Post # 1
I am a little upset about my upcoming shower. Only about 1/3 of the guests are able to make it. The vast majority RSVP’d no, even though they were given six weeks notice of the date and it is not a holiday weekend or anything. I don’t know why – I guess people had other plans or don’t consider me important enough to come out for.
My mom told me this and gave me the option of canceling because it is going to be so small. I am really embarrassed that those who do show up are going to think I have no friends or no one likes me. My college friends all live far away and haven’t been very good friends through out my planning process at all – none are even coming to the wedding. My Maid/Matron of Honor dropped out of the wedding, and although she claims she is coming to the shower, she has flaked out at the last minute for the past several events she has been invited to, so I don’t have high hopes. My FI’s family lives far away too, so them coming is not an option. I invited my local friends, most of whom I know through work, and they have other commitments, so they have declined.
It will basically end up being my mom and some aunts and cousins, two other friends of mine, and two distant family friends (who I am pretty sure my mom pressured into coming because she didn’t want me to feel so bad the shower was so small). That is a grand total of 10. I am really embarrassed to have such a small shower and afraid people will judge me for not having friends. I feel really sad because I see all over Facebook other people I know getting married and having huge showers with 30-40 people, mountains of gifts, etc, and I am pretty nervous about mine being so small. Only four gifts have been purchased off my registry.
Has anyone else gone through this and had a really small shower and how did it turn out?
Post # 3
🙁 its terrible that you are not looking forward to your shower. I think you should be less concerned about people judging you and more concerned with who your true friends are. I would rather have a tiny group of true friends than a whole caravan of aquantances! Just relax a little and try to enjoy yourself
Post # 4
It’s totally fine, sweety! I had invited about 28 people and had 15 show up- I was heart broken just like you when I realized no one was coming but it ended up being sooo much fun and more intimate. We still played all the games and had a really fun time. I had only 6 gifts purchased off my registry for the shower but almost everyone who came brought something (some just didn’t check gifts off or bought them else where)
Post # 5
Honestly, 10 people sounds like a really nice number! You can sit around and chat, and not have to worry about making the rounds, etc.
Post # 6
I’m not exactly sure how many have RSVP’d “yes” to my shower, but I would guess it’s only about 10 (most of the women are Out of Town, and I only invited family & my bridal party). I do have doubts that it will be awkward, but overall I know it will be fine. No one is going to “judge” you! Just request that they offer some mimosas to help you loosen up so you’re not worried about it & can just enjoy the people who DO show up- at least that’s my plan 🙂
Post # 7
@SquidWeds: exactly! Make the rounds at your wedding, let your shower feel more laid back, drink a little bit and just giggle the day away <3
Post # 8
I dont get it. Why would anyone judge you due to the number of friends you have? And why do you care what they think? I guess Im just different as long as the main people that I love is there everyone else is optional. And since I dont have a large number of true friends, my thoughts on this is different.
Enjoy what you do have versus what you dont !!!
Post # 9
Hey Maggierose, I know it’s a downer thinking that you invited x amount of people and only a few are showing up, howeverl like the others said it doesn’t mean you can’t have fun!
I have been to 2 showers and both were about 10 people, both were still good and got some interesting gifts.
Post # 10
It’s going to be fine. I am only going to have around 12 people at my shower. I like the idea of having a small shower.
Post # 11
I’m sorry 🙁 I worry about these things too. One of my friends is having a shower with about 15-18 people and it’s more of a “luncheon.” I don’t think 10 people is a bad number!
Post # 12
i’m having a shower on saturday with 7 ladies, and i couldn’t be more thrilled! think of it this way- you won’t be spending the entire time rushing from person to person, but rather, you’ll get to enjoy each person fully! i think 10 women sounds IDEAL!!! get excited =)
Post # 13
Oh no, I see why you’re upset. I have a terrible fear of having any kind of event and no one attending. My mom is throwing a small shower of about 10-12 people at her house and we are doing a wine tasting along with the shower, it’s just going to be my aunts and cousins and maybe a friend or two from high school. I think it will be nice because I won’t have to worry about it too much since it’s really just family.
I attended a shower last summer for the bride of a wedding Fiance was in. They had lots of tables set up and a nice spread because a lot of people rsvp’d for it. She ended up only having about 3 people show up besides her bridesmaids, Future Mother-In-Law & her Mother. We all had a blast regardless, and she didn’t seem to let it phase her at all.
I hope you still enjoy your shower regardless of how it turns out. 🙂
Post # 14
- Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry
I wouldn’t cancel your shower- sounds like it will be a nice, intimate event. This isn’t a competition with your friends, and it sounds like people have good reasons to rsvp with regrets. Most registry gifts are purchased right before an event (I used to work at crate & barrel, and had a guy buy a gift in between the ceremony and reception), so I wouldn’t worry about that. Even if the other guests give you cards, it can still be a great day. I’ll probably have a dozen at my shower- I’ve been to ones with over 30, but it’s not bothering me.
Post # 15
I will also be having a very small shower. When I first looked at the list I was sending my bridesmaids of who to invite, and then thought about who would actually come, I felt my stomach sink a little. Now I’m excited. I’m a total introvert, and my fiance and I are choosing to have a small wedding, so this shower will be very intimate. I think it will be way better, for me!
Post # 16
I only had about 12 people at my shower, and I was kind of hurt at first…but then honestly, it was really nice!!! It gave me the opportunity to really take time to visit with everyone and it was just so much more personal. Don’t stress hun…just enjoy it! 🙂