party next summer, I can utilize the furniture. The bookcases can hold different flavors of cupcakes on each shelf, and the washer will be filled with ice to hold beverages.
What should we do? Do we have a right to ask the brother to take his stuff back? If so, how do we go about that? How do I stop stressing over this? Any help is much appreciated.