(Closed) Need your advice

posted 6 years ago in Relationships
Post # 3
Member
812 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Counseling should help, but I’d shop around for a really good one that can meet your needs and help you get through this.

Post # 4
Member
84 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

This is probably easier said than done but…

by letting your ex get to you like this you are LETTING HIM WIN and he was such an ass**** the way he treated you and then the final slap in the face was leaving you for someone else.

Not all men are like him and if your fiance has never given you a reason to feel so uncomfortable or feel the way your ex made you feel then I think you should try to relax about it. you are a beautiful woman too and as soon as you realise that you will feel more secure. but please don’t get upset and let the ex win over your feelings like this. he is NOT woth it!!!! as long as your fiance makes you feel beautiful you have nothing to worry about!!!

Post # 5
Member
2494 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: July 2012

I have been in a very similar situation to yours, and I think you need to go to councilling. It will help you deal with your feelings and emotions. Also, if you haven’t already, I think you need to be upfront with your FI. Let him know how you are feeling, that you know it is irrational, and you are looking at ways to deal with your feelings and emotions.

If you felt that your last councillor didn’t help, I’d suggest trying someone new. I think I saw 3 or 4 councillors before I found one that was just right to help me and I was doing slightly better almost immediately.

Post # 6
Member
5075 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2012

Definitely get a new counselor – it can take a while to get a good fit.

I would sit down and talk with your SO about it.  It’s a big thing in your life and he should be a part of the healing.  

Post # 7
Member
9631 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

@GroovyHippieChick:  I agree. 

Try talking with your SO, because you’re really not being “jealous” per se, you’re still recovering from your past negative experience.  Let him know how you feel and hopefully he’ll be able to help you cope better.  Also, sometimes finding the right counselor does take a little time, don’t give up looking for a better one.

 

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