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I think a smaller, more low-key wedding with your dad there would be worth more than any fancy wedding you could ever have. I am super close with my dad, and I can't imagine how hard this is for you. I don't know what else to say.
I'm really sorry to read about your situation and truly can't imagine the position you are in.
Even though having a big wedding is what you both want, have you considered having a secret wedding with just your parents and his parents at city hall and then going to a really nice restaurant after that has dancing?
Then you can still plan a wedding, but you know that your Dad was able to be with you on your real wedding day.
Just don't live with regrets. You can do many things in his memory if he doesn't make it to your wedding day to honor his life. On the bright side, he might get to see you be married twice!
I'm so sorry for your situation. Is there any way that you can have a small intimate family only wedding now and then do a reception for an anniversary later on. It doesn't really sound like you would be able to pull together the money to have a huge wedding now (and you might not even get a job next year with the economy being so sucky so you can't really assume that you would have one and be able to afford a wedding then). You don't mention what your BF does. Is he working? Has he been saving any money at all?
I am so sorry about your situation. Some women have had a small, private ceremony with their dying parent present, and later had a larger ceremony with all of their guests present. That option would combine both of your wishes, assuming that your bf is ready to get married now, and the money is the only issue making him want to wait.
I am so sorry to hear about your father; prayers to you and your family to find peace in this difficult time :(
I would feel the exact same way as you so I completely see where you are coming from.
Maybe you could just have a small church (or wherever you want to say your vows) wedding for your close friends and immediate family within the next year. Your father would have the chance to walk you down the aisle and be with you on your special day.
You and your FH could always save for a larger reception and/or vow renewal to be held later with extended family and friends. There is nothing wrong with that and I know your loved ones would understand.
There is no sense in doing things the 'traditional' way if you will not be happy with the outcome. Judging from how you have expressed yourself in this post, it sounds like this is very important to you and something you might regret if you forgo it. I say go for it... Have a small celebration just to celebrate your marriage, and give your father the chance to share it with you.
So sorry again for your father's illness... I wish him wellness and peace :(
I would get married now. I would save as much as you can right now and if you need a little more, as long as you're reasonably confident in your job prospects upon graduation, if I was in your position, i would have no issue with going out and getting a small loan to help out. You'll probably have to scale things back a bit, but I would say it'd be worth it.
Would you ever look back and wish "you know--i wish I'd had a fancier ring (that can be upgraded later if you like) and a bigger party later, even if my dad couldn't be there"? OR Would you look back and be like "yea i had this great party, but i wish I hadn't waited so my dad could be there."
That is a terrible situation. I am so sorry for you. I hope you guys can figure something out so your dad can see you get married to the love of your life!
Oh sweetie, I'm so sorry. I can't even imagine what you are feeling right now. The other Bees gave the same suggestion I am going to offer, maybe a small wedding at home with very close family and friends, just who you would include in your bridal party maybe(?) then doing a big party after you've saved up? Have you talked to your BF about it? Maybe to save on costs you could do a wedding band at the ceremony then wait and save up for a special engagement ring for the party later on? Again, I am so sorry you have to think about things like this. Please keep posting, we'll keep supporting!!!
I'm so sorry that you are in this situation-- it must be so hard on you and your family. I lost my Dad when I was 7 and I lost my mom when I was 21 after an extended 4 year illness, and I would give anything to have them come to my wedding, even if I was planning a much, much smaller affair than I am. The bride and groom clearly care the most about their wedding, but their parents are a very close second and planning a wedding without having them in my corner and checking in about the wedding has been hard. I would do whatever you can to make sure your Dad gets to be with you when you are married, especially when it seems like you and your bf are in a stable relationship and ready to be married.
Stay strong and hang in there! Your father is in my thoughts!
Hi, I'm sorry to hear about your Dad, I hope for the best for you. Here is my suggestion, since tomorrow isn't promise to anyone. Why not have a small ceremony with family. I understand money is an issue, so find a dress that you can afford. Your BF can check rings at this website www.weddingbands.com very good prices for all budgets.
Family members can make dinner dishes and serve at a family members home. You can rent tuxedos/bridesmaid dresses ... remember keep it small 2-3 bridesmaids the most. Where there's a will there's a way. This website among others offers great ideas and suggestions. If you Dad has some time left plan your wedding to take place in the next three-four months.
