(Closed) Newbee intro and needing advice :)

posted 6 years ago in Waiting
Post # 3
4429 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@witchbaby:  i feel for you that your going thru this waiting sucks ; (

4 years is a long time to wait i knoe ive been there.

i dont feel you should have moved in with him till you had the ring.

and even then sometimes men will give a women a “shut up ring”

ive been given 3 of them there calles promise rings.

i dont think you should talk to him about it again for a while.

give yourself a timeline not him and stick to your guns.

set it for your self in a year lets say if things are going nowhere move out!

if he really loves you he wont let you walk out.

i just think from my experience 4 years is a long time and he wont really talk about marriage

hes a long way from engagement i wish i would have known this in my 20s lol.

I’ve been in 3 of them 4year relationships and got a shut up ring every time.

but me and fi were dating for 1year and 10 months and he popped the ?and we talked about marriage very lil but even he said if a man doesn’t know within a year to 2 years its not good.

i hope hes wrong for you ; )

do a pole on here how long were you dating your bf before he popped the question.

blessings and good luck!

Post # 4
170 posts
Blushing bee

Stick with Mr.Bee’s plan.It sound slike you’re about to have a whole lot of time to drive yourself crazy. Keep Busy!


Sorry I don’t have anything more for you.

Post # 5
331 posts
Helper bee
  • Wedding: July 2013

From my experience, I try to periodically check in. Now it seems like we are talking about it all the time and seem to be moving in that direction, but for the last year or so (since we moved in together) and right before we moved in together I had some serious sit-downs with him. My SO is pretty cool with these convos–in fact he was the one that 3 months in to our relationship said “hey…you are not going to scare me if you talk about the future.”

I feel like as long as you don’t come at him with hard and fast deadlines, but say I was hoping to be married by x or engaged by y —are we even close to being on the same page? Or say…I just need to know marriage is “on your radar” (the exact phrase I used) in the next 2-3 years. I just always eased into it gently, without an accusatory “you don’t love me” type vibe. Everyone is different and you know your SO better than I do. This is based off my experience, but I would definitely find some way to verify you are on the same page. 


Good luck!!

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