(Closed) No children at destination wedding?

posted 6 years ago in Destination Weddings
Post # 3
Member
812 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: April 2014

@HerNameWasLola:  

 

It depends on what part of the US are you going to be having your wedding. There are a lot of daycare centers around Atlanta that are either 24/7 or at least open to late hours. Or you could possible hire a temporary au pair just for the night. Or maybe even post on a local college campus what you are looking for in a sitter and what it wall entail.

It’s always good to have a plan A, B, and C.

Post # 4
Member
4194 posts
Honey bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - Baltimore Museum of Industry

Depending on the ages of the kids/where/when you’re getting married, your overseas guests could be bringing their kids.

Some hotels offer help with baby sitting services, but I think you’d be best with getting people you know, or friends’ babysitters. You could include a separate card with the invite that reads something like- “Our ceremony and reception will be an adults-only event. If your family will require child care during this time, please email the bride at XYZ.” 

If you send out save the dates, make sure they note that the ceremony/reception are adults only. Also- might be nice to have a day after breakfast with everyone, or some other event where the kids are invited- could be a casual BBQ in someone’s backyard.

Post # 6
Member
2282 posts
Buzzing bee
  • Wedding: June 2012

I’m paying a sitter to take care of babies during my wedding – kids can come to the other events leading up to the wedding, but we are holding to a strict “no one under 12” at the wedding itself, for every reason you listed above.

And we have some unhappy relatives who are refusing to come at all because they don’t want to leave their kids with a babysitter here, and don’t want to leave them with someone while they travel, so they’re just not coming. 

Post # 8
Member
501 posts
Busy bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

one problem that I could see is that people coming from Austrailia may not be comfortable leaving their children in a foreign place with a stranger. I don’t have kids, but if I did, i wouldn’t leave them with a stranger to watch them.

Maybe you could have a cousin or hire someone to do the babysitting somewhere near the wedding location.

There is such a huge distance and long flight between the two countries that I don’t see how you could nicely ask. You could have FI’s parents put feelers out to his family and see how they react.

Post # 10
Member
7904 posts
Bumble Beekeeper
  • Wedding: March 2012 - Pelican Grand Beach Resort

I think you need to have childcare on site for the kids of those traveling far. They will likely make a family vacation out of this. If you’re at a hotel, just rent a big room, order a bunch of food and movies, and hire a sitter. Most hotels can recommend one.

Post # 12
Member
21 posts
Newbee
  • Wedding: September 2012

Think of it this way, you are inviting people from outside of the US to come to your wedding and leave their child in a strange home with a stranger in another country for your wedding.  I have a child and will tell you it would not happen.  I recommend having a room at the hotel where the reception is if you are at a hotel and having people you know watch them in the room; that way the parents can check on them.  If not, then I would send my husband to the wedding and and stay with my child.  You are asking them to put complete trust in someone they don’t know, in a foreign country.  This is something many do not understand until they have children; you can’t trust everyone with your child even some people you know.

Post # 14
Member
3175 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: May 2012

I think you need to provide childcare, and also be comfortable that people may decline because of this. You’re certainly entitled to hold whatever wedding you’d like, but you can’t be upset if people aren’t comfortable leaving their children behind in Australia or letting a stranger in a strange place sit for them.

FWIW, I’m attending a child free DW this fall, and I’m leaving my son behind with my MIL. I’m excited to have some adult time, but everyone has a different situation, and you have to respect that if you choose to have that type of wedding.

Post # 15
Member
3472 posts
Sugar bee
  • Wedding: July 2012 - The Gables Inn, Santa Rosa, CA

You can hire a professional licensed sitter for the evening of the wedding– depending on the # of kids, you may need 2– and tell the guests that they can drop off their kids at X location (hotelroom or family residence, whichever is easier) and pick them up after.  

As you said, you can’t reasonably expect them to fly 1/2 way around the world and not bring the kids, but it would be perfectly acceptable to ask them to leave the kids with the sitter (that you provide) Depending on the situation, you can also make all the arrangements for the sitter, but then ask the parents to all go in together on a sitter, and split the cost between all the parents for the night, if you don’t want to pay for it. But you need to tell them this in advnace (when they RSVP) so they can plan for it.  I would recommend sending out an e-mail to all the parents who will be attending saying that this child care option is available– it will cost X amount total, but when split between each household it’s only X amount for all the kids for the whole evening, that way they know it’s available and how much it’ll cost, without having to find reliable and trustworthy child care in a forgein country. 

http://www.care.com is a great site for hiring trusted child care. 

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