I wish you and your family well.
love_avatar_0379_www.free-avatars.com..jpg (13.6 KB, 28 downloads) 1 year old 
First, whiteorchid, I am so, so sorry about your father's diagnosis. I'll keep you and your family in my thoughts. My father passed away when I was a teenager, so I have deep empathy for what you are going through and I truly wish that your situation was different.
When my Mom remarried a few years ago, we were in a similar situation with her father (my Pop). He went from being totally healthy seeming to a cancer diagnosis and immediate hospitalization. The doctors had no idea if it would be a month or maybe a year. This was in January. Mom had planned to be married in May, but knew that Pop would not likely make it. She also felt that she needed to have him there. She and her fiance (my stepdad) decided to have two weddings. They kept the May wedding on the calendar and did a simple wedding at the hospital in February. The hospital let us use a nice conference room, which we set up prettily for the ceremony. Immediate family members came. We had flowers, a little champagne, and my grandpa's favorite cake. It was small and inexpensive, but meant the world to everyone that Pop could be there. It meant the world to him to see my mom happy and settled in her "new" life. By the time May came, my Pop had indeed passed on. The May wedding included a ceremony and reception, and it was nice to have something happy to celebrate after losing Pop.
Maybe you and your BF could consider something similar--hold a small and inexpensive ceremony now with your father and select family members/friends, but still plan and save for a larger celebration later.
This is what worked for them and us. I know it might not work for you, but I wanted to offer it as an idea. Again, I am so sorry for your father's illness and I'll keep you all in my thoughts.
Whiteorchid, I'm so very sorry. I don't really have any advice, because I can't begin to imagine what you're going through. My only real suggestion is that maybe you and your fiance can talk about putting off getting a ring for now (since they can be expensive and it sounds like that might be a concern), and maybe start thinking about holding a small wedding sometime sooner than you planned so that you can do all the special things you'd like to have your dad there for. Weddings can be done on fairly tight budgets, and I'm sure everyone here would be very happy to help with any ideas and advice you might want. But much more importantly, of course, I'm sure we'll all be thinking of you and your family. You've got a lot of virtual shoulders to lean on here if you need it.
I think you should push up your wedding date. Family is most important, and sometimes that means letting go of what our plans are or what our dream is.
You can plan and execute a wedding in only 6 months (I did). Here's some tips:
Overall: Keep it small and intimate. Immediate family, a couple friends.
For the ring: I'd recommend finding a setting you really like and putting a CZ, moissonite, or white sapphire in the centerstone instead of buying a diamond. Your FI can save for a diamond later.
For the venue: a local park with a great background, maybe a local lake. Scenery makes up for lack of decoration, so you don't need to decorate the ceremony at all if you pick a pretty location. You also don't necessarily need chairs.
For the reception: have a local restaurant cater some food. Make your own centerpieces (lots of ideas in the DIY board!). If you have any friends who like to bake cakes, ask them to decorate your wedding cake for you. Or simply order a plain cake from the grocery bakery and decorate it yourself with some (non-toxic) flowers from the florist section of the grocery.
For the dress: ebay is great, and chinese replicas are a good idea too.
Flowers: Keep it simple. Just the bride's bouquet, get a nice one from the grocery florist.
A wedding can be beautiful and memorable and done for only $1000. Hope that helps! I'm so sorry to hear about your dad. I hope that they are able to treat him and that he responds well to treatment.
It's okay to not have a big wedding - a wedding is about the two of you being committed to each other in front of friends and family. It sounds like you're pretty committed. Find a gazebo in a park, or a friend's house, or something equally inexpensive. Pick out simple rings - even silver is fine, and a simple silk dress, rent the bf a tux or buy a suit, get a friend ordained online. I think it will be all the more special because it's just about you, not the big wedding. Perhaps you can go some place that has jazz or big band afterward for dancing.
