(Closed) Nervous about pregnancy and changes to the body

posted 6 years ago in Pregnancy
Post # 3
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

I was also afraid of a lot of the physical stuff, but the more you take care of yourself, the better.  Plus, you may luck out!  I am 34.5 weeks, and I have have almost no morning sickness (maybe one or two times max), I have gained the appropriate amount of weight, no stretch marks (yet!), and I have done prenatal yoga to help me along.  I also have no swelling yet. 

I am also 5’1″  and I am doing just fine!  I expected it to be a lot worse honestly.  Only recently have I been uncomfortable at times.  I can’t bend over very well, and I get stuck in my recliner after a long day and squirm around like an upside-down bug.  But during the days I am fine to spend hours shopping, cleaning etc.

Lately I have had a good amount of pressure, which does hurt.  But it is manageable.

As far as what I love, I love feeling her move!  She is getting strong, so sometimes it hurts a little….or sometimes she kicks my bladder!  I also love the overall excitement of the whole process and getting ready for her.

 

 

Post # 4
Member
9029 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: June 2011

Pregnancy is different for everyone, so you really wont know what it will be like for you until you are actually going through it. If you really want a baby you just have to look at pregnancy as a temporary phase you go through

Post # 5
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

I think asking this question and getting answers may not help you. Every pregnancy is so different and some people have wonderful pregnancies and other people have miserable ones (I’m on the miserable side).  If you’re really ready, then I don’t think what would happen to you would actually matter. You said your “emotionally ready”, but part of that is being ok with the fact that your entire body might change. That’s an emotional and mental barrier in itself.

Post # 6
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

@GeorgiaTeacup:  Those were some of my biggest fears as well! I didn’t want to give up drinking, my regular medications, get fat and rip my girly bits apart either. I think what really helped me was that it didn’t happen for us right away. We tried for almost a year before we finally got pregnant, and I’m almost glad it took us that long because the longer we tried and failed, the more I realized how much I really WAS willing to sacrifice to have a baby. Suddenly all those things I was concerned about seemed like a small trade off when faced with the possibility of “what if I CAN’T have kids at all?”

If you check out some of the Infertility threads and TTC 6 months and up club, it really makes you appreciate how much of a gift and a miracle a baby really is and how lucky some of us are to not have to go through what some of the beautiful bees on those boards are having to go through. I bet if you asked them if they liked injecting themselves with hormones daily and going thousands and thousands of dollars in debt just to even GET pregnant, they’d tell you no, but it’s all about how much each of us is willing to sacrifice.

I say this because I dont want to be discouraging. As for me personally, I do HATE being pregnant, but because of what I went through to get here, I’m just super grateful to make whatever sacrifices I need to to have this baby. Can’t say I’m motivated to have number two at this point, but I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.

Post # 7
Member
3363 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

Oh man, I feel like an ass now 🙁

I always feel guilty when I say I’ve had an easy time.  But, a lot of you know what it took for me to get here!  So coming from the physical and emotional toll of a year and a half of infertility treatments, this seems easy!  I guess it is all relative!!  Plus I do realize I am one of the luckier ones during pregnancy and I am so extremely grateful to the pregnancy Gods for that!!!

 

Post # 8
Member
7587 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: December 2010

@PandasWifey:  I hate it too. I’m only having this one because I hate it so much.

I am thankful because of our struggle to get pregnant and keep a baby. That’s enough to get through this everyday. I only have 100 days left today!!! 

Post # 8
Member
1115 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2009

@heathaah:  Nooo, don’t feel bad! I’m glad she got to hear from someone with a more positive pregnancy experience. And I think you’re probably right about the fact that having to go through what you did just to get pregnant has you taking the rest of this journey with stride. I’m not super religious myself, but perhaps God only wants each of us to have a certain amount of struggle in things and you got all of your baby-related challenges out of the way already 🙂

I do think a lot of us go into it blissfully jaded that we’ll be able to get preggo no problem, some are lucky and do, but the rest of just appreciate the miracle that much more when it happens. Nothing wrong with that!

@OP I bet after just a few months of trying for a baby, you’ll be way more ready than when you first started! That’s if you’re sure parenthood is what you want and you’re willing to make the sacrifices.

