- 2 years ago
Hi ladies! I’ve been lurking on the boards for a few months, and I figured its time to say hi! I’m definetly stuck on that wait list, firmly in the girlfriend zone, but Mr. Bear and I have had many a conversation about weddings and houses and babies, oh my. He knows where the perfect ring is, and I know he’s gonna try for it or at least something similar (it’s waaaay more than we should spend but I’m in love with it). The only catch is I have no idea when he’ll finally pop the question. Could be this summer, could be a couple years yet. Anyways. We’ve actually gone as far as to mention a budget to each other and set savings goals.
It seems like he’s most comfortable staying around $10k, including everything (rings, honeymoon, ect) and that amount is contingent on us having an equal amount saved for a down payment. I’d like to spend $16k, half on the wedding, half on the honeymoon, because I currently manage all the finances and feel we could ramp up our monthly saving to have $30000 within 2 years (half of which is for the house).
Now. Here’s my idea for a budget breakdown. After much discussion, I feel the rings and honeymoon should be our biggest spends. After all, the rings are with you forever, and they honeymoon is all about us, whereas I see the wedding becoming totally about the families (which is still cool). But I feel like if I can’t have my dream ring I’d rather just get something that good enough and splurge on something awesome for 10yrs. Mr Bear has little opinion on where to spend, as long as a good time is had by all. My percentages are way off “the recommended” so I’m curious if I sound crazy – will I regret not splurging on a professional photog or a band? will our grandmas feel cheaper out on, being the proper society girls that they are? will we miss the whole wedding dinner official-ness?
We’re thinking an in the park picnic, mid-morning swingin’ brunch
About 80 guests – could easily be 120, right now almost all close family, struggling with whether to invite cousins, kids and +1s
Stationary – $100 DIY
Rings – $1000 (dream ring is $5000-7000 depending on store sale cycle, yeah right!!!)
Dress – $200
Suit – $200
Other attire -$400 (splitting with wedding party, shoes, veil, ect)
Ceremony, inc fees -$300
Venue – $100 donation, $100-200 for picnic blankets/benches for older folks
table decor – $200
Catering – $1200 ($12pp + taxes, tips)
Alcohol -$300 (punch, mimos, beer & wine)
Cake – $0 (homemade desserts, gift from lovely family ladies)
flowers – $100 (Bouquets only, bought day of)
Photo/videographer – $300 (3 different friends of the groom, $100 thank you gift each)
classic rental car – $250
rehersal dinner – $300
= $5350 wedding total
($10k with dream ring, yo vey!)
Honeymoon – $8000 (3 weeks in SE Asia)
So far, no favors, no dj (we’d love a swing band, but can we afford it… Hmmm?), I’m doing my own hair and makeup, we’re getting ready at families houses so no need to pay for hotels, no bachelor/ bachelorette parties.
In my mind, I still have about $2000 to play with. Do I slush fund it? Add it to an existing category? Is there some expense I’m leaving out?
*OR* Do I scrimp even more, up the budget by a couple grand and go for that dream ring?
Thank god for anybody who hung in there, I know that was a raged of a long post. Any advise ido much appreciated!