My mom just got through breast cancer and has the all clear. If I thought there was even a chance she wouldn't make it to the wedding we would have flown up to visit them and gotten married immediately.
ps for rings it occurs to me that the etsy seller making ours does the same patterns in silver as in white gold, but way cheaper, so you could upgrade later without changing the look or feeling; you could even do a cz or sapphire now and upgrade to a similar diamond later
I'm so so sorry about your dad. It's a very hard thing for anyone to get a cancer diagonsis. I'd have a real heart to heart with your honey. If you both know that you want to marry one another I don't see why you'd want to wait. The thing is, every day is a gift but many of us forget about it until something happens to reopen our eyes. If you spend $1000 or $50,000 at the end of the day it's just a wedding... it's not about flowers, favors, or the perfect centerpiece. It's about marrying your best friend and making a lifetime commiment. If it was me, I'd just want an intimate ceremony and maybe reception at someone's home or maybe a backyard wedding and reception with a few family and friends. You don't need to spend lots of money of food and booze... a slice of cake and a campagne toast would be just as sweet. Best of luck and lots of love to you and yours!
Is your bf a law student too? Do you have a summer job lined up? I made enough to pay for a great wedding during mine, but that was before things got really bad with the economy. Try to move it up if you can! You can definitely pull together an awesome wedding in just months, especially if you do it on an off day or during the off season!
I agree, have a loving talk with your sweetie about what to do.
Hugs to you and will keep your dad in my thoughts and prayers. I understand how you are wanting your dad to be there, and yes, a wedding is a day. Make it loving, meaningful, and beautiful and your dad at the center of this celebration.
Nothing but hugs. Things happen sometimes and we wonder why. Sometimes it doesn't make sense. I lost my grandmother last month and she was like a mom to me always. Not having her there is one of the hardest things ever, along with my dad not being there.
If there is a chance you two can do this now, then I say go for it. Again, I pray that he gets better, and can somehow weather the odds.
We're all pulling for you and your family. May you find some peace during this difficult time and know that we're here..and we care.
I'm with the others---this sounds like a situation where you would really regret not having your dad at your wedding. Seems like the only solution is to push things up, and put together a small wedding pronto! You can always throw a big anniversary party/reception a year or two from now.
So sorry for the bad news. I wish you and your family all the best. Please keep us posted.
I'm sorry to hear about your father - really I can't say enough, but that's an awful disease and hopefully it's been caught early enough and he and his family are lucky enough that he can beat the odds.
That said, a wedding can be as little as an officiant, a license, and two witnesses. It sounds like you're very stable and secure in your relationship - that you and your partner know you want to be together and it's only the timing left to work out. Sometimes a wedding with a lot of guests and a big party just isn't what's important. Sometimes waiting until the previously agreed upon time isn't. If you'd rather not leave it up to time and chance, get married with your family. You can always have a bigger wedding later - there's plenty of bees who've done that (sometimes keeping the fact that they were already legal quiet, sometimes not).
Thank you all for your kind messages and advice. I like the idea of finding a place where my dad can actually walk me down the aisle. The other tough thing i'm dealing with is that my bf and I live about 9 hours away from my family, so it would be extremely difficult to plan a wedding from here in such a short time. Plus I have this worry in the back of my mind that because my parents got married at such a later age than I am that they won't even really approve of us getting married now. And I'm afraid to talk to my mom about all this because I don't want her to feel like I think my dad is going to die really soon and give up hope.
@MissAsB: yes, my bf works, but he doesn't get paid terribly much, and with school loans, hasn't been able to save much. I personally have about $2000 saved, and he'll get his bonus next week, which should give us probably an extra $5000. But I really hate for us to use all our savings right now, especially with the economy how it is.
@hisbride2011: No, my bf isn't a law student too. He has a job, but he has been paying off school loans and other bills and hasn't really been saving much. Luckily he gets his bonus next week so that should give him around $4000-6000 extra, which would give him plenty for a ring and left over money for a wedding. I have a summer job, but it's with the federal government and isn't paid, so I'm not really of much help with my $10/hr research assistant position! :(
This whole situation just makes me miserable. I feel bad for my bf too because he has such a large family and I know he wants them there, which wouldn't work with a small ceremony.
Thank you all again for your responses.
Would it be possible to have a small-ish ceremony and then a larger vow-renewal party a few years later? Take care!
