(Closed) Nervous of stepping on cousin’s toes (sorry – long)

posted 8 years ago in Family
  • poll: Should I talk to my cousin before picking a weekend and booking the chapel?
    No way - she can fend for herself : (15 votes)
    75 %
    Yes - be considerate of her dates : (1 votes)
    5 %
    Yes - but don't come out and tell her you're setting a date, just get a feel for what she's thinking : (1 votes)
    5 %
    Hold off on booking anything until you (or she) get engaged : (3 votes)
    15 %
    Other : (0 votes)
  • Post # 3
    Member
    3788 posts
    Honey bee
    • Wedding: July 2011

    Just because you suspect they’ll be getting engaged doesn’t mean 1.) that they really are going to presently; 2.) that their wedding date will be that close to yours. I think that you should go ahead and pick your date since it seems like you are sort of constrained by the chapel’s availability. Since some people already know that you’re planning your wedding, I don’t think it should be too big a deal. If she does get engaged, I think it would be OK to sort of feel out their idea on dates. If they aren’t thinking close to you, no worries, don’t tell, whatever. If it seems like they are considering dates near yours, I don’t think it would be wrong to tell her that even though you are waiting to announce it or whatever, you already have X date picked out. I mean, you’ll have already booked a chapel by then, so it’s not like she can think you are “stealing” her limelight if you obviously booked it long in advance. And that way she will know which day NOT to pick so that everyone can attend both.  Who knows, you may even already be engaged by then, no?

    Post # 4
    Member
    305 posts
    Helper bee
    • Wedding: June 2010

    i would go ahead and set your date….but you may want to go ahead and make it official. that way you can put it out to everyone when you guys are getting married.

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