Post # 9
Member
1116 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: August 2008

I really agree with PPs.  Pregnancy may be easier or worse than you ever expect. Yes, I have bad days, but I had plenty of worse days non-pregnant!  Getting winded and tired so much more easily, and having trouble sleeping well, even in early pregnancy were some of my surprises.  Taking care of yourself can make a HUGE difference.  Eating well and keeping up with exercise will do wonders for keeping your energy levels up and a lot of aches and pains away.  Unfortunately, some women just have a really hard time throughout regardless.

 As mwitter mentioned, part of being emotionally ready is being ok with changes to your body.  This doesn’t necessarily happen 100% before getting pregnant, I will admit.  But for me, after seeing them on ultrasound, and knowing it was twins, something clicked and I knew I would do ANYTHING possible to protect these babies and keep them strong and healthy.  That maternal instinct gets stronger the further along I get, and it’s definitely produced a sense of surrender in my mind to the whole process.

The bottom line is that it’s not a bowling ball, it’s your child.  And its fundamentally different when your discomfort is serving to grow a life (vs being ill or injured).  While a pregnant mom has to do the hard work, she also gets that amazing bond that comes along wtith carrying a child.

Post # 10
Member
140 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2011

I agree 100% with MerryC.  I was also anxious about all the physical and emotional (hormones!!!) changes, and I had hyperemesis the first 20 weeks.  Once I acknowledged that the tougher symptoms of pregnancy were just temporary and they were part of growing my baby, it became easier to deal with them.  If I was that sick with anything but a baby, i.e. cancer treatment or a disease, I would’ve probably had a much harder time dealing with it.  Its just easier knowing thats your kid and you love it so intensely that the side effects are worth it.

Post # 11
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

thanks everyone for sharing on this threay! we just started ttcing and i feel emotionally ready and all, but just watching easy birth scenes romantic comedies makes me flinch!

and i think i am going to miss the body i have been used to all my life. how were everyone’s experiences with gaining weight, getting stretch marks etc? i guess maybe once you’re in full mom-swing, it doesn’t matter anymore? although one of my friends who had always been very skinny was really depressed for about a year after having her first child because she couldn’t handle the change in her body… any thoughts?

Post # 13
Member
291 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: August 2011

@GeorgiaTeacup:  LOL, good to hear i’m not the only one thinking about this stuff!

and how did you educate your FI? my husband still thinks all women look like heidi klum after giving birth and calls pregnant women fat (in a joking way but it still really offends me!)…

Post # 14
Member
9629 posts
Buzzing Beekeeper
  • Wedding: September 2012

I was nervous at first, but it turned out I loved being pregnant!  My hair was luxuriously thick and my nails were perfect.  I was one of those glowing, happy pregnant women.  My skin was absolutely perfect and I didn’t have to wear makeup the whole time.  All that said, I had terrible morning sickness and was really tired the first trimester.  But once I got through that stage it was the most wonderful feeling of health and vibrancy ever.  When I got to the last stage it got more uncomfortable, but by then I was used to being pregnant and very bonded with my baby.  But by the end I was definitely very ready for his birth.  I loved everything about it, in certain ways.  Stay focused on the positive aspects of the blessing of the miracle as much as you can and it helps.  Otherwise, it is kind of like your body is being taken over by an alien, lol. 

Post # 15
Member
156 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I have two children- I had my first at 32 and my second at 37. I had relatively easy pregnancies (minus the kidney stones Yell) and I loved being pregnant. I am 5’2″ and 115 lbs, this is the same as before children and I gained roughly 40 pounds each time (no stretch marks either, but I don’t think that’s normal for that much weight gain). I believe breastfeeding was a big part of me getting back to my pre-pregnancy size, and I joined the local YMCA which offers free childcare while you work out. Staying active while pregnant was key for me both physically and mentally. I had a c-section with my first and a VBAC (vaginal birth after cesarean) with my second so I’ve experienced both, and honestly neither was as bad as I feared! My advice there is to be prepared for either- I was terrified of a c-section so I didn’t really research it, and when it happened to me I was not very informed. I highly recommend joining Babycenter, especially the forums when you are ready to try to concieve. It is a fantastic source of support and information.

I will also tell you that finding a doctor or midwife you trust is very, very important. Find one who feels the same as you about going past your due date, pain relief, inductions, etc. I’ve heard too many stories of important issues not being discussed until later in the pregnancy and the woman then finds out that she and her doctor do not agree.

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