First of all, honey it breaks my heart about your dad. I agree, you don't want to assume your dad is going to pass away soon but, like you said, you just really don't know with that kind of cancer. If I were in your situation I would talk to my FI, take what the girls have said because I think they are some fabulous ideas. If he is on board, and really stress about your dad, then talk to your parents. Don't say it's only because you dad is going to pass sooner rather than later---as in many years from now. If they know your relationship and how you feel about each other I would hope they would understand and also the position you are in to make sure you dad sees you get married and he walks you down the aisle. I would also limit the small wedding day to immediate family (parents, siblings, grandparents and only aunts/uncles/cousins if the numbers aren't too high) and go from there. You don't have to have a dinner, do tasty desserts that people can bring and lots of different beverages (probably not alcohol since you won't have a lot of food to help balance things out) and have music playing to add ambiance. Still have that first dance and still have that father/daughter dance. Get someone to take photos. Or see if you can get a photographer for like two hours or something. I bet if you explain the situation to vendors, within reason for what you are asking for them to do, I'm sure they would love to help out and make it happen for you.
Please keep us posted! ::hugs::
Hugs and Prayers. I hope you are able to work something out. I think a small wedding now and a larger wedding later after you graduate would be nice. In additon to being sure your dad can witness your wedding now, a wedding now could benefit you health insurance and tax wise. I think the most important thing here is for everyone to communicate their feelings.
P.S. My Father-in-law was diagonosed two weeks after our wedding with agressive prostrate cancer, so I can only imagine just a bit what you are going thru.
I'm so sorry to hear about your father.
While circumstances were way different, I shot (I'm a photographer) an awesome wedding this past weekend. It was small and intimate (literally, the couple, officiant, and myself) on the beach. Family have already been gushing over the images.
The groom is being deployed this weekend, and their planning another wedding for Nov. after he returns. They're not changing names, they didn't exchange rings, and are saving most "wedding stuff" for the "big" wedding. She got a dress off the sales rack at Davids (which was actually really gorgeous) and they got married! They just really wanted to be "married" before he deploys in case of worst case scenario, as she wouldn't be able to get any info on him if something happened....
In your case, I would rec. the same thing, especially if you're already possibly live together and you're ready for that commitment. I would throw a REALLY cheap simple wedding for just your close family, and make sure you hire a really good photographer. While I hate to say this, that would probably be your last opportunity to get "fun" awesome pictures with your father. I can't tell you how many times my clients talk about how much pictures of a recently passed family member mean to them. And if I know a family member is sick I make a special effort to document THEM at the wedding just as much as the bride and groom. If it's just going to be small and short, in your circumstance most would probably do it for the same fee as a portrait session (especially if not on a Saturday) and that would mean you could get a world class photographer for under $240-400 most likely. That's the ONE thing I would suggest not cheaping out on. Find the photographer of your dreams, grab your boyfriend (maybe soon fiance? ;-), grab your dad and walk down that aisle. I know you'll treasure those images for the rest of your life, and they can make a great addition to a "larger" wedding or party down the line.
I'll say a prayer for your family...
Screw the big wedding and the ring, and get married NOW so your dad can be there. I wish I would have done the same.
You have great advice so far, and I want to second that no big wedding can possibly replace your father's presence, and as KLP2010 noted, great fun photos with your dad. That is truly precious.
Go for it now. Choose something fun, maybe a destination wedding, where you can truly enjoy this time. My FI's uncle recently passed, and as odd as this is to say, I think his family took the best approach ever to such a tragedy: gather, have fun, enjoy. They had almost everyone come out for a vacation in his last summer, precious time.
Throw the big event as an anniversary party. Everyone will understand. Food + booze + dancing + good memories, people will come and it will be special.
I'm so sorry about your father. I lost mine 7yrs ago, although not because of an illness, but I understand how you are feeling right now.
I say talk to your BF and see how he feels about it moving the date up. Something small, just immediate family.
((((hugs)))
You might be surprised at your parents' reactions. I got the same speach from my parents, they were 29 and 30 when they got married and really drilled the waiting-until-established into my head as well so I was very hesitant to tell them. (I was only 25.) Turns out they were thrilled for me. It's really about the right person, not the right age. They'll probably recognize that as well.
I definitely agree with all the others that it can be done on a small budget and in a short amount of time. In fact, if I had a do-over I would probably go smaller/cheaper/simpler anyways. Have you seen: http://2000dollarwedding.com/?
Good luck and I am so sorry about your father. Wishing you guys all the best!
