Post # 1
So I might be over protective and over reacting or something but I will let you bees tell me what I am… my friend just had a baby a week ago via c-section and the day she got out of the hospital she went to a restuarant because she was dying for a drink, and within this week everyday she is out doing something what that new baby. Last night is when I flipped out on her in public… so yesterday morning she wrote on her facebook that Cambria isnt feeling well and might have to take her to the dr because she is running a temp, so last night I go to the nail salon to get my nails done, and I am almost done and in she walks with the baby. Cambria is 1 week old today, and she asks me how im doing and my family, small talk blah blah blah. I ask her how she is doing and how Cambria is and she tells me Im good I feel fabulous after my c-section, and tells me Cambria is sick. I had enough at the point, I flipped out on her and said, “well ya know she wouldnt be sick if you didnt take her out all day everyday, she is a newborn Alyssa, you cant be taking her out yet, youre not even supposed to be driving yet because of your meds, nor drinking. Why cant you just stay home for a few weeks so you can rest and heal and Cambria can get used to being home. I’m sure your nails can wait a few weeks, along with all the restaurants you have been too, im pretty sure they will be in the exact same spot in 2 weeks.” She than told me to mind my own business and what she does with her baby is her business. I told her well when you post everything on facebook about where you are with Cambria people are going to judge you because she is a newborn and she needs to be home not out running around. She told me Im jealous of her because she has a girl and I dont and blah blah blah. I then told her to stop being a POS mom and stay home with her newborn instead of exposing her to everything within the first week, and a newborn shouldnt even be in a nail salon because of the fumes. I walk out just furious and now this morning she has on her facebook, “Yay lets give Amanda the mother of the year award because she shelters her kids and wants to tell me how to raise my kids.” So I reply with a simple “No Alyssa im not trying to tell you how to raise your kids its called common sense. Stay the hell home with your newborn she doesnt need to be on the go constantly and you wonder why she is sick, DUH hello keep your ass home then she wouldnt be sick” 30 people liked what I wrote and everyone agreed with me. Now she is like everyone hates me and sympathy, sympathy, sympathy, blah, blah, blah.
I know after I had my kids I didnt want to do anything for at least a week much less go to a park and get my nails done, and I didnt take my kids out in public for at least the first 3 weeks unless it was to a dr appt. Am I wrong for telling her something? When did you start taking your newborns out in public??
Post # 3
I’ve always been told babies are born with better immune systems than we have. It’s her choice. It’s likely my baby will be travelling within the first 2 weeks. Not worried about it.
Post # 4
I think of parenting as one of those “don’t say anything unless you’re asked for your opinion” topics. I wouldn’t have said anything if I were you, but that’s just me.
Post # 5
It is a personal decision on the parent if they are to be taking their child out in public the first week of life and it reflects poorly on you for flipping out on her.
For us personally we were told to limit contact with the public due to our muchkin was a premie. Huge difference though from full term to preterm baby…
We were in the hospital a month before muchkin came home, and to be honest within the first week of coming home, we did do a store run with just muchkin and I. However I did not let the general public near him.
It is not your place to say how she raises her child.
Post # 6
Well it seems like your friend is a multifaceted issue. Taking your baby out is one thing. Not taking a sick baby to a doctor is another. Drinking, driving while on medication is another thing.
I realize you frustration! Unfortunately she will only become more indignant with your plights! If its really becoming dangerous you could call DCF. Sorry, I wish I had more advice!
Post # 7
Like most issues between friends, both of you need to act a little more maturely.
Post # 8
i agree with the PP that it is a personal decison. moms are entitled to make those decisions for their babies! But i’ll add my opinion – I probably won’t be taking my child out and about that early! but that’s just me!
Post # 9
I forgot to mention the baby is on Oxygen because she smoked almost a pack a day while she is pregnant.
Post # 10
Holy drama. I would stay out of this. It’s not your place to tell someone else how to parent their child unless they ask for your advice.
Post # 11
There are things that some parents do that I don’t agree with but unless it is something that is obviously lifethreatening it is best not to say anything because it is really isn’t anyones place to tell a parent how to raise thier children. And even if you may have a good point, any parent will likely just get upset when you tell them they are parenting wrong.
Post # 13
Yes, you are wrong for telling her off. To be honest, I don’t see what the problem is with taking a newborn out in public. My friend brought her newborn to universty classes & she turned out awesome: All they do is sleep anyway.
I feel like this whole back & forth isn’t really the classiest. Maybe your ‘friend’ isn’t making the best decisions but badmouthing her on the internet is bringing you down to her level in my books.
Post # 14
amanda923: Yea…so you are kinda really in the wrong here, sorry.
Post # 15
OMG, I completely agree with you, I’m horrified by this story. I didn’t take my baby boy out in public for over a month after he was born (which may have been a little extreme, I know, but that’s me, lol). At least you know you tried to set your friend straight, and unless she outright abuses or neglects her child there isn’t a lot more you can do.
Post # 16
I would have stayed out of it. Just like she said, it’s not really any of your business. Sure she should stay home with the baby for a couple weeks, but you have no right to actually tell her that. If you think it’s wrong, do the opposite w/ your kids (which you have). Baby’s are pretty tough and can handle more than what people give them credit for.