Post # 1
What are your thoughts on nieces & nephews not calling you aunt or uncle and just calling you by your first name alone? My sil kids call both DH & I by our first names often. DH is “uncle ______” 50% of the time, while I am almost exclusively addressed by my first name alone. Background: They are only 7 & 10 years old. I have been with DH for almost 8 years now and married for 2.5 years, so it isn’t like I am new to the scene.
Post # 3
@lilbear: Have you spoken with the parents to clarify how you prefer to be addressed by children?
Post # 4
I don’t really care, I call my aunts and uncles “aunt xx” or “uncle xx” half of the time as well. I did so more when I was little. But when our parents refer to their siblings as just the name without the aunt/uncle you get used to calling them by just that name. My sister has been calling me Auntie Jen to my 4 year old niece since she was born, but my niece only uses auntie once in a while, she usually just says Jen. The nieces and nephew on FI’s side have known me since they were 5, 10, 13, so now their parents call me auntie in reference but usually the kids just say Jen. Doesn’t bother me at all. I see it as a term of endearment more than a formal name that should be use.
Post # 5
@jny1179: When I was little I said “Aunt x” and “uncle x”
For some reason – now that I’m older I call my aunts by their first names but I still call my Uncles “Uncle x”
Post # 6
I wouldn’t care at all. However, I’ve never been big on the whole proper names thing.
Post # 7
@lilbear: I would call each other Aunt and Uncle around the kids
Post # 8
I have always called my aunts and uncles with the title “aunt” and “uncle”. My DH has always just called his by their first name. I think it could be a geographic thing. I was raised in the south, where it’s custom to address elders by a title. DH was raised up north, and many of his friends are the same as he is.
Post # 9
I always called my aunts and uncles by their first names unless I was introducing them. For instance “This is my Aunt Kim”, but when calling them or something I would just say “Kimmy” and now I just say “Kim”.
Post # 10
I don’t care. I don’t mind if random kids call me by my first name instead of Mrs X, either. I think respect and affection are conveyed in a variety of ways and are not limited to titles.
Post # 11
my husband’s nieces and nephews are the same- they refer to everyone by their first names. i feel that it’s inappropriate and from what i’ve observed in my husband’s family, there’s a lack of respect there because i think the kids forget that they’re not talking to their friends or cousins, they’re talking to their aunts/uncles and they need to watch their mouths sometimes. and good manners aren’t exactly a strong point with them to begin with, so…
whenever we give birthday gifts or whatever, we always sign the card “from aunt and uncle….” and my husband and i have agreed that when we have kids they are going to say aunt/uncle so-and-so.
Post # 12
Well I know I call my Aunt “Amanda”, “Aunt Amanda” but she remarried maybe ten years ago and I call him “David”. No Uncle because he wasn’t my Uncle. I know my niece will call me “Titi” and my fiance just by his first name. Because he’s not her uncle. I suppose if we were married at the time it would be weird…
But I did correct her when she was younger
when she was just learning everyones names, I told her she has to address grown UPS with their title. Mr. Mrs. Grandmom etc
Post # 13
@lilbear: I thought you were going to say they were toddlers! They are old enough to know better. If they are not told and expected to do otherwise, they will continue. Someone has to correct them :-/
Post # 14
Now that I’m older, I definitely only call them by their first name. As far as nieces/nephews, well since the nephew is only 10 months, he’s not really talking yet lol. But my niece will call me either Caitlyn, Aunt KK, or just KK equally. Doesn’t bother me any. As long as she’s adressing me personally and not “hey, you!” Lol I’m happy. 🙂
I’m from the south, I don’t know if that even makes a difference, my FI is from up north, and he generally calls his aunts (blood relatives) “Aunt so & so” and his uncles by marraige just by their first name.
Post # 15
I didn’t start doing that until I was in college (and then only when talking about them, I always use Aunt/Uncle when talking to them), but my DH’s family doesn’t do Aunt/Uncle, they call everyone by their first names!
I was shocked!
Post # 16
I’ve always called my aunts and uncles with their respective title and first name, and still do so, decades later. My grown nephews also address me as “Aunt” (which I love!) and my daughter does the same with her aunt and uncle.