I am so sorry to hear about your dad. When I was 16, my dad was also diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. I know how tough it is to watch someone die from this horrible disease. I know that every patient is different, but my dad was diagnosed on Jan 7th, 2002 and died on April 2, 2010. It is seriously the hardest thing that I have ever been through in my life. I know that you want your daddy at your wedding, but I would advise you against planning a wedding now. My advice would be to spend every second you possibly can with your dad. He is going to need a lot of care soon, and nothing will be more rewarding to you than spending time with him and helping to care for him. The tough part for me to share is that soon he will be taking a lot of very serious pain killers. When my dad was on these medications, he was not the same person I had known a year before. You could tell that he was very sick. It was hard for my dad to walk down the hall, let alone attend any events. Please know that my prayers are with you and your family. If you have any others questions or just want to chat privately, please message me.
oh thats so sad, im really sorry, like the other bees said have a small low key wedding, talk to you BF about how sensitive you are about the situation he loves you and will understand, start planning girl, this is a big deal to you and your dad and you both should share that moment together
@whiteorchid: I am so incredibly sorry for all that you and your family are going through. I will be sure to say a prayer for you and for your dad - I know that every little bit helps! My advice is going to echo the others here - I think against all obstacles that you should find a way to have a small wedding - you, your SO, your immediate family and his immediate family - so that your dad can be there. I also think that you have a great opportunity to have your mom help you plan the small wedding - this could be something awesome for her, too, to help take her mind off of the negative news she's had to face and give her a break to do something fun and joyful. Like others here (and I'm sorry to those of you who have lost one or both of your parents), my Daddy was killed in a car accident when I was 10 years old. It's been incredibly difficult for me, and I can tell you this with certainty - I have been to A LOT of weddings in my life, and while I am honestly over-the-moon happy for each and every couple whose wedding I've witnessed, I always have a twinge of pain and jealousy when they get walked down the aisle and as they dance their father/daughter dance. You have the chance to have that, and I think you should take it - I know you won't regret it! Just move quickly, keep the stress down, enjoy your love and your family, and take lots of pictures...the memories will be sure to make you smile whenver you think of them!
P.S. - you do have all of us here to help you along - we're here for you.
I can't imagine how difficult this situation is for you, and I'm so sorry you have to go through it. As others have said, I'd get married now in a small intimate ceremony. You can always have a bigger shindig later as an anniversary party (you shouldn't feel weird about it, everyone would understand). God willing, youd dad will be there to celebrate that too!!
My dad was diagnosed with beginning signs of emphysema while I was in college. One of my biggest fears was that he wouldn't be there to walk me down the aisle or to hold my children. Fortunately my dad was able to quit smoking, and we've been blessed that (knock on wood) his condition hasn't worsened significantly; but it's still something that has continually played on my mind. You can always throw a big party, and you can always upgrade a ring. You can't replace the memories of having your father there for such a profound moment of your life.
I'm so sorry to hear about your father. I can't imagine how much that hurts. I agree with some of the other posts. You should have a smaller wedding. Its obvious that your father is very important to you, so don't get distracted by the other things that seem important. A beautiful venue, pretty flowers, alcohol, those are important to some people, but in the end, family is the priority. That's what you need there the most. And like others have said, you can always do something awhile after.
I'm so sorry again.
I'm sorry to hear about your father.
I think you should just have a small, quick wedding that your dad can attend. Get simple, inexpensive gold bands and just have some cake and punch at their house or something. Invite your family. Just make it a memorable day. Hell, order some pizza or pasta from a nearby italian restaurant and just have it at home in the backyard.
Having your dad there is more important; just keep it simple. Keep it simple and there is no 'planning' needed. If getting married and having your dad there is your first priority, forget the rest of the stuff. It won't matter
So sorry about your dad!
Courthouse/very small wedding with bands, no e-ring and dad there. Perhaps a teeny reception brunch afterwards with dancing for the daddy-daughter dance? Save the big ring and big wedding for when you are ready.
