Newly engaged – postpone wedding?

posted 1 week ago in Engagement
Post # 16
115 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2017

I wouldn’t wait, expectations don’t always come to fruition, their business may not go as they expect. Parents and grandparents don’t get younger.

Also I would not be happy to have someone pay for the entire wedding. It stops being your wedding and it may be a case of them dictating what you have if they are entirely funding it.

Whatever you decide, huge congrats on your engagement and I wish you both the very best of luck!

(Are there ring pics? 😀 )

Post # 17
2635 posts
Sugar bee

I wouldn’t wait. There is no guarantee their business will be better in the future. Also, it may take some pressure off of them. If they have extra cash in the future, they can gift it to you for a house down payment or whatever (if they want to).

Post # 20
4419 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: September 2010

I 100% would NOT wait. What guarantee do you have that they’ll have the money to pay for it in 2019? They may be expecting their business to do well, but they can’t KNOW that. I wouldn’t want you guys to wait and then have your plans derailed.

My advice to you is my advice to anyone: plan the wedding that you two can comfortably afford. If you get any help, that’s great. You will feel better having control over the event & its timing…at least, I would.

Post # 23
45 posts

When we got engaged last year, my parents told me that if FI and I would wait until 2018, they could pay for everything.  Hearing that was a total moment of clarity because it made FI and I realize that we didn’t give a damn about the wedding.  We just wanted to be married.  So we had planned on eloping and having a picnic for family and friends after we got back from our honeymoon, but neither of our parents were happy with that so they agreed to contribute as much as they could.  We’re having a simple, casual wedding that’s costing around $10K.

My advice is, don’t wait.  You cannot be one hundred percent sure of your FIs parents future financial situation.  And believe me when I say that accepting people’s money comes with strings.  I love my parents, but this wedding is beyond what I wanted simply because they’re funding most of it.  I feel like I have to run every decision by my mom because she’s writing the checks.

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