- 8 years ago
- Wedding: November 2012
I am a 26 year old (female) from London UK. Having lurked (i think that’s what you call it!) on the site for a few months I feel now is the time to share my story and vent my frustration for waiting!!
Over the years I’ve “googled” for relationship advice and have read many stories on various relationship websites which have all helped me in times of crisis.
I have been the girl who was in a long term relationship ( with him for 5 years- we were young and grew apart) I have been the girl who was cheated on (the high school sweetheart reunited, who turned out to be an a$$hole) and I have been the girl who has dated a-plenty to find someone special!… So you can’t claim that I haven’t had my share of experience.
I write now as an older, dare I say it -more mature- woman who is in a very happy, loving relationship with someone who I have for the first time in my life felt a desire for more…. a long term future…. marriage and children. If I’m honest I felt this way from about 6 months in, but knew asking for him to feel the same was too soon. I also felt like there were relationship milestones we needed to reach before I could reasonable expect him to feel the same, to name a few I felt that we should have:
– Shared a year together, enjoying all the seasons without any pressure
– Met each others families
– had a row that could make or break us and worked through it.
– Met each others friends, been on holiday and have been to a wedding together.
– Lived together.
We have now done all these things and I now feel so so ready to get to the next stage and get married. The marriage thing for me is not about the ring or about the day, I just long to be Mrs waitingweddingBe. The pride of being his wife, the pride of showing to the world that the relationship we have isn’t just for show, its so real and so full of love….
But then here is the crushing part…. Mr. WWB (who is 29) doesn’t seem in any hurry whatsoever. I avoid any wedding pressure as I can so see how this kills the romance but every few months or so I cave in and have to see “where he stands” on the whole thing.
His response ranges from “Its the money” (we are saving for a house at the moment) to “We’ve only been together for 2 years”- (2 years this month)… which irrates me so much since I measure a relationship by the way its grown rather than the amount of time you’ve been together! What difference will another 2 years wait do for us, I don’t understand!!
Every now and then he says something promising like “when we get married” and “a ring isn’t a million miles away” but generally he does’t verbalise his feelings but we always joke about our kids and when we get old so I’m under no illusion that he’s thinking long term but the wait is what’s bugging me here!
I’m a traditional person so I won’t dare ask him to marry me and I want to be married before I have children and when people ask why I’m so “desprate” to get married I sometimes find it hard to justify without sounding like I’m being unreasonable!
The bottom line is I love him and going to the next step just feels so right and even though I don’t have any specific questions to ask you fellow waiting bees, keeping it all locked up is driving me crazy so I’ve decided to share!! Thanks for reading this far if you have!…