I'm so sorry to hear about your Dad. If there is ever a post that anyone ever listens to or ever take advice from I hope it's this one. I was not blessed with an amazing father at birth however I was VERY fortunate enough to find someone in my life to fill that space that my biological father could not. My father figure was an amazing man. He taught me so much about understanding my self and learning about how to be treated by a man but most importantly I would not be an 1/8th of the woman I am today without him. He was diagnosed with a very rare form of leukemia, he was given an 80% chance survival rate and fought REALLY hard for 8 years. At the end of the 8th year his prognosis got very very bad. He was given 6 months to live. He fought another 2 years before losing his battle. When that diagnosis came from the doctors the first thing I thought of was who will walk me down the aisle? Who will I have a father daughter dance with when we do get married? My FI and I knew a few weeks into our relationship that we'd get married eventually (we've been together almost 6 1/2 years now) but we wanted to be smart then when things took a turn for the worse we didn't know what to do. We decided we should be "smart" and wait. We thought that he wouldn't want us getting married just because he was sick (which wasn't really the case but we were concern with that being the focus of it). That was the BIGGEST mistake we ever made. After his death we both realized it just didn't matter it matters having the ones you love there at your wedding sharing in your love and happiness, that not only is it about the love between the two of you but also between the relationships that help you grow as a couple.
We finally decided to get married and stop waiting for there to be enough money. We still don't have enough money, the ironic thing is we would have had more money then if we hadn't waited but what can you do, things happen that you can never plan for. The thing is this whole process has been somewhat heart breaking because there's an empty spot during all this planning process simply because he's not here. The advice that I would go to him for he's not there to get. There's an empty whole in my heart and nothing is going to fill it. FI feels it to, one of the saddest things he's EVER said to me was after a memorial for him, he just said he felt like the biggest asshole for not marrying me before he passed away. I think I fell in love with him all over again after he said that.
Have a wedding who says it needs to be small? Have the people you want there but don't have a $2000 gown. Get rings that can be upgraded at a later date (this is also so romantic), have a reception where you serve cheese and wine and veggies and cake only (you could do Sangria to make it even more fun and to enable you to use any kind of cheap wine), have your FI wear a suit he already owns, have the flowers be simple, make your own bouquet it's shockingly simple hit up youtube for DIY videos, use roses or something special for yours but use baby's breath or something very inexpensive for your BM's and centerpieces, there are so many ways to cut costs and make it beautiful. Plus once people find out what's happening you will be shocked how many friends step up and offer a ton of help! Good luck and don't make a decision you will regret, think over this very carefully and make sure you're ok with the choice.
I am so sorry to hear about your Dad - I will be thinking of you and your family!
I think everyone has been pretty spot on - I know you mentioned you were worried about your mum thinking it meant that you thought he was going to die soon, but perhaps you can have a chat to her about how nothing is more important than family and you want to make absolutely sure that your dad is with you when you get married. I know it would be hard to plan a wedding from 9 hours away - but why not hire a coordinator to do the running around for you and find a pretty garden or hall for you to get married in?
Best of luck
I am so sorry to hear about your dad's illness. My dad died of cancer when I was 10. By the time they found it he was stage IV so he basically had no chance. I like the idea of having a small wedding with close family and friends now. Everyone always says I wish I had had a more low key wedding and it's so important to have your dad there. Talk to your BF about it and maybe you can work with it. You don't need your dream ring now, you can always upgrade!
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Hi everyone! I've been reading the weddingbee boards for a while, but this is my first post. I hope you all can give me some advice. Sorry for the long post!
My bf and I have been together for 4 years now. I'm 24 and he's 25 about to be 26. My parents got married in their 30s and have always encouraged me to wait until I was established with my career before I get married, and so my plan has always been to get engaged at 25 and married at 26. I'm in law school right now and will graduate next year, so that would give my a year to plan the wedding and I would hopefully have a job during that time, instead of being a poor law student. My bf has wanted to propose since year 2 of our relationship, but after I explained to him that I wanted to wait and how much weddings and rings cost, now he really wants to wait until then as well.
The problem: my dad was just diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. If any of you know about pancreatic cancer, you know that it's basically a death sentence. To give you some statistics, only 5% of pancreatic cancer patients live 5 years, only 25% even live ONE YEAR. My dad, fortunately was diagnosed at stage II, which means that he'll likely live a year, but still has only a 6% chance of making it to 5 years. And who knows? the cancer could come back tomorrow, and he could be gone in a couple months. Most pancreatic cancer patients live only 3-6 months.
I NEED my dad at my wedding. Everytime I think of him not being there, of me not getting a father-daughter dance, I just break down. My bf hasn't been saving for the ring yet though because he wasn't planning to propose for like a year and a half. We also have no money for a wedding because i'm still in school. He wants to still wait and get married in like 2 1/2 years, but I'm scared my dad won't be alive then.
any advice? thank you in advance.