Need to Vent about my OB and her obsession with my weight

posted 2 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 2
Member
567 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2014

That was unprofessional and shockingly insensitive. Is there any way you can request not to see her again and tell why? I can see why you were so upset. Some people…

Post # 3
Member
856 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: August 2012

Mrs.Metalm:  So rude. This late in the game you’ll start retaining water also which you just can’t control. I would also request not to see her again. I’m sorry that happened to you. 

Post # 4
Member
1959 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2013

Mrs.Metalm:  Oh man, I’m so sorry you had to endure that.  She sounds like a real b**tch.  I agree with PP, call ahead and ask which days she covers and try to schedule around that.  They should be able to accomodate you.  Way to go on the pre-pregnancy weight loss btw!!

Post # 5
Member
1302 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: October 2015

that is SO unprofessional! do not let her get to you. wow, the nerve of that woman. you should definitely put in a request to NEVER have her again. and don’t worry, you are eating and nurturing a beautiful little being inside you and doing all that you can. so she should really keep her mouth shut. 

Post # 6
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Mrs.Metalm:  Her bedside manner is insulting, but her message is very clear. What she should have done is connected you with a nutritionist to help keep you on track and healthy. Obesity, as I’m sure you know, is twice as serious when pregnant. It’s not just gaining weight during pregnancy. Gestational diabetes, extra stress on kidneys, liver, etc… those are all really serious concerns for even pregnant moms who started out at a healthy weight. Just stay on target, stop whining (I know, I know that’s not nice to say to a pregnant lady, but billions of other women have been in your shoes before, so suck it up), and go have a healthy baby. 

And FYI, good for you for losing 60 pounds. That weight loss isn’t for you anymore. It’s for your beautiful baby!

Post # 7
Member
2704 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: January 2015

Mrs.Metalm:  Ahhhhh! I’m not even pregnant and this makes me sooo angry.

First of all, good for you! For both getting in shape (I’m in the process now and know how hard it is) and for not FREAKING out on her, which I totally would have done.

Agree with PPs, request not to have her, or perhaps file a formal complaint if you can. So unprofessional.

Post # 8
Member
2047 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

Mrs.Metalm:  She seems odd to me…. 20 lbs and your in your 8th month, thats great! After you said “todays appt” I thought you were going to say your only like a few months in which is why she said ouch. She has to be on crazy pills!

Post # 9
Member
1075 posts
Bumble bee

coffeedrinker:  Totally agree.

Although the delivery of the message could have been better, it needed to be said. I know someone who at first was majorly pissed off at her ob/gyn for giving her crap about her weight but then her tune changed when she realized how much she could harm her baby. Lipid disorders and all the other ailments that come from gaining too much weight are a big deal. Congrats on making the lifestyle change and losing 60lbs–it’s not easy. 

Post # 10
Member
1131 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2014

The midwife’s weight has nothing to do with the medical advice she gives to you. Neither does whether or not she has ever been pregnant.

It sounds like she’s being overly pushy about your weight, but just try to take her words objectively. Listen, nod, keep following medical advice as best you can, and if your weight is still not “ideal”, you’ll know in your heart you are doing everything right no matter what one pushy midwife says.

Post # 11
Member
1230 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: June 2015

Mrs.Metalm:  Wait, you are in your 8th month but have 54 days left??? There has to be a typo somewhere.

Post # 12
Member
943 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

I don’t disagree with pp who say weight management is important, but it seems like OP is already doing what she can. Besides, if she’s 8 months pregnant, it would be a little late to start worrying. If the other doctors/midwives are not concerned, just keep doing your best, OP! You’re almost there!

Post # 13
Member
1175 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: February 2011

coffeedrinker:  Techinically pregnancy can be dated as ten months, depending how you choose to calculate and 54 days to go puts the OP in week 32 or 33 – so in the eight month!

Post # 14
Member
6502 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: September 2011 - Baby boy 12/2015

Mrs.Metalm:  I always thought the recommended/suggested weight gain for a pregnant woman was around 25 lbs, so you’re not even there yet. It’s not just your weight, it’s the baby and other stuff. I’m sure there is a reason why doctors recommend 25 lbs weight gain. I wouldn’t listen to her, and you’re doing great by trying to stay healthy. Congrats!

Post # 15
Member
1075 posts
Bumble bee

candy11:  Actually, it depends on your starting weight (among other factors). Most women who are considered overweight may only need to gain 15lbs or less, while women who are underweight may need to gain as much as 40lbs. For women who are very overweight, weight loss is even suggested (I know a girl who actually was told to lose weight during her pregnany). So there really isn’t a “standard” amount of weight every woman should gain while they’re pregnant…

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