NFP- reassure me!

posted 3 years ago in Catholic
Post # 3
5697 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

Have you considered getting a non hormonal IUD? Assuming if you’re allowed to take BC, you can take any form? (I asked since you put this in the Catholic boards??)

I would not recommend NFP. It’s no way to live being afraid that you are pregnant every month until you get your period, and it’s definitely not infalliable. (although nothing is)

Post # 4
6963 posts
Busy Beekeeper
  • Wedding: August 2012

If you absolutely do not want to get pregnant I would continue using some form of birth control.

Also, it is not unhealthy to remain on the pill.

Post # 6
2064 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: September 2014

@SoontobeMrsKB:  if you’ve been on the pill to treat acne and long periods, are you concerned about those issues coming back when you go off it? I guess I don’t understand why that would change with marriage…

Post # 9
284 posts
Helper bee

@SoontobeMrsKB:  Yes, used correctly, NFP can be upwards of 99% effective – quite comprable to the Pill 🙂 [] You can also take classes! [] There’s a wealth of information online, too. I taught myself the method and as long as you’re diligent, it’s not too difficult once you get used to it. I’d definitely recommend taking a class and giving yourself a “buffer” of a couple extra days on either side of the fertile period while you’re learning the method and getting used to it. PM me if you’d like to know more details, I’m a big fan of the Sympto-Thermal method of NFP, and I think it’s a very underrated form of avoiding (or achieving!) pregnancy. The coolest thing to me is that it totally works WITH your body, rather than suppressing its natural MO. Anyway, there’s my rant 😉 Good luck!!

Post # 10
3249 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: August 2013

@SoontobeMrsKB:  Much of the information provided is good, but not all of it is true.  That was our experience from the pre-marital course section on this.  So, do your own research, from sources outside the church.  I’m sure there are many knowledgable people on here, but there is no real way to determine who is, and isn’t well educated, and balanced on the subject.  This is an issue on which much disputed information is often shared.  I would seek out information from reliable sources, including reputable health care professionals of both opinions, and those of the “let’s figure out what works best for you” opinion (not that I think anyone is of the “PUT ALL THE WOMEN ON BC WHETHER TEY WANT IT OR NOT! opinion).

Post # 11
3677 posts
Sugar bee

Check out the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Wechsler. It’s all about Fertility Awareness (basically the same as NFP but not religiously motivated) and will give you reliable scientific information about its effectiveness and limitations.

Post # 12
1315 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: December 2011

NFP can work great. It IS hard work.

One thing I suggest to people who are nervous is buying a fertilty monitor like Clear Blue. Google the Marquette method. This method uses an electronic device to confirm what you are seeing through CM.

I totally understand feeling like you will screw it up because I felt the same way. I felt like my body never matched what was in the books. Having a fertility monitor really takes the guess work out of it. But you MUST be vigilant about not making love before the time is right. You MUST be strict about this or the method won’t work.

The other thing is that with you being on the pill for so long it may take a long time for your cycles to regulate, and it’s possible they never will. As I’m sure you know the Pill sort of covers up symptoms of reproductive problems – many women start taking the pill as soon as they menstruate and therefore are never evaluated for things like PCOS or other endocrine issues. NFP can be very challenging if you turn out to be someone who doesn’t have regular cycles, but once again it is NOT impossible. Don’t give up!

Post # 13
5767 posts
Bee Keeper
  • Wedding: October 2014

I have a question. I’m not trying to snark. Genuinely curious.

for Catholics, why is birth control forbidden yet it’s permissible to use all sorts of technology to determine when you’re most and least likely to be fertile, in order to avoid your fertile times? I mean, either way, you’re using man made intervention to prevent pregnancy while still enjoying sex for the purpose of pleasure. If sex without the chance (or with a greatly decreased chance) of pregnancy is wrong, then why does it matter if you’re preventing the pregnancy by pulling out, charting, or the pill? Or am I just wrong on the whole catholic ban on contraception?


can anyone enlighten me?

