(Closed) Newly engaged and the drama begins…

posted 8 years ago in Family
Post # 3
Member
457 posts
Helper bee

You need to just be honest with her, sounds like you are close with her and you all get along, so just be up front , and tell her she will def be included, however, you want everyone to be included and at this point you don’t even know what you like and don’t like so you want to figure out that first and you will keep her informed of what you need help with.

Post # 4
Member
2201 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: August 2010

And if that doesn’t work – talk to your dad and say that while you appreciate all his GF’s ideas, you feel like she’s trying to take over, and let him rein her in.

Post # 5
Member
165 posts
Blushing bee

How is your relationship with your dad?  Might be helpful if you could talk to him about wanting her to back off but not wanting to hurt her feelings…ask for his advice & maybe he’ll step in and help reign her in.  I would probably find something to assign her that you’re ok with her handling (favor ideas/research) and will help her feel important (and help you check a to-do off your list).

Post # 6
Member
1752 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2010

I think that maybe the best thing for people like that, is to give them something to plan.  Let her plan the wedding shower, or let her plan the signature drink, pick the alcohol, or let her plan the big exit.

If you give them things to work on, they feel involved w/o getting in the middle of everything.

There is always a chance that she will try to push herself on everything.  It will get annoying, but you have a place here to vent as often as needed.  It’s important to take it all in stride, and when you get in arguments, as you most likely will (I did with my mother).  Think about what you said, appologize for everything that was an over reaction, and tell her how you feel.

If she gets too overwhemling, you have to tell her, but tell her nicely.  You don’t want to step on toes, it just gives people sour tastes in their mouths – and causes drama.

Post # 7
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree with Ella, give her something to do that the “real” moms are happy to let go of. It might be worth having a big family meeting with everyone around the table and then sort out who is going to do what. That way she is involved, and so is everyone else.

I think talking to your dad would be useful too, because at the end of the day she isn’t in charge and if she isn’t told she may just carry on regardless.

Hope it all goes well x

Post # 8
Member
20 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: January 2011

I agree with Ella, give her something to do that the “real” moms are happy to let go of. It might be worth having a big family meeting with everyone around the table and then sort out who is going to do what. That way she is involved, and so is everyone else.

I think talking to your dad would be useful too, because at the end of the day she isn’t in charge and if she isn’t told she may just carry on regardless.

Hope it all goes well x

The topic ‘Newly engaged and the drama begins…’ is closed to new replies.

Find Amazing Vendors