- 6 years ago
- Wedding: September 2012
I’m kinda down today, so I figured I would just let it all out in a post. AF showed up today, which means no baby. The idea to have a baby was kinda spur of the moment, so I wasn’t expecting too much. But after AF being late and making myself ok with the idea, I kinda found myself getting my hopes up. So it was a quite a blow when she decided it was time to show up, finally! We are going to try again after we get married next month which is great, but I always had this feeling as if I’ll never be able to have kids, so the whole idea still makes me feel really anxious. I guess we’ll see!
Another thing that got me down is I had to drop my FI off at the airport this morning. His work has been sending him away a lot on business which stinks. We have no family that lives close by so I’m alone with the 2 cats. I’ve been actively looking for a job since we moved here last year but haven’t had any luck. So being alone with no work is beyond depressing. I’ve worked since I was 14, so being without a job has been pretty brutal. I’m thankful that my FI has a good job that takes care of us, but I feel guilty that he has to support me.
Sadly I don’t have many hobbies, the only one I seem to stick with is reading. I read so much it’s ridiculous! I’ve been actively searching for a hobby that will help me get through this time of unemployment, and loneliness, but I can’t seem to stick to anything. Any suggestions?
Sorry for this “Woe, is me” post. Just feelin a little down. For anyone who reads this, thank you!