Post # 14
82 posts
Worker bee
  • Wedding: November 2013

@Horseradish:  The only method that the Catholic Church supports is NFP due to the fact that it is the only preventable measure that does not involve directly or physically “stopping” pregnancy from happening. Condoms, the pill, and pulling out all in some way physically stop the sperm from reaching the egg. With NFP, the couple is just taught to learn the woman’s cycle so that they can abstain from sex on her fertile days. Using a tool such as ovulation monitors to find out what her fertile days are do not go against NFP. THey are just allowing the woman to find out when she is ovulating so that she knows just not to have sex during that window of time. This is why, to me, it is not completely fool proof because you are still having “unprotected sex”, but you are trusting your own charting methods and ovulation monitors to whether or not you are ovulating. I’m sure it works for some women, but there is still a chance that you may become pregnant if you miscalculate your fertile/nonfertile days. 

Although I am Catholic, I do not practice NFP because most of the evidence supporting NFP with the 99% success rate are Catholic based literature and websites. I think there is more room for human error with NFP, and don’t trust myself 100% not to make errors lol. 

Post # 15
1068 posts
Bumble bee
  • Wedding: July 2014

We’re (non-religious) planning on using NFP after we’re married to avoid pregnancy/achieve pregnancy.  There are a lot of people who think that it’s just calendaring/cycle beads, which is a far less accurate method of keeping track of your cycle.  The method-related failures are incredibly low (although you have to be super diligent about it).  I think there are some valid concerns about it (specifically, how committed are you to NFP?), but many of the concerns result from lack of information.

Post # 16
105 posts
Blushing bee
  • Wedding: October 2013

@Horseradish:  Hey! 

If sex without the chance (or with a greatly decreased chance) of pregnancy is wrong, then why does it matter if you’re preventing the pregnancy by pulling out, charting, or the pill?

Sex without the chance of chance of pregnancy is not wrong. We can have sex whenever we want if we are married. Actually, what the church teaches is that sex always carries with it the chance for new life to be concieved, and as such we have to act responsibly. What bc in effect says is “It’s ok, you can have sex and not worry about creating a little one!” The church teaches that children are the natural consequence of sexual relations, and as such we must come to it responsibly.

An example i’ve heard is eating and nutrition. Now, when we get hungry… we eat. But the purpose of eating isn’t about how good the food tastes… it’s about giving your body what it needs. Likewise, a major purpose of sex is to create life. Our bodies enjoy it so that we’ll do it. I don’t think many people would let anyone into their body if it didn’t feel GOOD. Another purpose to sex is to unite spouses, which is why it’s encouraged to have sex often. However, the church also knows that there maybe times that it is prudent to hold off on getting pregnant. In these times, the church says it’s ok to abstain to prevent pregnancy. The great thing about NFP is that this choice is made every month, encouraging reflection and communication between spouses. 

Regardless, we have to be open the possibility that any given sexual encounter can create life. I would really encourage you read Humanae Vitae when you get a chance, it helped change my view on artificial contraception. Another quick thing, the RCC view on contraception is part of a larger theology about our bodies and how they relate to God. Considering that the church is as old as it is, it would be really hard to summarize everything she says (we’re talking 2,000 years!) 

Also, pulling out is against church teaching. 

Man, I really hope that I was clear. Other Catholic bees, please correct me if I wrote something that was against church teaching. I hope that helped clear some things out! I’m not a theologan by any stretch of the imagination, so i’d advise you to look up the vatican documents that directly deal with this issue.

OP- I’m nervous too! I’m reading Taking Charge of Your Fertility and I feel confident about the science about charting and such. I’m also coming off the pill, but I am having sex with my FI. It’s only recently that i’ve come to see the truth about contraception and the beauty of the Church. I would say “Pray”!! My mom had me at 17, before she had even graduated high school. I’m so thankful she did! I may not have had all that much growing up, but I had my parents and two younger sisters. 🙂 Remember that God provides. 

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