(Closed) Nervous about officiant…

posted 7 years ago in Secular
Post # 3
Member
106 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

I was in a similar situation and it’s tough! I would be careful…it sounds like it is very possible he might try to slip in some religious references, maybe innocently but still …if that isn’t what you want, it isn’t a good match. I would definitely start looking for another one and see what you come up with. You might find a great fit and then you can politely tell the friend you’ve decided to go another way.

You could also keep the meeting and express your concerns to him again at that point. If that’s the first time you will be bringing up the issue in person to him I think you will get a pretty good idea of how he really feels from that. Then depending on what happens at the meeting you could either go with the other person you found OR keep the current one.

 

Post # 4
Member
5263 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: June 2012

Eek, that’s awkward! Have you written him back yet? I would say something along the lines of “we really appreciate your offer, but it would mean a lot to us to keep the whole day completely non-religious. We would, however, love you to say a few words about how thankful we are that everyone came out.” (Or whatever.) 

In my experience, you really can’t let one or two things slip by with regards to religious references, because then they start pouring through. I understand at a family event or something, but this is YOUR wedding, and should reflect the two of you!

Post # 5
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

I agree with love2lol. I think in person you’ll get a better sense of whether or not this is a good fit. But start looking for somebody else in the meantime-just in case.

Good luck!!

Post # 7
Member
5496 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: April 2010

That sounds great! I think you said it beautifully.

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