Post # 1
Am I the only one out there who is opting not to have a Father Daughter dance? My culture is not the lovey dovey type and showing emotion is something rarely seen. I would feel really ackward dancing with my father who doesn’t dance to begin with however my FI says I should do it anyway…out of tradition. We aren’t even doing a bouquet toss or the garder thingy…so why can’t I not do a Father/Daughter dance. Anyone out there not doing a father/daughter dance?
Post # 3
I didn’t have one. I have two dads: one step and the other I don’t talk to, so it didn’t make sense for me to do it. I say do whatever you want…or don’t want.
Post # 4
I don’t want to do a father/daughter dance either. My dad, although fantastic, is super uncomfortable with the idea. My fiance’s mother really wants to do a mother/son dance though so not sure what we’ll end up doing.
Post # 5
I agree, do what you want. There’s so much going on at a wedding, and people have been to so many weddings where things get added or deleted, they won’t even notice.
Do what makes you comfortable and happy! Sounds like you’re already doing that my cutting the bouquet/garter, which a lot of people are doing nowadays. If your FI has a strong opinion, particularly because he wants to do a mother/son dance like swp02138 situation, go ahead and let them do one. Doesn’t mean you have to join in.
Just remember that people are there to celebrate with you and you’ll throw such a great party, that’s all they are going to see. If anyone gets bent out of shape because you skipped the father/daughter dance, it’s their deal. I think the only people to be concerned about is your mom & dad, but it sounds like they are indifferent to it so skip the dance.
Post # 6
I am in a similar situation. I am close to my stepdad and with my dad. I feel weird dancing with only one. However, I think that if I were to split the dance between my biological father and step dad that my bio father would feel weird and slightly offended. Did anyone else do something different?
GreenTeaGuinness, I think it’s perfectly acceptable to include traditions you want and dont want. I think it is your wedding and that you should personalize it the way you want. I knew a couple that instead of doing a traditional mother/son or Father/daughter dance, they just did a slide show and showcased a special portion of it dedicated to their parents. Also, I would think about making sure you have a few entertaining things instead, like cake cutting, or toasts, etc just so you have some things for your guests to look forward to. You don’t want them to just eat and then cut to dancing and call it a night.
Post # 7
- Wedding: June 2007 - Bride's family summer home in the Adirondacks
I didn’t officially do one, but at one point my dad asked me to dance so we ended up dancing for a bit randomly with everyone else on the dancefloor. Good enough for me! Mr. Bluebell didn’t dance with his mom at all – she just didn’t want to dance, let alone with everyone watching them. So don’t do it unless you feel like it!
Post # 8
it’s your wedding – do whatever you feel comfortable with. we’ve chucked most of the wedding traditions: no father/daughter dance, mother/son dance, or bouquet/garter toss. we’re not even having bridesmaids or groomsmen at the ceremony. we just wanted an intimate ceremony and live jazz music (w/o dance floor) at our reception.
Post # 9
I’m not going to do one. And I’m not doing the bouquet toss, garter toss, etc.
Post # 10
Same as the others here =) No father daughter dance, dad’s not walking me down the hypothetical aisle, no bouquet/garter toss.
There’s nothing that you ‘have to’ do, really, except signing the certificate with your FI!
Post # 11
SoonToBeMrs: I am in a similar situtation. My stepdad and dad are both a huge part of my life. My mother really wanted my stepdad to walk me half way down the aisle. I was completely opposed; my father’s feelings would be hurt even though they are all friends and get along. However, when the priest asks "Who gives this woman?" I want my mother, father and stepdad to stand together and say, "We do."
At the reception, I’ve decided I’m going to dance with them both. I don’t care if it takes extra time and people are annoyed; I want to honor him without hurting my father. Maybe something like that is an option for you?