(Closed) New Engaged and LOST! Help

posted 5 years ago in Logistics
Post # 3
925 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

Bottom line, sweetie, this is YOUR day. Maybe a simple “Yeah, I’ll take that into consideration!” and then a change of topic will suffice for people who are butting in?

Post # 5
75 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

It seems like they are overeager to help – it’s great they are enthusiastic, but always remember its you and your FI’s day! YOU have to be happy with the outcome. 

You could try to offer them a project to help with, maybe something you don’t care as much about, to keep them occupied. 

And of course a polite “Thanks, I’ll keep that in mind!” will work.

Post # 6
3170 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: October 2012

If I were you I would get all of those involved and have a little sit down. Explain that you really appreciate their input but you JUST got engaged and need time to figure out exactly what you want. They should understand that, hopefully.

Post # 8
1465 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 1999

@jenrawson21:  I agree it is important to sit them down and express that you are not ready to plan anything yet. You want to look at some wedding magazines and get some ideas before you start planning. Explain to them you are glad they are excited and want to share in the experience but you just want to enjoy being engaged right now.

Post # 9
1627 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: November 2012

I learned early on that everyone close to you has opinions about how your wedding day should go.  It is very sweet of them to be so excited, but for me it started to cause a lot of pressure and stress.  My solution? Darling Husband and I just worked on plans and ideas together, and I shared very minimal with everyone else.  If I already knew what I wanted for something, then I would tell everyone after it was already planned.  If I wanted honest opinions, then I asked (but that became rare as I talked to Darling Husband about most ideas).  Hope this perspective helps! Congratulations and wishing you happy planning!

Post # 10
3697 posts
Sugar bee

A useful reply to all the “helpful suggestions” you’ll be getting: “Let me think about that.” It buys you time, it allows people to feel that their input has been heard and acknowledged, and ultimately it reminds them that YOU are the one who gets to make the decision.

Post # 11
1221 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: September 2013 - Franklin Plaza

@jwdesiree:  +1 It’s your day not there’s.  Do want you want.  Just do it politely.

Post # 12
1832 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: January 2013

I agree with others, take their hard work into “consideration”, and let them know what you decide, or show them other ideas that you like. In the end its your decision. Small budget, big budget, its You and Your fiances day!

Post # 13
182 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: March 2013

@MadTownGirl:  +1


I was married briefly 10 years ago when I was 20. Everyone just sort of planned everything themselves, and I just let it happen. I didn’t even really pick my own dress.

This time around I am keeping everything between me and my fiance. I don’t mention anything on Facebook, and I have a private Pinterest board just for “for sure” wedding things so I can see how everything looks together. Only my Future Mother-In-Law has seen my dress, I only shared the venue after it was booked, etc…

I usually just tell people we want them to be surprised and enjoy their time as our guest. It works…most of the time 🙂

Good luck!!


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