Post # 1
Hi Everyone! This is my first post and I hope you can help. Both my FI and I are thinking about eloping because we have kids and think would rather use the money to build a new house instead. Unfortunately, we are getting flack from friends who say we need to have a wedding. Our families tell us to do what we want and that they’ll support us.
Do we need to have a full blown wedding? Are people going to be that disappointed?
Post # 3
You should do what will make the two of you happy. Maybe you can compromise a little bit, by going to the courthouse and then having a small family affair at your (or someone elses) house afterwards. I think wanting a house for your family is a completely valid reason!
Post # 4
Could you go ahead an elope and then have a reception later for all your family and friends?
Post # 5
the only people you should be concerned with are you and your FI.
If you guys are cool with eloping thats all that matters.
My FI and I are eloping and we couldn’t be happier with our choice. We didn’t want to stress over first dance songs, flaky bridesmaids, seating charts, (omg the list could go on and on. ) We wanted the day to be about us and making us happy.
When we get back we are having a big party with about 40 our closest friends in our new house. We are going to wear our wedding outfits, have bbq and cake and dance the night away. (thanks to our DJ friend)
It’s going to be pretty bad ass if I don’t say so myself.
Post # 6
Our thought is that the money we’d spend on food and alcohol could probably buy a jacuzzi spa for the master bathroom or something else just as nice. With kids, we are thinking the money is better invested in a house than a party. But at the same time I hate disappointing people.
Post # 7
Do what’s best for you two. Investing in a house is a much better idea than blowing money on a big party just to make your friends happy. You could always have a joint house-warming and reception/anniversary party later down the road if you wanted.
Post # 8
Do what will make you and your husband happy – don’t worry what anyone else thinks!
That said – if you want to compromise between eloping with just you two and a whole out wedding – you could elope on your own and then have a small reception/celebration sometime later with your family and friends. Then they still get the chance to celebrate with you (which is probably why they want you to have a wedding instead of elope – so they get the chance to celebrate with you).
Post # 9
Definitely do what will make you and your husband happy. I am only now coming to realize that weddings are insanely, ridiculously, unnecessarily expensive and that money could totally be put to better use, especially if you guys have kids!! I would totally elope if my mother didn’t already tell us she’d disown us and it would break her heart.